Memories Behind Us
by MemoriesUnderTheFloorboards
Summary: After Edward leaves, Bella eventually sees that things in Forks aren't going to get any better. So she decides that Forks should be left behind, along with other memories. But what will her future hold?
1. Decision

I do not own Twilight or New Moon or any of the characters associated with those books. An amazing author named Stephenie Meyer does.

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It had been two months since he had left. The pain still didn't go away when I thought about _him_. Even the cold December snow didn't numb the sting. Anything that I saw seemed to remind me of his face, his voice. I stopped listening to music, I stopped reading, anything that brought up his name or his memory only made it harder to breathe. 

When Renee had first come to take me to Florida, I had still been in shock. But when she said I was leaving the place that a piece of him still seemed to linger in, I couldn't bear to leave. I suppose I still thought it wasn't real, that he would come back. But these months alone have shown me the truth. He really doesn't love me, and he's not coming back. With this in mind, I walked downstairs into the living room where Charlie was watching TV.

"I'm leaving Forks." I told him, and I watched as the mix of shock and confusion crossed his face.

"What do you mean Bells? Leaving where?" He said.

"To Florida. I'm gonna go live with Mom and Phil." I told him. It wasn't a question or a guess. This is what was going to happen, and nothing he said or did could stop me. I needed to get out of this town.

He simply nodded and said "Does your mom know?" I nodded back; I had already emailed her and let her know I was coming. She had agreed wholeheartedly.

"When are you leaving?" he asked, and the fact that he didn't try to stop shocked me for a second. But I guess it wasn't hard to see that I wasn't doing well here. He probably saw this as a way to make me better. That's exactly what I hoped too.

"As soon as possible. I want to try to leave on the earliest flight tomorrow." Anything to get me out. When every waking moment of my life brought only painful memories, and I couldn't even sleep without waking up screaming, it's not hard to understand that I needed to get out of here quick. Charlie got out of his seat and walked over to the phone.

"I'm going to call Renee to make sure everything's okay, then you can leave tomorrow." He told me as he picked up the phone and started to dial. I smiled, for the first time in it seemed like too long, and walked upstairs. I packed my clothes and got my pajamas on. I didn't bother to call anyone to let them know I was leaving. This would be easier if I just left. I chuckled to myself as I thought of this a 'clean break'. But then that just brought on a new wave of nausea, because that memory was tied to _him. _So I turned off my light and went to sleep.

As usual, I woke up the next morning screaming.

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So, what do you think? I want to know! Reviews are greatly appriciated! And please, constructive criticism, not hate mail.


	2. Memories

Once again, I don't own Twilight or New Moon, they belong to Stephenie Meyer.

Anywho, enjoy chapter 2!

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As I sat on the side of my bed and calmed down my breathing, I considered the fact that by the end of the day, I would no longer be here. Here in Forks where the memories came all too often in a cascade of pain and depression. As I stumbled down the stairs to get breakfast, I thought of what life would be like in Jacksonville.

No more reminders of the way it had been. Nothing there was familiar, nothing there had any meaning. Nothing there was linked to _him. _Perhaps, even, no more nightmares. I had to smile at the last one. My lack of sleep was really starting to affect my thought process at school.

School, I thought. How was that going to work out? I guess that I just needed some transfer papers or something. Whatever, school didn't matter. As long as I wasn't going to this school, in this town. The school he used to – no, can't think of that. I must focus. Must continue to breathe normally. Must make pop tarts. Must forget he exists, if at all possible.

After I was done focusing on eating every bite very slowly instead of focusing on him, I went upstairs and looked around my room. I had packed all of my clothes last night, so I began to rummage around to grab other things I may want. I grabbed my money out of the back of my sock drawer, a pathetic hiding place, but useful. Now I didn't even have to go to the bank.

I walked across the room and looked at the scrapbook my mom had given me. It would hurt her feelings if I didn't bring it along. I opened it and looked at the pictures of my friends. I hadn't even opened this book since I had searched for the pictures I knew wouldn't be inside. The pictures of _him_, gone, as if he had never existed. I closed the book, and walked across the room again to throw it in my bag. I tried not to think of him, instead listening to the sound of my footsteps on the floorboards.

If I hadn't been listening so intently, I never would have noticed, but stepping on one certain floorboard made a slightly different sound than the others. I backtracked and stepped on it again. Sure enough, the noise it made was a different sound, almost hollowed, like there was more space.

I tossed the book on my bed and kneeled onto the floor. I ran my finger around the edge of the panel, and found that it wasn't in place just right. Like it had been moved and then replace hastily. I pried around the edges till I found a good spot, and I slowly jiggled the board out of place. I set the plank aside and looked down, sure that I would be looking right down into the kitchen.

I gasped with astonishment when I saw his face, perfectly angelic, smiling up at me. The shock set in. I couldn't move. I just looked at the picture laying there, his eyes warm with the love he no longer felt. But for some reason the pain didn't come. When my hand reached down to pick up the pile of photos from inside my floor, it seemed to move with its own mind. I flipped through them and saw the expressions on his face change, from warmth, to reserve, to a cold stone like glare.

Underneath the photos was the CD he had made me. I had gotten rid of my CD player because I no longer listened to music. But staring at the blank disc, I could remember my lullaby perfectly.

Holding these memories, I wondered why the hole in my chest wasn't burning, why the nausea wasn't causing me to throw these items across the room and run away from this place as fast as possible. Instead, I simply got up and replaced the photos in the album, and put the CD into my bag. Maybe when I healed, maybe when I was somewhere new, I could look at these again and think of my time here as a gift.

Placing the album in my bag next to the CD, I then returned the floorboard to its place, then grabbed my bag and walked downstairs. Charlie was back and he looked like he was very tired. He saw me with my luggage and asked me,

"Are you sure this is what you want, Bella?"

I knew this was what he wanted, because I knew he wanted me to be happy. He wanted be to get better, even if that meant having to fly all the way across the country. And I knew it was what I wanted, so I simply nodded once. He sighed, then started outside and said,

"I'll drive you to the airport, then." And we both walked outside together. I looked back at the house one more time, and then got into the cruiser. As we drove away, I didn't look back, because all I wanted was to leave the memories behind.

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Once again, reviews and comments are greatly appreciated! Thanks for reading!


	3. Gone

Again, Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

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As I sat alone, I tried to tell myself that this was what was best. That everything would work out and that life could go on as normal. I would be just fine by myself, and I would survive. Maybe.

I looked at the sky and wondered how long I could go on fooling myself. How long would it be before I cracked? Before I had to go back to Forks, had to remember that day, the day that my world became meaningless, and then make things right. I sighed and placed my head in my hands. I knew it wouldn't be too much longer.

My phone rang in my pocket. I ignored it and let the boring ringtone drown out the noises around me. When it stopped, I began to think again.

I closed my eyes, and my love's face was there. I quickly opened them, knowing that seeing that face only made this harder on myself. But I closed them again, aware that that I couldn't resist seeing those eyes. Loving, and caring, but I knew that that was no longer how things were.

My phone rang again. I sighed and picked it up. I was shocked at the number. What would she be calling me for? But knowing Alice, it must be important. I flipped the phone open and placed it to my ear.

"Alice, what do you want?" I said, and I couldn't help that the annoyance seeped through my voice. Her response was instant and firm.

" Edward, Bella left Forks. And I can't see where she's gone." She told me, and I suddenly couldn't move. My eyes opened wide and my breathing stopped.

My Bella was gone, and I didn't know where.

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Yes, this chapter was from Edward's perspective! How was it? I know it was kinda short, but I'm hoping to write more from his perspective if people like it. Please, I adore reviews! Let me know what you think, even if it is critisism! I don't like people who need a certain number of reviews to keep writing, but it's great to know that people are reading and liking this story, especially because this is my first.


	4. New Life

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer

Enjoy chapter 4! It's a little longer than the last one :)

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I walked off of the plane in Jacksonville. The flight had been, for the most part, pretty boring. They had shown some mushy romantic movie that had me wanting to throw up at ten thousand feet in the air. Thank God for earplugs.

As I walked through the airport searching for my mom, I thought back to my parting with Charlie. Neither of us were much for the showing of emotional outbursts. So we simply hugged and he had whispered to me.

"I hope you feel better soon Bells. I'll miss you." I nodded to him and said,

"You know, you've been the best Dad a girl could hope for." He blushed a bright red and smiled. I had meant it. He was there when I thought that life held no more meaning, and he had stood by me. Even now, letting me go was hard, but he was doing it because he knew it was best for me.

We quick hugged again, and then I had gotten on the plane. It took me until after we got into the air to figure out that I may never see him again, because I had no intentions of ever going back to Forks. I had shed a tear, but then stared out the window.

From this point onward, I had told myself, you are starting a new life. The past is behind you, and there's nothing you can do about it. Remember the times fondly if you must, but don't dwell on them. Move on, forget if nessesary.

So as I wound my way through the crowd, I repeated those words in my head. This is your new life, live in the future, not in your memories.

A few yards away I heard someone yelling my name. I looked over to see my mom and Phil both waving at me. I walked over and after the hugs and greetings, we picked up my bags and walked out into the Jacksonville sun.

And already I felt better. The sun, it was something I felt like I hadn't seen in forever, it was something new. This was something that I definitely wanted to have in my new life. I smiled the entire way that Phil drove us home.

As I walked into the house I was struck by the simplicity of it. I remembered my mom telling me about it once, saying it was just like a house from a movie. And it was, just like one of those 50's TV shows where the mom works in the kitchen wearing an apron and high heels, and the dad returns from his hard day of work with his briefcase. I laughed at the crazy idea of my mother in the kitchen and Phil carrying a briefcase.

My mom showed me upstairs to my room, which had formerly been the guestroom. She sat down on the bead and looked at me.

"Bella, your dad tells me that, while you were getting better, you still weren't doing very well. Is this move really want you want?" she asked me with worry in her eyes, most likely remembering my tantrum last time they tried to get me to move.

"Don't worry, mom. This is really what I want. This is where I need to be right now." I said, and smiled for reassurance. She got up and hugged me and said,

"Then why don't I help you to unpack, okay?"

I sighed. Charlie wouldn't have done this, in fact he hadn't. But then I stopped myself from thinking about the past. I just looked at my mom with a tired expression and asked,

"If you don't mind mom, I'd really like to unpack by myself. You know, just have some time to think. I'll admit this was really sudden, even if it was my idea." She smiled and nodded and walked toward the door.

"Call me if you need anything." And she smiled and walked out. I looked around my new room. The walls were and off white, and the ceiling was a dark blue. The bed, on the same wall as the door, just to the right, had covers that matched the ceiling, and the pillows were a crisp white. You could tell that this room wasn't used often, because it was much to clean. On the opposite wall were two windows looking out to the driveway. Apparently my room was all the way at the end of the hall. I opened the closet on the left side of the room and began placing my clothes on the hangers and shelves.

As I was unpacking I found the album. Looking at it, my hands shook. This was the actual physical embodiment of my past. Should I throw it out now, or burn it or something? This was everything I was running from.

But no. I placed it in the farthest reaches of the closet, along with the CD, where I would never run across it by accident. Best case scenario, I would never see it again and I would forget everything. Worst case scenario, the album would somehow end up opened in my lap, _his_ eyes gazing out of the page into mine.

I wasn't quite sure which scenario I wanted more.

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So yeah, I'll admit this chapter was kinda fluff. But have no fear! I have the next chapter planned out, and things are going to get interesting! Oops, did I just give you a cliffhanger? As always comments are greatly appreciated, even critisism! Thanks to those who have been commenting!


	5. Familiar Yet Unknown

Again, Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer. In this chapter I do introduce new characters of my own creation, but don't really care of someone uses them, just please ask me first!

And yay! This chapter is a lot longer than my previous ones, so for those of you who asked, here it is! Enjoy chapter 5!

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School was not as much of a problem as I thought it would be. Apparently someone had just mailed some forms and they made a few calls and I was set. Not that the forms were what I was worried about. 

In Forks, I had known the name of every single person who went to the high school, regardless of age or grade. There were simply that small a number of students.

But now I was in Jacksonville, and even though I couldn't be sure of the exact number, I knew that every class probably had more than a thousand students. This was going to be a drastic change.

As I waited for the bus, because I didn't have a car yet, I thought about the fact that I may turn into the girl I was in Phoenix. The quiet, strangely pale, clumsy girl who nobody really cared about, much less talked to. Could I make friends? The fact that I had transferred in the middle of the school year was not going to help.

As I pondered, the bus pulled up and, after a deep breathe, I walked on. There weren't many kids, so I must be one of the first stops. The few that weren't listening to iPods or in a conversation looked up. I suppose that they had realized this wasn't a usual stop. I blushed from the stares, and sat in one of the seats closer to the front.

A bleach blond girl who hadn't been sitting with anyone walked up from the back and sat down in the seat across from me. She was tan, and had three piercings in each ear. With her stick-like figure and the other features, she looked like one of the teens that fit the beach girl stereotypes. When she spoke, it was a high pitched, girly sound, almost as if it came from someone much younger.

"Hi, my name's Amber. Are you, like, new or something?" she questioned me. I just nodded. I was stunned that she was so forward. And her name seemed oddly familiar.

"That's, like, totally awesome! Weird, our teachers didn't say anything. You'd think that they'd have, like, mentioned it." Oh, yes. She fit the stereotype perfectly.

"Well, the decision to move was really sudden." I said, and her eyes grew wide.

"Are your parents, like, in the army, or the secret service, or something? You know, like, the kind that has to move a lot?" she asked as she stared at me in awe. This girl must be one of the greatest minds of her generation.

"No, actually my parents are divorced. I just decided to move in with my mom." Her face sunk.

"Oh, I guess that's interesting," she sulked. The bus stopped at a development. A friend of hers apparently got on, because she got up and followed her.

"I'll see you later, okay?" she said as she left. She must have decided that I wasn't interesting anymore.

It suddenly hit me that Amber hadn't even bothered to ask me my name or what grade I was in. I turned around to look at her and her friend. When they saw me looking, they quickly looked away and stopped whatever they were whispering about. Had they been staring at me?

I understood. Amber was trying to get information on me to gossip about with her friends. I knew the rumors would probably be flying around by the time first period was over. At least she couldn't tell them that the freaky new girl had spy parents. This was going to be an exact copy of Phoenix.

By the time we got to school the bus was full, and in the throng of kids no one else had the chance to notice that I was new. But as we walked up to the school, I saw Amber in a throng of friends whispering and taking sidelong glances at me. This was going to be a long day.

I walked into the front office and the receptionist was typing something on her computer. When she heard the door close behind me she looked up.

"Hi, my name's Isabella Swan. This is my first day here and…" I started, but she cut me off,

"Yes, we knew you were coming. Here's your schedule and a school map. Hope you have a nice day." Then she went back to her computer. Wow, really hospitable. I turned and walked out of the office. This was already the complete opposite of Forks.

When I got into the hallway the bell rang, and the hallways cleared out. My first day here, and I was already late for class. I checked the map and headed in the direction I thought my homeroom was.

When I finally arrived at the right room, I slowly opened the door and peeked in. The teacher saw me and walked over.

"Are you Isabella Swan?" he asked. I nodded and mumbled 'yeah'. He led me to the front of the room.

"Everybody, this is Isabella Swan. She's a new student here, so can someone show her around and help her get around the school?" I just stood there like an extremely embarrassed statue.

A girl in the back of the class raised her hand. She had bright red hair that was tied into a low ponytail, and was wearing a pair of black rectangular glasses.

"Stacy, thank you. Isabella, you can go sit next to Stacy. Everyone else, try to stay quiet until the bell rings." And then he turned and went to sit at his desk. I walked to the back of the room while under the scrutiny of my fellow students. Stacy smiled at me and held out her hand. I reached out and shook it while I sat down at the empty desk next to her.

"My name's Stacy Weldon. It's nice to meet you Isabella."

"Please just call me Bella." I told her, and she smiled.

"No problem, Bella. What's your first class?" She asked. I checked my schedule.

"Economics with Mr. Hardner." I said, silently despairing. Only with my bad luck could I get a class like economics first thing in the morning. But Stacy seemed pleased.

"Awesome! That's my first class too!" she rejoiced, "We can walk together!"

That's when the bell rang. Everyone got up and filed out of the room. Stacy and I went with everyone as she drilled me on my past. Where was I from, why did I move, did I miss my friends, had I had a boyfriend (That one had stung, and I replied with a simple "no"), all the usual new kid questions.

I was amazed by the amount of kids in the hallway. I shouldn't have been, because it wasn't any more than Phoenix, but I guess I had adjusted to small town living.

When we got into Economics, I saw that most kids had already come in and taken their seats. They were tables with space enough for two, so I supposed we were going to be doing a lot of partner work. Stacy said,

"You should probably go talk to the teacher. I'd ask you to sit with me, but Mr. Hardner gives assigned seats," and she made a face. I laughed and she smiled. "I'll show you to your next class too, if you want me to."

"Sure, thanks a lot." And she nodded. I walked up through the row of desks to the teacher. He was a partially balding man who was, to put is nice, rotund. When I explained that I was new, he pointed out a seat in the back of the room. No one else was sitting, so I figured that maybe I did have a little luck and wasn't going to be stuck with a partner.

I sat down and waited for the bell to ring. When class started I listened to the lesson. Mr. Hardner was going over something we had already finished in Forks, in the beginning of the school year. Great, I thought, I know the entire curriculum, so now this class will be a breeze.

About halfway through the period, someone walked in from the back of the room. Since I knew everything the teacher was talking about, I was pretty spaced out and didn't even notice the student until I heard my name.

"Oh, and you have a new partner. That's Miss Swan." I heard Mr. Hardner say. I looked up at the student, and my new economics partner, in the front of the room.

And my mouth dropped open of its own accord. I just stared at him as he walked back to our desk and sat down. I couldn't take my eyes off him, and he must have noticed. He glanced over at me from the corner of his eye and smiled. He must have thought that I was staring because he was gorgeous.

And he was. Obscenely gorgeous. But that wasn't the only reason. I also stared because of his perfect features. I stared because of his graceful movements. I stared because of his unnaturally pale skin. I stared because of his amber eyes.

I stared because he was a vampire.

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I have to say, writing cliffhangers is much more fun than reading them! Please review, comments and ideas are always welcome!


	6. Shinning

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

Sorry that I didn't update sooner, but I got new furniture and had to unplug and move my computer around, and somehow my internet got messed up. I also had a hard time writing this chapter, I have no idea why. Thanks to LaLaLovely47, who helped me out! Anywho, enjoy!

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As I stared at him, he just stared back. His hair was a dark black, so dark that it almost seemed to have a blue tint. His eyes were the amber color I expected, with only a thin amount of black around the edges. I couldn't believe it. A vampire was sitting next to me in my economics class. How could this be possible?

I forced my eyes away and focused intently on the letter 'n' written on the blackboard. Taking deep, slow breaths, I analyzed the situation with a little more clarity.

The probability that my economics partner was a vampire was practically impossible. This must be a regular old, run of the mill extremely pale, gorgeous boy who happened to have amber ayes. And walked with enough grace to be a ballet dancer. A _really_ good ballet dancer. And he just happened to smell better than any cologne on this planet.

'Oh God, was I just smelling him?' I thought. I peeked out of the corner of my eye at him. He was still staring at me, so I quickly looked away. I heard a sound come from him that I thought was a chuckle.

For heavens sake, who was I trying to kid? This guy wasn't a guy, he was a vampire. And he was sitting next to me in economics class. In my new school. In Jacksonville, Florida. Because I apparently attract vampires like fish to water.

'Wait,' I thought, 'we're in Jacksonville. It's the middle of the day, and the sun is shinning like there's no tomorrow. Is this even possible?' I was too afraid to look at him again, but I didn't remember him glittering. And if he had, then the entire class would probably be in a panic by now. So it wasn't possible he was a vampire, right? No sparkle, no way. But he hadn't been in any direct sunlight, and the room was a little dim. Maybe…

But everything else added up. This didn't make any sense. Just when I thought I was about to go insane, the bell rang. Everyone got up and began to walk out of the room. When I went to follow, I found I couldn't move. I guess the shock hadn't left me yet. But from the corner of my eye I saw _him_ get up and walk by me. I thought he was gone, but suddenly someone leaned down next to my ear and whispered.

"Hope you have a nice day." My head whiped around to come face to face with my potential vampire. He smiled, a dazzling sight, and then turned and walked away. Stacy walked up and leaned on my desk.

"You, my friend, have just met the amazing Brendon Williams. The most gorgeous guy in the entire school. You are so lucky that you get to sit next to him!" She said while fanning herself with her hand.

"Yeah, um, I guess so…" I replied as I got up and we walked out of the room. Stacy showed me to my next class, all the while talking about how awesome and stunning Brendon was. As she was talking, I thought again about the fact that he may or may not be a vampire. In fact, I was still thinking about it the next period…..and the one after that…..and the one after that. When lunch came around, and Stacy invited me to sit with her and her friends, I was still wondering.

"Bella, these are my friends," Stacy said, breaking me from my trance, "the blond one is Corinne, Ally is the one with iPod, don't try to make her turn it off, and this is Danielle. Everyone, this is Isabella Swan, Bella for short." Each one raised their hands as she said their name and murmured a 'hi' or 'hello'. Somehow Ally had heard and responded even with the headphones on.

I nodded and said hello then sat down with them. Stacy started talking about me, filling them in. I guess she noticed that I wasn't really focused. The girl named Corinne looked over and said,

"You really used to live in Washington? The state? That's so far! What's it like?" she asked, all eyes on me.

"Um, yeah. Well, it rains all the time, and most days you can't really see the sun." They seemed to be waiting for more, so I added, "And there are a lot of trees, it's really green."

"Wow, I guess I can see why you moved here." The girl named Danielle said, with a look on her face. She stuck out her tongue, and we all laughed. It felt nice to have a girl talk. I could be honest with them, to an extent. The past I told them was all they would know. I could essentially recreate myself, change my image to one that I could be happy with.

We talked for a little while longer, about stuff I apparently needed to catch up on. Things like the style in Jacksonville, which informed me that I needed to buy new clothes, school classes that were difficult or easy, and what teachers I should watch out for. That's how economics class came up.

"Guys, guess who Bella is sitting next to in economics?" Stacy dished, "Brendon Williams!" There was a chorus of 'Now ways!' and 'lucky!' as I simply sat there and sighed. Not from happiness, but from the reminder of my mysterious class partner. "Look," I heard Stacy continue, "There he is!"

I glanced over to see Brendon walk in to the cafeteria. I suddenly became aware that the cafeteria was outside, and we were all in direct sunlight. As he walked into the light, all my worst fears were confirmed.

He glowed, he glittered, he was dazzling. Like every inch of his body was covered in the most brilliant crystal. And he was just walking across the cafeteria like everything was fine.

"He is just so stunning, isn't he?" Ally said with a sigh. Of course he was stunning, he was shinning! But they all turned away from him after another minute, and went back to talking.

Anyone who saw him shinning like that would never be able to look away that quickly. I glanced at the girls, then back at Brendon. He was just sitting there staring at his lunch, glowing. I turned back to my new friends.

"Hey guys," I asked tentatively, "What is Brendon doing right now?" They all looked over at me. If they saw what I saw, saw him for what he was, they would say something like 'Oh he's just glittering. Don't worry, he does that all the time! Here have some of my fries.'

But of course not, that would have been too easy. Instead, they all glanced over at him and answered,

"He's eating lunch, I guess. Why, was he doing something weird?" Danielle said innocently.

I froze for a second before saying, "No, I guess it was just a trick of the light." They went back to talking. So they couldn't see him for what he was. What did that mean?

The rest of lunch was finished without a problem, other than the vampire. I didn't even see him for the rest of the day. When I got home, my brain was melting from all the thought. Not just from the new school, but from trying to figure out why I seemed to be the only one who could 'see' Brendon. The bus ride had been torture, because there had been nothing else to do but think.

I got home earlier than everyone else, since Renee taught kindergarten, and Phil coached. So I turned on the TV to try and drown out the noise of my own thoughts.

"Hey honey, how was your day?" my mom asked when she got home. I searched for a phrase that could describe everything that had happened. How could I sum up the strangest events in my entire life?

"Interesting…" was all I could come up with.

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Well, now you have something to ponder over! Please, please, please review! And thank you to those who have already done so.


	7. Truths Revealed

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer

I thought this chapter would take longer, but it didn't. I had one of those burst of inspiration things. Enjoy!

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An entire week went by without anything happening. No new vampires, no mass killings in the school, no sudden 'Hey guys look! Brendon is sparkling in the sunlight! How come we never noticed before?'

I guess none of those things would happen, but I had just been waiting for something to change. It was like a shark had been thrown into a pool of minnows and hadn't eaten a single one. Not only that, but the minnows didn't even notice that shark was there.

Every morning he was in economics sitting next to me. He just sat there and smiled, every once in a while glancing over to stare at me for a few seconds. By the third day I was so close to standing up and screaming that I actually asked to go to the nurse.

At first I thought he stared because my heart was beating so fast that he was trying to decide which way to kill me. Then I thought that it might be because he knew that I knew his secret, and he was planning a way to kill me. Every reason I could think up ended with me dead.

On the fourth day, I decided to fight back. It was the middle of class, and everyone was working on a worksheet. He, of course, had finished within a few minutes, so he was just sitting there doing nothing. Then he turned, and began to look at me again.

So this time, when I noticed, I swung my head around to look him right in the eye. His look, only for a second, was one of intense concentration. Like he was trying to put a puzzle together, but couldn't figure out where one piece fit. Of course, as soon as I looked at him, his face turned from concentration, to complete shock.

"May I ask," I said with the most amount of annoyance I could muster, which wasn't really that hard, "what it is that you're starring at?"

He seemed stunned for a second, then began to answer, but was cut off by Mr. Hardener.

"Miss, Swan, is there something that you two would like to share with the class?"

I turned, and answered, "No, Mr. Hardener, just, um, checking answers."

He nodded and went back to whatever he was doing at his desk. I turned back to Brendon and glared one more time, then went back to my work. I didn't talk to him again, and he never made any other move to respond.

I had caught him looking at me like that a lot more after that instance. What I had thought was hate and anger seemed to actually be confusion and puzzlement. What was so odd about me? I had always known I was a little bit of a freak, but when vampires look at you funny, there has to be something really wrong.

The next Monday, I was dreading first period. I had spent the weekend trying to forget all about Brendon. My Mom had taken me shopping for more appropriate Florida clothing, and we had even gone to the beach. Not that a tan was something that really made a difference on my pale skin.

When I walked into class, I found Brendon already sitting down and waiting for the bell. When I sat down next to him, he reached out his hand to me. I just stared at it like an idiot.

"My name is Brendon Williams. We haven't been properly introduced yet." He said and smiled at me. I looked down at his hand, faintly glittering, and reached out to shake it. Apparently, he was expecting something else, because the slightest trace of disappointment crossed his face when we touched, before he once again composed his features. When our hands met, his was the cold hard granite I was expecting.

For a second everything was okay, but then reality hit me like a brick wall. Instead of Brendon's hand I was holding, it was _his_ hand. When I looked up, it was into _his_ eyes that I gazed. All of a sudden, I couldn't breath. I yanked my hand out of his grasp and stood up. My hands reached down to hold onto the desk for support. I felt woozy, my heart felt like it would jump out of my chest. My vision began to darken around the edges, and I felt myself begin to sway. From very far away, I heard Brendon say,

"Bella, what's wrong? Are you all right? Someone phone the nurse!" But it was _his_ voice I heard calling out to me. And suddenly, _he_ was there. It was not an imitation; it was not my mind hearing his voice in another's. He was there, speaking to me.

"Bella, you need to breathe," that perfect, velvet voice said to me. That voice I thought that would leave me once I was gone from Forks. That voice that I thought I would never hear again.

Edward's voice.

I fainted.

I woke up in the nurse's office. When I sat up, my head spun, so I fell back down again with a moan.

"You shouldn't try to get up yet," I heard the nurse say, "You've been out most of the day." I opened my eyes to look at the clock. She was right, I had one more period left, then school was over.

Like school was my biggest problem. How was I supposed to explain hearing Edwa- . I stopped myself, knowing if I said his name, even in my head, it would only bring more pain, and right now, with that pain, I would more than likely pass out again. I just needed to forget about this, tell myself it didn't happen. Even if I only heard it for a second, the most wonderful second of my existence, that meant nothing. Only that I needed to try harder to forget.

"Do you want to go to your next class, or should I call your mother to get you a ride home?" the nurse asked.

"No, I'll stay," I said, as I slowly got up off the uncomfortable bed. I saw that all of my books were on a chair next to me. "How did all my books get here? And how did I get here?" I was thinking out loud but the nurse heard and said,

"Brendon Williams carried you, and I think a girl named Stacy carried your books." Of course she would remember Brendon's name.

I picked up my books, got a pass to my next class, and walked out. What must everyone be thinking right now? I shake Brendon's hand, go into hysterics, and then faint, all in a crowded class of students. And what was he doing, carrying me to the nurse's office. What, was I now somehow incapable of riding in a wheelchair? The rumors must be flying all around school.

When I got to my class, my fears were confirmed. Everyone stared at me like I was the main event at the circus. Some girls actually giggled as I walked by. What a way to start off the week. Danielle was in this class, and as I walked by her she gave me a faint but reassuring smile. I tried to smile back, but found I was to tense to do so.

After class, I walked out of the school as fast as possible. I didn't want to talk to anyone, I didn't want to see anyone. I would walk home, and call my mom at a pay phone on the way so she could pick me up.

But nothing is ever that easy in my life. No, as I was walking out I had to pass a motorcycle, not that suspicious, just a blue Suzuki. But leaning against it was Brendon. As he saw me leaving he walked over. Slow enough to look like he was walking, but fast enough to reach me before I had taken two more steps.

"What do you want?" I demanded under by breath. I knew he could hear me. All the same, he seemed taken aback by my abrupt hostility.

"I was just wondering if you were alright. You seemed pretty bad when I carried you to the nurse's office." His face showed real concern. I didn't care in the slightest.

"Oh yeah, I meant to thank you about that," by voice brimmed over with sarcasm, "now the entire school thinks that I'm some sort of invalid."

"I didn't mean it that way." He said, insulted, "You just needed help, and if you didn't get to the nurse's office quickly, I was afraid that you might get worse."

"Oh really? Well I think that the only thing that anyone really needs to be afraid of in this school is you!" I didn't even think of the words as they came out of my mouth. All of my pent up feelings and emotions from that last week were pouring out of me now.

"What do you mean by that?" he asked, seemingly insulted, but I could detect the slightest hint of defense in his voice.

"You know exactly what I mean!" I shouted back. I felt the tears rolling down my cheeks. I was tired of playing these games, I was tired of putting on these false pretences.

"You ruined everything!" I shouted, my voice now breaking apart from sobs, "I came here to get away from what you are! But now you just bring everything back!" I stopped, my sobs now making speech impossible, and I covered my face in my hands and cried. From in between my fingers I could see his arm reach out towards me. I flung my arm out to slap his hand away.

"Don't touch me!" I yelled angrily now, taking a step away from him, "I hope you do have a soul, so when your existence ends, you go strait to hell!" I screamed. I instantly regretted these words, I had never been so harsh to anyone before. But I couldn't take back what I had said. When I looked at his face, his eyes had turned solid black, his face like stone set into an expression of shock.

"You know…" he whispered, more to himself than to me, but I couldn't take anymore. I turned from him and ran. I didn't stop till I got home, where I flung myself on my bead and cried.

I then understood why people call them manic Mondays.

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Hope you liked it! The future chapters may come more slowly now though, what with school sports strting and everything cough tennis kicks butt! cough Just forewarning you. As always, please review!


	8. Perspective

Twilight and New Moon Belong to Stephenie Meyer.

I would just like to take a second to explain something from the last chapter that many people seemed to be confused about. Edward isn't Brendon, and Edward was not actually present. The power of Bella's memories simply made it seem that way. Sorry if I confused anyone. Anywho, enjoy chapter 8!

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I didn't go to school the next day. When my mom had asked what was wrong, I had told her simply that I fainted in class and wasn't feeling well. She questioned why, but I just told her that the post moving stress must be getting to me. She let me stay home.

All I did was lie in bed, and think about how much of a jerk I was. Brendon had done nothing wrong. I had simply moved in to a town that a vampire lived in, that was not his fault. In kindergarten perspective, he was here first. I had had no right to yell at him like that. He had actually helped me when I was unconscious, but instead of thanks, I had screamed at him.

But the past couldn't be changed, I knew that lesson all to well. And now Brendon was aware that I knew he was a vampire. He had probably moved out of the state by now. There was nothing I could do to fix this.

After wasting an entire day chiding myself, I got up the next morning and went to school. When I got on the bus, some curious eyes watched me. Of course, everyone knew of my little 'talk' with Brendon by now.

Amber, the girl who had spoken to me on my first day, walked up from the back and once again sat in the seat across from me. She crossed her legs in the aisle, and her arms were also crossed in front of her chest. Her face was one of annoyance and disgust. She spit her words at me when she spoke.

"You should know, Brendon Williams isn't in your league. Don't even try to go for him, because if you do, you'll have to deal with me. He's mine."

I should have known that this would be about him. Everything in my life seemed to be centered around him these days. I was a little surprised to hear that he was still around though. I sighed; this was only going to further complicate my life.

"Don't worry Amber, I don't like Brendon. And he more than likely hates my guts right now. Really, he's all yours, take him." I told her. She seemed a little taken aback by my answer. Her face looked stunned for a few seconds before she composed it again.

"Whatever, I just wanted you to know the rules." And she got back up and walked away. I turned and looked out the window. This was going to be _another_ long day.

When I got into homeroom, Stacy walked up. She looked really worried.

"How are you feeling? I tried to call you about a million times yesterday, but no one answered." Had the phone rung? I never even heard it. I must have been too absorbed in my self loathing to notice. I looked a Stacy with a smile.

"Don't worry, I'm fine. I was just feeling really bad yesterday. I'm better now, though." I told her. I wasn't going to say I felt fine, because I didn't, but she didn't need to know all the details.

"That's good! I though you had moved again or something. And I hadn't even gotten to take you shopping yet." And she pouted. It worked, and I laughed. But I knew my happiness wouldn't last for long.

As I walked into first period, he was sitting in his seat, just as I expected. I took a deep breath and walked over. He saw me coming, and stood up, but I held out my hand.

"Don't, please let me just say this first." I started, starring at the ground, "Thank you, for, you know, helping me the other day. That was really nice of you." I paused, and looked up. His face was shaken, but still composed, so I continued.

"And I'm sorry. I had no right to yell at you like that. None of this is your fault, I shouldn't be yelling at you because of my messed up past. That was totally uncalled for, and you have every right to hate me. I understand if you do." I turned away and sat down. He just stood there for a second, and then sat down next to me.

We sat in silence like that for a few minutes. I thought we were finished, but then he turned to me.

"You're wrong." He whispered, and I turned to look at him. His eyes were doing the same unfair smoldering that _his_ eyes used to do, but now they were filled with a sense of determination. "I don't hate you. I don't think I could, even if I wanted to."

I felt my eyes grow wide, and I was about to reply, but Mr. Hardener began his lesson. We went on starring at each other for a few more seconds, then we turned to the front of the room. We both knew this conversation was far from over.

When lunch came around I walked to get some food with Stacy. She was saying something but I was too deep in thought to hear her. I was trying to think of what Brendon had meant when he told me that he didn't hate me. What wasn't there to hate? I screamed at him and basically told him to go die. Then he said he couldn't hate me even if he tried. What did that imply?

"Bella, were you listening?" Stacy said, and I turned to her and shook my head no. She sighed, "Sometimes I wonder where your mind is. I just told you that Brendon is looking at you. I think he wants to talk."

I turned my head around to see him sitting at a table by himself. He smiled at me and waved a hand to the chair next to him. I smiled back then turned to Stacy.

"I'll see you later, okay?" I said and she just giggled and said,

"Knock yourself out."

I rolled my eyes and walked over to Brendon. I sat across from him instead of the seat he had motioned at. He didn't seem to mind. He sat there in the sun sparkling like a diamond, just starring at me with his amber eyes. I remembered another time I had been invited to sit with a vampire, and my breathing became hard, and the hole in my chest began to burn. I wrapped my arms around myself, and tried to forget. Of course, Brendon noticed.

"Are you alright?" he asked, probably thinking another one of Monday's episodes was coming.

"I'm fine," I lied, and quickly thought of a way to change the subject, "So, you're not angry? You know, that I know what you are? I thought that once you figured out that I knew, you would-"

"What, move?" he cut me off with, "No, of course I'm not mad, my family isn't like that. We don't need to be afraid of people knowing. Not that we tell everyone we know, we still try to keep a low profile. But if someone finds out it's not a big deal."

I was trying to find out what he meant. His expression was calm, almost bemused, but his words made no sense.

"How is sitting there glittering and shooting sunbeams into the air keeping a low profile?" I asked, and his eyes grew wide. "And what do you mean people knowing is no big-"

"You can see me?" he asked cutting me off again.

"Of course I can see you, you're sitting right in front of…" his eyebrow raised and I understood what he meant. "Oh, you mean the glittering. Yeah, I can see it. Why, can't everybody else?"

He shook his head, "No, they shouldn't be able to. Well, they can but...well…it's kind of complicated…" he said, with a sympathetic look on his face. I leaned back in my chair and put on a serious face.

"Try me," I said, "Supernatural is my regular."

He laughed and continued, "So I'm guessing you know then, that my kind sometimes have extra gifts, besides the ones that are obvious?" I nodded, so he went on, "Well I must have been a rather convincing human, because my gift is one of perspectives."

My face must have been extremely confused, because he laughed and went on.

"You see, without saying a word, I can change someone's perception of something. If they find something they think is boring or uninteresting, I can influence them, so that suddenly they adore and admire it. Or if they find some action to be dull, I can change their perspective so that it's their new favorite pastime."

"Well then, you must set all the latest fashion trends." I joked. He smiled.

"That is the basic concept."

"But how does that mean that you can sit in broad daylight?" I asked, still confused.

"Well, you see, I just change their perspective. They still see me, but instead of finding me mesmerizing or captivating, they find me dull and uninteresting. My shine doesn't seem at all strange or unusual to them. Some of the more curious I actually have to influence more, to the point where they find me to hideous to look at, much less mention, but they are few and far between."

I listened, in awe, as all the pieces began to fall into place.

" Oh, I get it!" I said, a little too loudly. Some people looked over, so I dropped my voice. "That's what you meant, right? About people knowing not being a big deal? You can just change their perspective so that they think it's fine and ordinary!"

"You catch on quick." He said, a little bemused. I wondered if I should be insulted. "This doesn't freak you out?"

"No, it's actually quite similar to a gift of some one else I knew." I said, remembering Jasper. Boy, was that a dumb idea. Wasn't rule number one to forget the family that I had left behind? I stopped breathing and clutched my chest again, the pain coming back. He sat there looking at me, perhaps waiting for me to say something.

"Why are you telling me all this?" I asked once I was composed, "Is it because you're just going to make me think this conversation was a bad idea and never bring it up again?" I asked. His brow furrowed, and he seemed to be deep in thought.

"No, I wouldn't do that to you. I don't think I could, even if I wanted to."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"For some reason, I don't think I can influence you to do anything. I keep trying, but you never seem to do any of the things that I try to get you to do. The first week I tried countless times to get you to think talking to me was a good idea, but you never did."

"Is that why you kept starring at me in economics?" I questioned. He nodded, then chuckled.

"When you looked over that one time and asked why I was starring, it scared me. I had been trying to get you to talk, and when you did, I wasn't expecting the hostility." I glanced away, embarrassed. He just laughed. "I had wanted you to like me, because you seem…different, from some of the other girls around here. Not just that I can't influence you, but you seem…I'm not sure of the right word… observant, and insightful. Almost as if you understand more of the world than you should."

"Well, I know about your kind. Is that what you mean?" I inquired. He nodded.

"That's part of it. Maybe I could tell from the start that you knew, and that's why I was attracted to you."

"You were attracted to me?" I asked, but then the bell rang and lunch was over, "Wait, you need to tell me about…" but he got up and looked at me with amusement in his eyes.

"Perhaps we should talk more. I want to know more about you. What are you doing this afternoon?" He asked. I was stunned for a second, then collected my thoughts again and replied,

"Nothing, at least I don't think so. My parents don't get home till later, so I'll probably just be watching TV." His answering smile was dazzling.

"Then tell me Bella, have you ever ridden on a motorcycle?"

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Did I answer questions, or just raise more? Please tell me what you think. Even if you hate this story with a passion, tell me why you hate it, so maybe I can fix things. And if you find spelling or grammer mistakes, let me know. Please, please, please review!


	9. Vision

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

I know this update came extremely quickly, even though I did say they wouldn't come as fast, but I keep having those inspiration explosion things, and the chapters end up writing themselves. Hope you're not mad that I lied! Enjoy!

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"But why would she leave?" I mumbled to myself. Alice looked over and rolled her eyes.

"Because you broke her heart. Really, it's not that hard to understand." She glared at me. '_Sometimes you can be such an idio__t Edward'_ She thought. I knew that these word applied to more than just my last statement.

"But why Florida? I mean, what's the point? What's in Florida that she couldn't get in Forks?" I questioned. This time it was Jasper who answered.

"The sun," he said simply. "I know human emotions, and right now she probably wants to be away from anything that reminds her of you. That's more than likely why she left." I sighed and closed my eyes, because I knew he was right.

Sitting here, in Alaska with my family, I still felt all alone. When Alice called and said she didn't know where Bella was, I had immediately returned. I was going to find her, no matter what ridiculous lies I had said. And then I would beg for her to take me back, on my hands and knees if needed. Not soon after, Alice had seen her hugging her mother in an airport, so I knew she was safe, but it bothered me that she had left.

I suppose I had wanted her to stay, so that when I gave up on the useless idea that I could live without her, I would know exactly where to go. Or perhaps Forks just didn't seem like home without her there. What ever the reason, I wanted her to go back. And more than that, I wanted to go back with her.

_'At least this__ means we can move back to Fork.__ Alaska is such a bore.__' _Rosalie thought. I was about to yell at her, but I knew it would do no good, since she had caught sight of herself in a window's reflection, and lost her train of thought.

I knew one thing for sure, I was not returning to Forks, or for that matter any place, until I went to Bella and asked forgiveness. But no, that was stupid. I was protecting her from myself, I shouldn't go back. She deserved to live a normal life without inhuman monsters surrounding her everyday. I repeated that in my head, willing myself not to leave.

I can not go to Bella, she deserves a life. I promised.

Over and over I repeated it. But what about my life? Without her I was nothing, I was more than useless. I chided myself for my stupid, selfish thoughts. It didn't matter what I wanted, or what I got. I had no soul, nothing mattered anyway.

I opened my eyes to see my family sitting around, looking at me, waiting for me to make a decision.

'_Go to her_,' Carlisle thought '_You can't ignore love_.'

'_She is __already __as much my daughter as you are my son__. Go to her._' Esme thought, and the seriousness on her face was almost anger.

'_Stop lying to yourself and just get on a __damn __plane already_." Alice thought. She sat there taping her fingers rapidly on the couch. Jasper, next to her, only nodded. I didn't know what to do. I ran through the option again in my head. Then I started,

"I'm going to -"

But Alice sat up quickly and became very stiff. Her eyes clouded over, and she began to sway slightly. Jasper held on to her, while I saw her vision in my mind.

It was Bella, and she was standing in a parking lot holding a helmet. The sun was shinning, and she looked more beautiful than any memory that I had conjured up. Next to her was a blue motorcycle, and she was talking, with a quite concerned look, to the man who seemed to be the owner of it. Only the owner wasn't a man. He shimmered in the sun, and his eyes were an amber color that sparkled as he smiled at her. He was a vampire, and he was talking to _my_ Bella.

He said something that made her laugh, and though I couldn't hear it, I remembered that laugh with perfect clarity. She put the helmet on, and got on the bike behind the vampire boy, holding onto his waist so she wouldn't fall off. Then they pulled out and drove away. The vision blurred, then was over. I got out of my seat.

"I'm going to Jacksonville." I said, and ran to my room to pack. From downstairs, I listened to Alice fill them in on what we had seen. Suddenly, I heard Emmet yell,

"Hell yeah! Smack down time! Revenge is gonna be sweet!"

And it would be. I didn't know who this vampire was, but he wasn't ever getting near Bella again. I didn't care how long I had to beg, Bella was going to be mine. Because no matter what I said, I would always love her.

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Enter jealous Edward, what will happen next? See that little 'go' button next to 'submit review'? You know you want to push it! And I would really appriciate if you would leave a review if you put this on your favorites or story update list! Thanks!


	10. Pasts Uncovered

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

This chapter took a little longer than usual, because I had to rework how some things were going to happen. Also, I spent an entire day trying to learn how to water ski. Thank you to LaLaLovely47 and barnbum5 who have helped me out with quite a few things.

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"I'm not sure if this is a good idea, Brendon." I said while holding the bike helmet. He had convinced me to come over his house so we could talk more after school. At first I was hesitant, not because he was a vampire, but because he was a guy I had just met. Especially after he said he was attracted to me. But I knew we would need to sort everything out before we could go on with our lives as normal. Not like my life was normal or anything. 

The thing was, Brendon rode a motorcycle. Charlie had hated them, he had seen too many teens recklessly driving on them, thus getting themselves killed. If either of my parents heard I was riding around Jacksonville on the back of a bike, they would freak. I fingered the helmet nervously. Brendon rolled his eyes and sighed.

"Bella, honestly, do you really think _I'm_ going to crash? Truly, I could drive this thing with my eyes closed." He must have seen my shocked face, because he quickly added, "Not that I will, I was only kidding."

"Don't you want a helmet?" I asked. But he just shook his head and chuckled.

"That's the only one I have with me. And if by some force of God we did manage to crash, I think I would actually be in better shape without the helmet than you would be wearing it."

I laughed. "Fine, but if I get in trouble it should be on your conscience." I put the helmet on. He slid on the bike gracefully, and I got on behind him, not quite as stylishly. I think I actually kicked him as I was doing it, but he didn't say a word. As he pulled out, I say Amber glaring at me from across the parking lot. How would I explain this?

But my thoughts were suddenly lost as Brendon peeled out of the parking lot and began to race down the road. Going this fast on a motorcycle was a lot different than going this fast in a car. The wind whipped around me threatening to release the death grip I had around Brendon's waist. The other cars sped by, looking as if they were moving backwards. When we finally did stop at a red light, I released the breath I had been holding. Brendon turned around to look at me.

"Are you alright?" he asked, but his face didn't look concerned, it looked like he was about to burst into laughter. I glared at him, and he must have been able to see through the helmet, because he did laugh. When we took off the next time, he went a little slower, but not much.

When he pulled into a house, I wasn't really surprised to find that it wasn't a house. It was a mansion. Right on the edge of the St. Johns River, it sat with a large lawn around it, unusual in such a populated area. The brick driveway led up to a yellow clay home, a beautiful deck to the left hand side that could be entered through arches. It looked to be only two stories high, but it covered a lot of ground. On the top was a square tower, or perhaps a steeple, that reminded me of a Spanish missionary. The entire area was covered in trees, an every window had a box of beautiful fresh flowers.

Brendon pulled around the back of the house where the river was visible, and it was gorgeous view. He pulled the bike into the garage, where more expensive pieces of machinery were visible. Convertibles, sedans, all cars that I couldn't afford in my wildest dreams. As we got off the bike, which of course was not the only one, and I handed the helmet back to him, Brendon asked,

"So what do you think of my home?"

"It's…charming." I answered. His face was skeptical. "Well what am I supposed to say?! The place is huge, gorgeous, and has a great view! It's practically perfect!" I said, and he laughed. He led me through a door in the garage that entered into the house. He showed me around the rooms. The kitchen, living room, study, den, patio, all of them full of expensive, insanely clean things. I gazed in awe at everything, and noticed everything's size.

"Brendon, this house is huge. How many people live here?" I questioned him.

"No people live here." He said with a wry smile. I hit him on the arm, even though I knew it wouldn't do anything.

"You know what I mean."

"It's just my sister and her husband and me." He said.

"You have this huge house, and only three of you live here?!" I asked, incredulous. He nodded, and I shook my head. Some people led such wanton lives. "Tell me about your family," I said, to change the topic, '"What are they like?"

"Well, my sister, Emmeline, is an interior designer. She's actually quite well known in the Jacksonville area. She did our entire house." He told me as we walked into the living room and sat on the couch. I could tell why she was well known, the place was lovely.

"You two should work together," I said jokingly, "You'd be able to get them to like something even if it was hideous, then have them pay you ten times the amount." He laughed.

"I have suggested it to her before, but she is very opposed to the idea. Emmeline is a very composed and organized person, and the idea of cheating like that seems very wrong to her. Not that it is right in any sense, but making the next fashion trend to have something like a trashcan as a center piece has always been a fun idea of mine." We both laughed at the absurdity of it.

"And her husband, your…brother I suppose?"

"Yes," and he nodded, "Frederick, or Derik as we call him, is my adoptive brother. He and Emmeline found each other almost 60 years ago."

"I'm glad for them," I said, but the idea made the pain start, and I took deep breaths as Brendon continued.

"Derik gives different lectures at the Jacksonville University, and other colleges around the area. Only at night of course. During the day he usually helps Emme with her work."

"Why is the house so insanely clean? It looks like it's some sort of hotel." I said glancing around. He sighed and rolled his eyes.

"That's Emme. Like I said, she's very composed and organized. She must of had OCD or something, because when she's not working, she's cleaning."

"And you? I know so little about you. Are you from America, or somewhere else?"

"Yes, I'm from America. I was born in Baltimore in 1846. That's where I met Derik. We traveled for a while together, and eventually met Emme. With my gift we decided to move here. We knew we wouldn't be bothered by others."

"When did you decide to change your diet?" I asked, trying to make the question sound as normal as possible. His look was questioning, so I added, "You don't kill humans, right?"

"No," he replied, "That was an idea that we all came up with. None of us ever liked the idea of hurting others, so when we moved here, we changed our 'diet'. Not just because we needed to keep a low profile, but because what we were doing seemed wrong."

After that, we sat in silence for a while, as I gazed around the living room. After a while it became very awkward, and I started to get fidgety. When I turned to look, Brendon was staring at me.

"How did you know?" he asked, leaning casually into the couch, "How did you find out about vampires? And how did you know we don't kill humans." his eyes full of confusion and wonder.

"Your eyes," I answered for the last question, "They're not red, they're amber. And as for your existence, well, I knew some…vampires…back in Washington." I answered slowly. This was not a topic that was comfortable to talk about.

"You knew some? Did everyone know about them?" he inquired, his eyes wide.

"No, it was just me." I answered, but the mystified look didn't leave him.

"How come you knew, and everyone else didn't. Why did they tell you?"

I took a deep breath, because I knew I would have to come out with it eventually, even though it would hurt. He would keep prying until I told him everything. I just needed to get it over with.

"I fell in love with one of them, and eventually I found out the truth." His eyes grew wider, and he asked,

"You fell in love with a vampire?" I nodded, and he asked, "Who was he?"

"His name was…was Edward Cullen." I said as quickly as possible, why trying to hold myself together. Saying his name was hard, but I was surprised to find that it didn't hurt as much as before. Not as much, but still enough.

"Did he have a family?" Brendon questioned.

"He had two sisters, two brothers, and an adoptive mother and father." And I watched as he became awe struck.

"So large a family, I never thought that was possible. So then, why did you move to Florida?" he questioned.

"It turned out that…Edward…didn't actually feel the same way about me that I felt for him. So once he and his family were gone, I moved here."

"You wanted to escape your memories of him." Brendon said. It wasn't a question, just a statement of fact. I nodded. His eyes were suddenly filled with ancient understanding and regret.

"It hurts you, to talk about him. You must have cared for him very much. I won't bring him up again, I promise." He said solemnly. I smiled, happy that he understood, and happy that he was willing to be my friend, even if I was broken.

I glanced at the clock. "Renee should be coming home soon," I mumbled to myself, and when I saw him looking at me funny, I added, "She doesn't know I'm here. She can sometimes get a little over the top when she's worrying."

"Well then, how about I get you home?" he offered getting up. "We can continue talking tomorrow, if you want."

"Of course," I told him, and I meant it. "Only, I have one condition."

"What's that?" he said perplexed, as we walked into the garage.

"Can you drive me home in a car? Your driving on the motorcycle kinda freaked me out." His face was stunned for a second, then he broke into a wide grin, and we laughed together.

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Hopefully, this chapter helped you to learn a little more about Brendon. Please review, as always. I got a ton of reviews for the last chapter, and was insanely happy! The people who have constantly reviewed, thank you so much! You rock my socks!


	11. Love

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

This update came pretty quick, but I don't think anyone will really mind. I was going to put it up last night, but my internet recently decided to hate me, so it was being stubborn. Enjoy!

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I waved goodbye to Brendon as he pulled out of my driveway. He had honored my request and driven me home in a car. A shiny, red cobra that attracted attention like moths to a flame. He had only laughed as I tried to duck farther in my seat from embarrassment.

As he disappeared down the street, I walked inside, thankful that no one was home yet. I had no idea how I would have explained this. I walked into my bedroom threw my backpack down on the bed. Then I threw myself onto the comforter and closed my eyes. Maybe I could make sense of everything that had happened.

"And you said my house looks like a hotel. This room looks like a model area in a store."

I sat up instantly, my eyes wide open. Brendon was standing in the corner leaning against the wall of my room looking around, intently taking in his surroundings.

"I mean really, you could have at least changed the bedding or the walls or something. At least then it wouldn't _look_ like your staying in the guest room." He gazed over at me and smiled. I just stared at him like an imbecile, the shock not quite abandoning my body yet. His smile faded and his eyes slowly filled with regret.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. If you want me to leave, I can go." He said.

"No…no, it's okay. You just sort of…surprised me, for a second." I said, pulling myself together. "How did you get in here?" I asked.

"I dropped of my car at my house, then ran through a back route so I wouldn't be seen. When I got here, I jumped over your fence, and then I used your back door. You should lock that, by the way. A fence isn't going to stop a hardened criminal." He said frowning.

"I'll mention that to my mom." I said, my breathing returning to normal. "Not to be rude or anything, but what are you doing here? I thought you said we would talk more tomorrow, not in twenty minutes."

He shrugged, "I guess I was bored, and there's still so much I want to know about you." He walked over and sat on my bed, but not close enough for it to be awkward. But for me it still was. "Tell me more about yourself. I want to know."

"Why do you keep doing that?" I probed. His expression became puzzled.

"Doing what?" he asked.

"Saying things like that. Like at lunch when you said you were attracted to me, and just now saying how you want to know everything about me. Why do you do it?"

He thought for a moment, and then said, "I suppose it's because you're the first person I could be completely honest with since I met my brother and sister. I want to know you, because you seem to already know me."

Okay, that made sense. I was afraid he was going to say something like-

"And also, I think you happen to be very beautiful." He added quite suddenly, confirming my worst fears. He was attracted to me _that_ way. When he saw my hesitant look, he continued, "You don't need to be afraid of me doing anything. I know how you felt about Edward, and-" but I winced as he said his name, and Brendon quickly corrected himself, "how you felt about _him_, and I'm not going to force you into anything. I just want to be friends, nothing more."

That was good. Just friends. Nothing to hurt me, nothing to make the pain start again. Just friends. I smiled at him, and his answering smile was dazzling. He got up and began to walk around the room.

"Tell me about…your favorite color." He said. And the drill began. He asked me about flowers, days of the week, friends, places, vacations, school, classes, cars, colleges, books, music, anything that seemed to pop into his head. When my mom got home, he went on, and didn't change his pace or volume at all. It took a second for me to figure out that it was probably because he was influencing my mother, so that she wouldn't come to check on me. After a while, I interrupted him and said,

"You know, just because you can finish your homework in five seconds doesn't mean the rest of us can." He stopped, and looked at the clock.

"Oh, sorry, I didn't realize that I was taking so long. Can I just have one more question, though?" I sighed and nodded. He held up my photo album.

"Are these your friends from Washington?" he asked, and my face stuck into an expression of shock. When I spoke, I couldn't control the anger in my voice.

"Where did you find that?" I inquired, feeling my mouth turn down into a frown.

"It was tucked in your closet." He saw the intensity of my glare, and suddenly the book was gone. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that, it was wrong of me to bring it up." His face apologetic.

I calmed myself, "No, it's my fault, I shouldn't have freaked out like that. Yeah, those are my old friend from Forks. From before everything…happened." I averted my eyes, and felt the edges of my hole in my heart burn. I closed my eyes and tried to breathe normally. But I could still hear when Brendon asked,

"Was that picture on the first page of _him_?" And then, quite suddenly, it was too much to bear.

I burst into tears, sobs heaving out of my body. I felt like my heart was being ripped apart again, and I wanted to die. All the feelings and memories that I told myself I had forgotten, I had simply stored away, packing them tighter and tighter into my heart and mind. And now, they had burst open, all of them spilling out of me like my tears, a tidal wave of emotions and pain. I didn't even care when I felt Brendon wrap him arms around me. He stoked my hair and whispered to me,

"I'm sorry Bella, I'm so sorry. Never again, I'll never speak of your past again. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Never again, I promise. I won't ever make you cry again. I swear, I promise. I'm sorry…"

Slowly, I felt the sobs subside, and my breathing returned to normal. Brendon released me from his embrace, but held me out in front of him.

"Are you alright? You're not going to faint again are you?" I laughed, but it just sounded weak and gargled. I shook my head, and asked him,

"Can you just go, for tonight. I'll be okay, I just…need to be alone."

He nodded, understanding in his eyes, and he slowly got up.

"I'll see you tomorrow. Sleep well Bella." And then he was gone. I sat there for a few minutes, calming myself down. Then I got up, and dug through my closet. The album was exactly where I had left it, he had replaced it perfectly. I got it down and sat down on my bed with the album on my lap. I took a deep breath and opened it.

I didn't need to go farther than the first page to see his face. Staring into his eyes, I began to realize the truth. The reason why I tried to hide the memories, the reason that when I thought of his name the pain nearly tore me apart. The reason why I broke to hysterics only a few minute ago, simply because he was mentioned.

The truth was that I was still hopelessly in love with Edward.

And once I had told myself that, once I admitted it once and for all, the pain stopped. The throbbing in my heart dulled and a smile crossed my face. Who cares if he doesn't love me anymore, if he never even cared at all. I had loved him, and I still loved him, and there was nothing anyone could do about it.

With my sudden epiphany, I walked over to my desk and pulled out a sheet of paper. I knew exactly what I had to do. I wrote a letter to Edward. I wrote down my feelings, my emotions, my epiphany, everything. And when I was done, I folded it up and placed it in the album. It would never get to him, but just the idea that I had, in a way, told him how I felt made me feel better.

With my new emotional high, I placed Edward's – it didn't hurt to say his name anymore – CD into my computer and played through all his compositions. Then I got out my binders and began my homework. When I was finally done, I ate some dinner, took a shower, changed into my pajamas, then fell asleep to my lullaby.

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What could possibly be written in that letter...hmmmm. I just love to mess with you guys! Please review! You know you want to hit that 'submit' button! Go ahead, do it! Peer presure!


	12. Visitors

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

This chapter is a little shorter that previous ones, I always seem to do that when I change persepectives. Enjoy!

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I lay in my bed, remembering Bella's pathetic laugh as she tried to tell me she was okay. Seeing her like that, so distressed and in pain had hurt me. I had done that to her, I had hurt her, just like _he_ had hurt her. I was no better that that poor excuse for a creature.

I sat up and walked over to my window, looking out onto the river. I had felt her in my arms, held her as she cried. Promised to her that I would never make her cry again. I had told her that I only wanted to be friends, but that wasn't true. I wanted more. I loved her.

I loved the way her face lit up when she figured something out, I loved her blush when I had told her I wanted to know about her, and I even loved the way she had held back about her past. Everything about her seemed perfect; she was everything I wanted in life.

But she didn't feel that way. That jerk, Edward Cullen, had wounded her. He had taken her heart and tore it to shreds. I had seen his face in her album, and I could only look at it in disgust. The idea that any one could be so cruel to someone so seamless was impossible to imagine.

But perhaps I could change that. Perhaps, if she let me, I could heal her. I couldn't simply make her forget, like I would any other. It would take time and patience on my part, but possibly someday, she would feel about me the same way I felt for her. For now, I just had to wait, and be there for her.

Downstairs, I heard the door open as Derik walked in. He had been lecturing somewhere, and didn't get finished until late. When he walked in, he seemed to be talking on a cell phone.

"Of course you could stay here, it would be no problem at all. I haven't seen you in so long, it would be nice to catch up in person." He paused, seemingly to hear something that the other person was saying.

"There are going to be seven of you?" he asked incredulously, "Goodness Carlisle, what have you been doing the past hundred years? Of course it's no problem, though. Alright…two days…Well then, I'll see you then. Yes, we'll pick you up from the airport, of course…okay, then…Goodbye."

"Who was that?" Emme asked as I walked downstairs. Of course, she had a broom in her hand, and was placing it in a closet.

"An old friend of mine. His name is Carlisle Cullen, remember, I told you about him before. I met him before I joined up with you, Brendon." He added when he noticed me at the bottom of the stairs. "He's like us, vegetarian, and he and his family live up in Washington. They're coming to Florida and need a place to stay. I said they could bunk here. They'll be here in two days."

"Oh, guests! This is going to be so much fun!" Emme rejoiced. "I'll have to clean the guest rooms out!" She said, and ran upstairs.

"What…what did you say…his name was?" I asked, hoping that I had heard wrong.

"Carlisle Cullen," Derik repeated, "He's a doctor, an interesting occupation, but he's somehow mastered his thirst." He said while putting away his briefcase. Could these be the same Cullens? The numbers matched, they were from Washington, and they had the same name. So these were the Cullens who had hurt Bella.

"What are they coming to Florida for?" I asked, unable to hide the bitterness in my voice. Derik didn't seem to notice.

"He said something about his son trying to find someone. Said his name was…oh what was it..Edwin, no…um, Eddie…"

"Edward." I said, the hatred leaking out of my speech like gravity had pulled it. "I need to go somewhere." I said, grabbing my coat as I walked out.

Derik didn't question, his face just held a puzzled look as I stormed out the door. It didn't matter to me what he thought. All that mattered was that the Cullens were coming here, and Edward was coming back to hurt Bella. I couldn't let that happen. I promised I would never hurt her again, and sitting by when I knew this would happen would definitely hurt her. As I ran through the night, I thought about what I had to do.

It was time to change someone's perspective.

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I am a tyrant, aren't I? Sorry, but I just love to write cliffhangers! As always, please review! I will answer questions, but not f they are going to give anything away.


	13. Arrival

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

This chapter is longer than most of my others, so some of you should be very happy. I recently passed the 100 review marker, and I almost died with joy. You all have been so great! Thank you a thousand times over! Hope you enjoy this chapter!

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I sat on the plane holding Jasper's hand. Edward next to me couldn't seem to sit still. His fingers were drumming on the arm rest with amazing speed. His foot had been taping uncontrollably earlier, so I supposed this was an improvement. 

Jasper continuously tried to calm his nerves, but every time he did so, Edward would growl at him without even looking over. Jasper stopped after the seventh try.

I sighed. This flight seemed to take forever. Edward didn't seem to understand that the rest of us were just as worried about Bella as he was. She was already a sister to me, and the fact that Edward had left her without letting me say goodbye made me mad. And now, she had found new friends to be with. Maybe she wouldn't want me as her sister anymore. I wondered if something was happening between her and this vampire, could they possibly be-"

"If you think 'in love', I swear I will rip you to shreds Alice." Edward mumbled, staring out the window.

"Sorry." I muttered back, but really, I wasn't.

When we landed in Jacksonville, we found a waiting party for us. Carlisle had told us about an old friend of his who he had met shortly before changing Edward. Apparently his name was Frederick Williams, and he worked as a teacher for some colleges. They had met that way, and had both been investigating the forms of our alternative 'diet'. Carlisle said they had a house here, but I'm not quite sure how they managed that.

As we walked up, I could see him in the crowd. He was tall, and his hair was a light blond, almost white, but not in a way that made him seem old. He appeared to be in his early thirties, much like Carlisle, but we had been told he was actually a little over two hundred and fifty. It was apparent as we approached him, that Frederick was no longer a loner. On his arm was a beautiful copper haired woman, slightly shorter than Frederick was. Her outfit was perfect, and fit her body shape nicely.

"Only you would notice someone's fashion sense at a time like this." Edward muttered to me. I glared at him and hissed under my breath.

Frederick and Carlisle approached each other and embraced. We all exchanged pleasantries, and we found out that the women with Derik, as he preferred, was named Emmeline, or Emme as she preferred. They had two cars waiting outside, and we all piled in. Edward chose the car without Jasper and I, probably because he didn't want Jasper trying to calm him down anymore.

Emme was driving, talking to Esme who was sitting next to her in the front. Rosalie, who for some strange reason agreed to come with us, was sitting next to me in the back, with Jasper on the other side. Rose was more than likely still mad that Emmett had convinced her to come. We drove through Jacksonville in the middle of the night, and I looked around at all the new sites.

Suddenly, I felt a vision coming on, so I grabbed Jasper's hand. Everything became blurry, then what I saw shocked me.

It was the vampire who had been with Bella. He was talking to Bella's mom, and her eyes were very wide, and she was very still. Suddenly, the vision changed, and instead of Bella's mom, it was me he was talking to. I saw that he was somehow doing the same thing to me. I was still and motionless, my expression blank and unemotional. I saw my lips moving, but I couldn't hear what I was saying. Then the vampire boy smiled and the vision was over.

I heard Jasper next to me, "Alice, are you okay? Alice, what did you see?" I realized I was shaking, and I quickly shook my head to get rid of the feeling. I smiled at him.

"I'm fine, Jasper, don't worry. It was just the same vampire talking with Bella. Nothing new." I lied to him. I didn't want him to get worried about me, and I didn't want him to tell Edward. I had to handle this myself.

"But then what was with the shaking?" Rose asked. I had to think quick.

"It's just…you know…seeing Bella with someone else. It's odd…" They seemed satisfied with that.

When we got to their house, it was, of course, lovely. Emme explained her job as a designer, and gave us a tour of the home. She showed us to our guest rooms, and everyone unpacked and gathered downstairs. There was an awkward silence for a moment, then Carlisle started.

"Thank you for letting us use your home, Derik." And Derik nodded back as acknowledgement, "My son, I believe, has something to ask you."

We all looked at Edward. He sat alone in a chair, hunched forward with his hands clasped together, his head resting on them. When his name was spoken, he didn't acknowledge it in any way. After a minute, he looked up and turned his gaze on Derik and Emme.

"Recently, I made on of the worst mistakes of my life. I left the girl I love to protect her from what we are. She moved here of late, I suppose to escape the memories of myself I left behind. My sister Alice," and at this point he inclined his head towards me, "has the ability to foresee events in the future. A few days ago, she saw her, Bella, here in Jacksonville with another vampire. I came here to make sure she's safe, and to ask her apology for my serious misjudgment."

Emme and Derik just sat there listening, and as they heard the story, their eyes grew wide. Edward continued,

"I was wondering if there were any other vampires that you knew of in this area. Perhaps it could make my job of finding him much easier. I would like to speak with him, before I confront Bella." They looked at each other, then back at Edward.

"I'm sorry, but other than the two of us, I don't think it's possible for a rouge vampire to live in Jacksonville. Sorry that we can't help."

The entire family looked down at the floor. But Edward simply stared our hosts, his gaze growing inquiring. Suddenly, he asked,

"Who's Brendon?" We were all stunned for a second, Emme and Derik most of all. They looked at Edward, and then Emme, her face a blank slate, answered in a monotone voice.

"We don't need to talk about Brendon." The entire family was perplexed. I was as well, until I looked at both of their faces. I remembered that face. It was the same face that I had seen on Bella's mother, and the same face I had seen on myself. This Brendon was the same one who had done something to me in that vision. But what?

Unexpectedly, Edward had Derik's shirt in his hand, and was lifting him off the floor. His eyes were black, and when he spoke, he shouted the words with menace.

"What has he done with Bella?!" Derik kept the same blank face.

"We don't need to talk about Brendon." But Edward wasn't having that. He roared and launched Derik across the room into a wall. He hit it head first, and crumpled to the floor.

"Edward, what do you think you're doing?!" Carlisle cried, dashing over to restrain Edward. Emmett quickly assisted him.

"Derik!" Emme screamed, as she broke from her trance and ran over to her husband.

"Oh, my" Derik said as he was getting up. "What just happened?" he glanced over at us, "And why are you holding onto Edward like that?" Carlisle was about to explain, but Edward cut him off,

"Tell me who the hell Brendon is or I'll tear you to pieces!" he yelled as he struggled against Emmett's grip on his arm.

"Brendon? How do you know Brendon?" Derik asked. Suddenly, Emme's face became a blank slate again.

"We don't need to talk about Brendon." She repeated, and Derik's face went from confusion to horror.

"Oh no…did he…no…he wouldn't have…would he?"

Edward had seemed to calm a little, he was no longer struggling. All of us just stood there and stared at the scene. Derik looked at his wife's face, still emotionless, and covered his own face with his hands.

"I can't believe he would do this to us!" he brought his fist down on the floor, "That boy is going to get it if he ever shows his face here again. I just can't believe this!"

"Derik, what's happened?" Carlisle asked, releasing Edward.

"My brother, or I suppose adopted son, Brendon, has apparently decided to move." He said, disgusted. When he saw the mystified looks from my family, he continued, "How do I explain…Brendon has the amazing ability to change how a person views thing. He doesn't control them, per say, but instead…convinces them to see things in a certain light. We had an agreement that he would never use it on a family member, but it seems that he's forgotten that rule."

"But why would he use it on you now?" Esme asked.

"I'm not sure, but I suppose he wanted us to forget about him for some reason. Maybe so that we wouldn't let you know about him. How did you know about him, by the way?" He questioned. Edward, with is now free arm, tapped his head.

"I read minds" he stated, and Derik nodded.

"That would do it." He said, getting up. Emme's face was slowly returning to normal.

"We don't need to talk about Brendon." She said again, but this time it sounded more like a question. Derik shook his head.

"This should wear off in a few hours. With enough talk about him, she should be okay." He lead her over and sat her down in a chair.

"That still doesn't explain anything." Edward rudely stated. "If he did anything to Bella-"

"I don't believe that he would harm your Bella in any way. He spoke briefly of her to me, and I remember he spoke of her as a friend. I can see no reason that she would be in any danger."

"Would he try to kidnap her?" I asked, and suddenly every eye in the room was on me.

"Why would you think that?" Derik asked.

"I had a vision on the way here. Brendon was talking to Bella's mother, and she had that blank stare on her face that you had on a moment ago. Maybe he was convincing her to let him take Bella." I didn't mention my part in this vision No need to worry any one more than they already were. Edward grew even paler than usual.

"That could be a possibility…" Derik thought to himself. Edward began to walk to the door.

"Where do you think you're going?" I shouted at him. He was halfway out the door, when he answered,

"To find Bella." And then he was gone. We all stood very still for a moment, then Carlisle took charge.

"Emmet, Rose, Jasper, you're coming with me. We're going after Edward to make sure he doesn't do something rash. Esme, Alice, you stay here in case he comes back. Let's go. Derik, you stay with Emme." Then the room was suddenly missing four people.

"I'm going to go outside and watch the area around the house." I said. Esme nodded and I left the room.

Outside, the night air was cool. I circled the house a few times to get a layout. Then perched myself on the roof and waited. After a few minutes, I heard a sound behind me. I got up and turned around, saying,

"Well, I see you came to your senses. Don't you know that you-" But then I noticed it wasn't Edward. It was Brendon.

His eyes locked on mine, and he said slowly,

"You don't need to worry about Bella."

"I don't need to worry about Bella." I repeated, unable to control myself.

"Bella is going to be okay, now that you aren't with her."

"Bella is going to be okay, now that I'm not with her." I said. That was right wasn't it? We were only making her life dangerous.

"You don't need to look for Bella, she's just fine."

"I don't need to look for Bella, she's just fine." And that was right. Bella was okay, Brendon would protect her. I didn't need to try to find Bella. She was safe. Brendon smiled, then disappeared into the night.

I turned around and was suddenly aware of my surroundings. How long had I been on this roof? What was I doing up here? I got down and walked back into the house.

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Yay cliffhangers! You all must hate me so much right now...but thats okay! Please review! Critisim, good points, queries, even telling me that I spelled something wrong is great (and helpful). I'm sure you have questions, feel free to ask! A hundred more reviews would be the most amazing thing ever! Not all in one chapter of course, I'm not that crazy...or am I?


	14. Concern

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

This chapter is much longer than others, so many of you should be very happy. This should explain some things that happened last chapter, that some people seemed to be very angry about... Enjoy!

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**_The day before-_**

My last night's epiphany had me waking with a smile on my face. My overly loud alarm clock didn't bother me at all. I didn't even slam on the snooze button. I practically skipped to the bathroom to take my shower. When I was done and dressed, I went downstairs and had myself some delicious cheerios. I heaped on sugar with a smile, and even read the back of the box. Yes, it was that kind of wonderful morning.

When my mother came downstairs, she looked a little grumpy. My mother was never a morning person, but today she seemed really out of it. When I greeted her with a pleasant 'good morning' she just grumbled and started poring cereal. I didn't pester her any further.

After I had finished and cleaned my dishes, I grabbed my backpack and headed for the door. The bus came a few minutes to late, so I spent the time humming one of Edward's songs. It felt so good to be able to think his name without a horrible pain starting. Now, when I thought of him, I only remembered the good times, so it didn't hurt.

My good mood was temporarily ruined when I saw who was sitting in my usual seat on the bus. Her bleach blond hair was like a warning sign, cautioning of the evil that lurked within her. Amber sat there, her arms folded across her chest, and the thought 'if looks could kill' was all I could think of when I saw her face.

But this wasn't enough to completely spoil my mood. I walked up at sat in the seat across the aisle.

"Good morning, Amber." I said with a smile. Her glare darkened, if that was possible.

"Don't 'good morning' me. I thought I told you the rules." She spat out at me.

"Actually, you never really gave me any actual rules. You just told me that I couldn't go out with Brendon. And I'm not. So I haven't broken any rules. But of course I couldn't break them since you didn't give me any." I said smiling. She seemed dazed for a second, trying to understand what I said in her small little brain, I suppose. Then she became even angrier.

"Stop being such a smart ass. You know what I mean. I saw you riding on his motorcycle yesterday. He's never let anyone ride with him before."

"Oh really? How interesting. Have you ever asked before? I'm sure he'd let you, he's very nice." I said innocently. She scowled and looked away. "Oh, so you have asked! But if no one's ever ridden with him, you must have been rejected!"

"Shut up!" she yelled, and earned herself a glare from the bus driver. "Just back off, okay? Or you'll be sorry!" and she got up and stormed to the back of the bus with her friends. Score one for team Bella.

At school, we all filed inside, and I saw Amber run over to her friends. She started pointing at me and I think I actually saw a tear. How juvenile.

"What are you looking at?" I heard a velvet voice ask. I turned to see Brendon at my side, smiling down at me.

"Just some of your fan girls gossiping. I was threatened today because of you, you know. You are a horrible influence in my life." I replied. His face became worried.

"Threatened? By who?" he asked, with real concern in his voice. I pointed as we started to walk.

"Amber. Apparently she thinks your reserved…for herself of course." He was surprised for a moment, then chuckled.

"She never did get message that I didn't like her. Perhaps she should develop a new found hatred towards me…" I gaped at him. "What?" he asked.

"You wouldn't really do that, would you? Just change someone's opinion on a whim." He shook his head.

"No, I'm not that cruel. I only use it out of necessity. My family also has strict rules on using it at home."

"Make's sense. Or else you'd probably have every sport car on this side of the globe." He just laughed, then looked at me questioningly for a minute. Eventually, he stated,

"You seem a lot better…from when I left you last night. Are you sure you're okay?"

"Don't worry, I feel a hundred and ten percent better." I retorted grinning. His look was unconvinced. I shrugged, "I had an epiphany last night."

"An epiphany? About what?" he questioned as the bell rang.

"Love, of course!" I replied as I walked into homeroom, leaving him with a look of complete bewilderment.

The rest of the morning passed without a hitch. My classes seemed to whiz as I jotted down notes, answered questions, and doodled little hearts on the side of my papers. When lunch came around, Stacy had already asked me about my 'date' with Brendon, which was apparently the new rumor around school.

"Are you guys actually dating?" she asked tentatively. I shook my head.

"Nope, it's only a rumor. We're just friends." She nodded.

"I thought so. He seems to really like you though." I gave her a puzzled expression, and she rolled her eyes, "Come on, Bella, you have to see the way he looks at you sometimes." I just kept starring at her as she pushed me toward his table in the cafeteria. He seemed to be waiting for me. I sat down and opened my lemonade.

"How has your day been?" he asked, "Any more epiphanies?" I just laughed.

"No, just a regular day." I answered, "And you?"

"Nothing to important has happened, but I have heard some rather interesting rumors. Apparently there is a rather large scandal that the two of us have created."

"Oh, you heard it too?" I replied. "Sorry, I didn't know this would happen. I was sort of just trying to annoy Amber, but I guess she took it the wrong way. I told her we weren't dating but I guess she-"

"Stop apologizing. I really don't mind." He said with a smile.

Something strange started to worry me than. What Brendon had said last night about thinking I was beautiful. How Stacy had said that he looked at me in a certain way. Just now how he had said that he didn't mind if people thought we were dating. Did Brendon actually have feelings for me? Was that even possible, seeing as we had only met a few days ago?

But I knew it was possible. Hadn't I fallen for Edward after our first meeting? Love at first sight was something I knew all to well. But Brendon knew about my past. He wouldn't try to do anything. Besides, he had said that he only wanted to be friends, right? Apparently I had been thinking for most of the lunch period, because suddenly the bell rang. I glanced back at Brendon.

"Sorry, I really spaced out there." He just laughed.

"Its fine, I don't mind. Do want a ride home today? I doubt you want to get back on the bus with Amber." He asked sincerely.

I doubted for a moment. Perhaps he did have feelings for me, then what did accepting this offer mean. But I quickly erased that reaction. He was right, riding the bus with Amber and her friends was a really bad idea. So I nodded and said, "Sure, sounds good." And his answering smile was dazzling.

After school, I once again donned his helmet, and got onto his motorcycle. I managed not to kick him this time, which I was thankful for. We pulled out and drove home too fast, and I handed him back his helmet and thanked him for the ride.

When I got into my room, I was almost expecting him to be there. He wasn't of course, and I breathed a sigh of relief. I turned on Edward's CD and started my homework. When my mom got home, I finished up the last of my history, and headed downstairs to cook some dinner. She had the same look on that she had this morning, and I decided to question it.

"Hey mom, you look sort of out of it. Are you feeling alright?" she glanced over, seemingly pulled from a distant thought.

"No, it's nothing, honey. I'm fine." But the look didn't leave her face.

"Mom, something is obviously bothering you. What is it?" I asked glaring at her and putting as much authority into my voice as possible. She looked at me, then sighed in defeat.

"It's your dad, I'm worried about him." She told me.

"Who, Phil? What, is he sick?" I inquired. She shook her head.

"No, not Phil, Charlie. I called him last night." I dropped my spatula.

"You called Charlie?! What for?" I practically choked out. My mother and Charlie were not on the best terms. They hardly ever spoke when they didn't need to. The fact that she had called him of her own free will was hard to understand. The idea that she was concerned about him was even more astounding.

"I don't know…I was worried about him. You had been living with him for so long, I guess I figured he might be having a hard time adjusting. He sounded really bad on the phone, and you know how old he's getting. His health isn't the best anymore. I just hope he's going to be okay…" she mused.

I was petrified. Charlie was sick. Because of me, he was sick. That hit me hard. I had never even thought of his feeling when I decided to leave. Now, he was ailing because I had been selfish and left. I felt horrible. My good mood was officially gone.

I thought about that for the rest of the night. Even when I was sleeping, I had horrible dreams about being at his funeral and crying my eyes out. When I woke up, it seemed I had been actually crying in my sleep. I got ready with a little less pep that morning, even though it was a Friday.

When I headed out the door to catch the bus, I found a shiny blue corvette waiting for me. Leaning against the passenger side was Brendon. When he saw me he smiled.

"Thought you might like a ride to school today," he said opening the passenger door. I gave him a weak smile and got in. I was too depressed to think what implications this might have. As we drove to school at a speed I knew was over the speed limit, but was too miserable to look, Brendon asked,

"Are you alright? You don't seem so good." I sighed and looked out the window.

"It's my dad, Charlie. I never told you about him, did I?" He shook his head.

"You mentioned him at some point, I think. But you never really went into detail."

"He's my father, him and my mom divorced when I was a kid. He lives in Washington, where I used to live with him." I said, still distant. We were sitting in the school parking lot now.

"Is he alright?" Brendon asked with concern. I shook my head, and I could feel tears coming.

"He's really sick. My mom called him, and ever since I left…I don't now, I guess he got lonely, and I never thought that my leaving would harm him so much, but it seems like he was hurt by it, and now he's sick, and it's all my fault…" my words had involuntarily sped up, and the tears were streaming down my face now.

"Don't cry," I heard Brendon say as he began to stroke my hair. I looked up at him and he wiped a tear off my face. "He'll be okay. We'll figure something out. Don't worry." Then he smiled at me, and I couldn't help but smile back.

"Thanks Brendon…you're a good friend." I said to him after drying my face. For a second it looked like he was disappointed by what I said, but it was a fleeting expression as he gave me a warm gaze and said, "Anytime."

The rumor of our 'relationship' was still floating around, so we received many a strange glance as we got out of his car and walked into the school. The fact that my eyes were red from crying was certainly not helping the situation.

After my first few periods, I felt a little better. Brendon's words helped me to hope that there was a way I could fix this. I just had to think of how.

I sat with Brendon again at lunch, much to the wary gazes of people passing by and a few interesting looks from my friends. When I sat down, Brendon had a bright look in his eyes.

"I found a way that you might be able to make your dad feel better."

"What?" I asked enthusiastically. Anything that could fix this had to be a good idea.

"Go visit him in Washington." Well, anything but _that_ idea.

"I'm not sure if you noticed, Brendon, but I'm a jobless high school student with no income. How are you expecting me to buy a plane ticket? We're not all rich megalomaniacs." He rolled his eyes and sighed.

"I would buy the tickets, Bella. I'm not going to make you pay for it. What kind of friend do you think I am?" I was stunned for a moment.

"So, then…you'd be…coming with me?" He sighed again.

"Do you take me for a complete savage? Of course I'd go with you, I'm not letting you fly cross country alone. I mean, really Bella."

"That's okay with you? Just visiting Forks on a whim like that?" I asked. He just shrugged,

"It is the weekend." He argued. I was taken aback for a second, then shook my head.

"Did you even think this out? I mean, problem one, I'm never going to get my mother to agree to this. Problem two, I'm not letting you pay for a plane ticket and fly across the country just to see if my dad's alright. And problem three…"

"Problem three?" he asked when I stopped.

"I'm not sure if I'm ready to go back yet." I whispered, gazing at the ground. I knew that I loved Edward, and nothing was going to change that. Despite the fact he didn't care about me anymore, I could still love him all I wanted. Instead of trying to deny and forget, I accepted and loved. This thought had gotten me by and stopped the pain. But was I so confident in my epiphany that I was ready to return to the place that held all the memories of him, all the memories behind me?

I felt Brendon's hand on my shoulder, and I looked up. "It's okay Bella," he said, "Your one of the most courageous people I know. I know you would be strong enough."

"But what about problems one and two?" I questioned. He leaned back and smiled.

"Problem two, I'm not going to let you worry about. What's the use of having money if you're not going to use it to help others? And as for problem one...well, I am a rather convincing person." That brought me back to reality.

"No way! Uh-uh, forget it! There is no way you are brainwashing my mom! Nope, that's out of the question." I denied him, "And I thought you said you only use that out of necessity?"

"This is a necessity, your father's sick." He said, with actual concern. That got me thinking. But I just shook my head.

"Nope, still don't like the idea." And I crossed my arms and closed my eyes. This was final. He sighed,

"Maybe you could just ask her, she might say yes. Or, just give her the excuse that you're staying over someone's house for the weekend. She wouldn't know any better."

"Oh, so instead of brainwashing her, now you want me to lie to her?" I came back with.

"Yep, that's the general idea." He said very offhand.

"That actually might…no, what am I saying?! I'm not doing that. And even if I did, I'm a horrible liar, it would never work."

"Think it over," he said as the bell rang, "The options always open to you."

I mused over it for the rest of the day. Much to Brendon's dismay, I decided to go home on the bus. I didn't want him giving me any more good logic that favored his idea. Throughout the day it had been sounding better and better. I knew I had to do something to help Charlie, and this was the best possible way. If he saw me happy, then he would be alright, I was sure of it.

So that night, after I had finished my homework, I packed my clothes, and called Brendon.

"Hello, Bella," Brendon answered.

"How did you know it was me?" I asked, momentarily stunned.

"There was this marvelous invention called caller id that revolutionized-"

"Okay, I get the point."

"So what can I do for you?" he asked after he finished laughing.

"I've been thinking, and…I'll agree to let you take me to Forks."

"Great, I knew you'd say yes. What are you telling your mom?"

"Brendon, did you know that you have a sister?"

"No, I wasn't aware of that."

"Well you do. And she and I are the bestest of friends. I just received an email from her. She wants me to stay the weekend with her at the beach. You have a beach house, you know."

"How convenient, we actually do."

"I should have known. Anyway, it's just going to be the two of us, and since it's so close she doesn't have to worry about me at all. The people in there before us didn't lock up, so we're leaving right now. So hurry up and get over here before I change my mind."

"Won't your mom notice that I'm not a girl?"

"You don't have to actually come into the house. I'll just run out and meet you. My mom's not usually worried about details."

"Okay, I'll just have to get some things together. I'll see you in a few."

"Bye." And I hung up.

My clothes were packed, so I sat down at my desk. I needed to compose myself before trying to lie to my mother. A blank piece of paper was lying there, so I picked up a pencil. I wrote down-

_'I'm going to Forks. Perhaps you'll be there Edward, in every memory I find.' _

I folded it, and placed it in the album, next to my first letter. It felt good to write my feelings out, and to get this off my chest. It felt like placing this next to his picture was actually telling him, like the picture and the person were connected somehow. The part I didn't add was how I wasn't sure if those memories would rip me to shreds or only fill me with more false hope. I took a deep breath, and headed out to tell my mom.

She believed me of course. I supposed I was a better liar than I had thought, or that my mother was just so exhausted from her days work, and so excited that I had made a friend that she really didn't care. Brendon pulled up as soon as I was done talking, so she couldn't ask any questions. I ran out of the house after a quick hug and I threw a wave as I ran out the door.

He had brought the blue corvette again, and I threw my bag into the trunk and jumped into the passenger side quickly. We pulled out and merged into the traffic. Brendon suddenly hit his head with his hand.

"Damn, I forgot my wallet! How dumb can I get?!" He cried. He quickly pulled onto a side road, and down a few streets. He parked the car and said "Stay here, I'm going to go back and grab my wallet. I won't be long."

I waited for a few minutes, and felt the drowsiness start to take over. I knew I probably wouldn't stay awake through the flight, much less this car ride. Brendon returned, and after a quick apology which I didn't really hear, he pulled out and sped toward the airport.

* * *

Well, my job of torturing you is done. Just kidding, of course, I would never do it on purpose (or would I?) I recieved some wonderful, as in violent, reviews about Brendon, so I'm sure you all love him so much more now!

PLEASE review!!! I have stated before that I don't like people who need a certain number of reviews to continue, but the more reviews I get, the more incentive I have to write faster. And with school starting soon I'm not sure when I'll have time to write. REVIEW!


	15. Letter

Twililght and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer

School sucks. Period. Whoever invented it deserves to be thrown in hole with some cherrios and forgotten about for the rest of their miserable existance. So there. And if you can't figure it out, that's the reason this is coming so late. Sorry a thousand times over! I've already got the next two chapters written, so they should come quickly. Enjoy!

* * *

I ran from the house. It was her fragrance that I had smelled here. When I had walked in, I wasn't sure if it was just my anxiety or something else that was causing me to have delusions of her scent. But after that interesting series of events, I know she had been in that house. Now, as I followed her scent through the darkened city, that fact only made me run faster.

As I was running, I was suddenly knocked off my feet. When I tried to get up, a strong arm held me from making an escape, but was not restricting me otherwise. Emmett's grasp only clenched tighter as I struggled. Carlisle ran up, followed by Rose.

"Carlisle, we can't just stand here, that freak has Bella, and he's-"

"I know Edward, but you need to calm down and think reasonably. Did you think of the consequences of barging into Bella's home in the middle of the night? How do you think she would react to that?" He told me. I hung my head.

"But we can't leave her, what if this Brendon is dangerous?" I tried to argue, but my voice sounded weak.

"I'm not saying that you shouldn't go to see Bella, that's actually exactly what you should do. But I am saying that you shouldn't let Bella see you. Not until we distinguish what the danger is."

I knew the danger he spoke of could be seen in different views. The most obvious was Bella's impending danger of this vampire Brendon. But the other was the danger I would be in, if I saw what Alice had been thinking of earlier.

What if I found Bella had moved on, what if she was truly happy? Worse than that, what if I found that Bella was in love with someone else? This of course had been the whole point in leaving her, to let her live a life where she could love someone who didn't have the urge to kill her with every touch, or the lust for her blood with every kiss. Still, if I saw this, I'm not even sure how I would react. But I know that my heart, though it hasn't beat once in over a hundred years, would shatter into a million pieces.

I didn't even want to think that she could be in love with Brendon. That, I knew, was impossible.

"You're right," I said to Carlisle, defeated, "We'll just go to see her. I promise, I won't let her see me." My head was hanging in devastation.

Carlisle nodded, then we began to run again. I lead the way, Bella's scent so much more powerful to me than it was to the others. When we arrived at her house, I stood inside her back yard as I watched the cars go by, stopping at the light. Green truck, red sedan, blue porche, silver truck. They all pulled out when the light turned green. All I wanted was to be in one of those cars with Bella, and to drive away from this place.

We snuck up to Bella's window on the second floor and looked in. No lights, no people. I slowly opened the window and snuck inside. This room had Bella's scent all over it. I looked in the closet, but was surprised to find very little clothes in it. Either Bella wore the same outfits everyday, or she had packed before she left.

But that didn't make any sense. How could she have packed if she was kidnapped? I looked around the rest of the room. The bed was made, and the desk was cleaned off. There was only one object on it. I recognized it from what seemed so long ago.

It was Bella's photo album, and I remembered it because it nearly tore my heart out when I removed my pictures from it. I walked over and picked it up. When I opened it, I found to folded pieces of paper in the front, blocking the pictures. When I picked them up, I saw my face.

Bella had found my photos. She had taken them with her when she left. That meant that she didn't hate me, right? If she had taken these memories with her, then she surely must have wanted to remember me.

But I quickly dismissed that thought. If I didn't get my hopes up, they could never be dashed. I placed the album on the table, along with the second piece of paper, and opened the first. I was surprised to see my name.

_Dear Edward,_

_When you left, I thought that my life had no more meaning. I thought that the ache from the emptiness would burn through my heart everyday, only to heal, and then be ripped apart at the next memory of you. I left Forks to escape __those__ memories, for I thought that they were only full of lies and pain._

_But I found that this isn't true. I now value the memories of you, for I remember the good times. The times where you held my hand, or __I __felt your lips on my hair. I realized that even if you no longer cared for me, I could love you with no consequence. It doesn't matter that you have no feelings in __return,__you can't take my feelings from me. An__d with that, I felt the pain leave_

_You will never get this letter, but I feel as if I am letting you know how I feel. Perhaps someday, we will meet by chance, and I can tell you how I feel, and let you know that I will always love you. When I die, I will wait for you in heaven. If I find that they would not let you in, then I would wander in the dark, waiting for you. If I had to pick a way to spend an eternity, it would have to be with you, our hands clasp together. Besides, it's not heaven without you, now is it?_

_With love always and forever,_

_Bella_

The mind slowed. If my heart was still beating, then it would have stopped. All reason was abandoned at that moment. Reality didn't matter anymore; I was floating on my own level of consciousness.

Bella still loved me. She loved me enough to deny entrance to heaven. She loved me even though she thought I didn't love her. But I did love her, oh yes I did. The only way that this moment could have been better was if Bella was standing next to me, he hand wound in mine.

Carlisle came into the room then. He saw me holding the letter, just staring at it, with a shocked look on my face.

"Edward, what's happened?" he whispered. '_Please, oh Lord, don't let__ it be a suicide note…__'_he thought.

I turned my attention to him, and my face broke out into a huge grin. I laughed, something I hadn't done in a long time. I laughed without holding back, and ran over to him and embraced him. Then I let myself fall on the floor and stare at the ceiling, the smile never leaving my face.

"Edward, you need to be quiet, Bella's parents will hear." Carlisle told me sternly. '_Oh, God, he'__s finally lost it. He's gone insane.' _He thought appalled. I jumped up and ran over to him, holding onto his arms, shaking him.

"Yes, Carlisle! I am insanely thrilled! I have never been so…so…relieved, joyful, ecstatic in my entire life!" I thrust the paper in his hands, "Read, and you can share in my joy!" I practically yelled, and spun in a circle away from him.

His eyes moved back and forth as he read the paper, and his face lit up with our shared happiness. But then his face slowly fell again.

"What about Brendon?" he asked, and my joy left almost as quickly as it had come. I had been so blinded by the fact that Bella still loved me, that she would accept me if I came back to her, that I had forgotten the imminent danger that loomed over her.

"Her mother…" I said, turning around. I snuck down some stairs to see her parent sitting in the living room. I scanned her mother's mind, searching for clues, then returned upstairs.

"Bella is apparently at a sleepover at the beach. That would explain the missing clothes…" I said, walking over to the closet. Carlisle was holding the paper still, but after a double take, I noticed it was the second piece that I had left on the desk.

'_Forks, but why would she_-' Carlisle thought, but I cut him off.

"What does it say?" I asked, walking over to him. He handed to note to me. I read the words in Bella's script.

_'__I'm going to Forks. Perhaps you'll be there Edward, in every memory I find.__'_

The sleepover was a lie. Brendon must have convinced her mother that Bella was only going somewhere with a friend, then kidnapped her. But how would she know she was going to Forks? And how did she have time to write a letter? All these questions ran through my head, but I knew one thing was certain. I turned to my father.

"Carlisle, we're going back to Forks."

* * *

Cliffhanger! Sort of... the next chapter will be coming extrememly quickly, if not tonight, then tommorow morning. Depends on how much of a reaction I get. Hit the little 'Go' button, you know you want to... :-P


	16. Flight Plan

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

So I know I said I'd put this up this morning, but I sorta slept in till after twelve...you can't blame me, I've woken up at 5:45 for the past six days! But I did wake up, and I did put up the chapter! Here it is, enjoy!

* * *

When we returned to Derik's house, we found Alice and Esme sitting in the living room.

"Where's Derik and Emme?" Carslile asked.

"Upstairs. Emme is starting to get her memory back." Esme answered. I turned to Alice.

"Alice, have you seen anything about Bella? We think she's going to Forks." I asked her. I was surprised when she gave me a quizzical look and chuckled.

"Edward, why would I be looking for Bella? She's fine." I gaped at her.

"Alice, she was just kidnapped. She is anything but fine right now." She waved her hand in my direction and made a 'psssht' noise.

"No, I'm sure she's fine. Besides, we left her so she would be safe, so now she is. I'm sure Brendon just took her away so that we could keep our promise and not put her in more danger."

The entire family just gawked at her. Esme turned to myself and Jasper, who was standing next to me.

"Is she serious?" she questioned us. He nodded,

"Her emotions are normal. She's not lying." Esme, apparently not satisfied, turned to look me in the eye.

I returned my attention to Alice and scanned her mind.

_'I don't need to worry about Bella. Bella is going to be okay, now that I'm not with her. I don't need to look for Bella, she's just fine. I don't need to worry about Bella. Bella is going to be okay-'_

These words repeated themselves in her mind, over and over. I receded from her mind, as I too began to believe these words. Alice just sat there, admiring her nails. How could this be possible? Then it hit me like a brick wall. Or perhaps harder, since a brick wall wouldn't hurt me this much. My face conorted from the shock and pain.

"He got her too…" I mumbled, and the families attention was instantly on me. "Brendon, he's brainwashed her."

Jasper shook his head, a look of horror on his face. "No, he couldn't have. She doesn't sound like Emme or Derik did."

It took me a moment to decipher this idea. Then I had an thought, brought up by the words repeating in her mind. I turned to Alice and asked, "Alice, look for Bella and see if she's safe."

Alice's face lost all emotion. "I don't need to look for Bella, she's just fine." She answered in a monotone. The family was appalled.

"Ask her a direct question, or give her order about Bella, she'll give you that answer, or one much like it."

Esme just shook her head, and muttered something about Alice going outside for only a second. I didn't stay to listen, as I was already halfway up the stairs and into my room. I packed my clothes and returned to the living room. I saw that Jasper was talking to Alice about Bella, and her monotone answers were slowly gaining volume and clarity. I tapped my foot as the rest of the family gathered in the room and placed suitcases on the floor.

Carlisle returned as well. "I just spoke to Derik. I told him we were leaving and apologized for the trouble. He told me to send Brendon back here when we found him."

"Like he'll still be alive. We can FedEx the pieces to them after I'm done with him. " I muttered as I walked briskly out the door. Jasper ran out behind us.

"I'm staying with Alice here. We'll follow after you when her memory returns." I nodded and got into the car. As we drove to the airport, I imagined all the possible ways I could kill Brendon. That made me feel better. A little better.

At the airport, there was no line to buy tickets, because it was so late. I walked up to the lady at the counter.

"Do have flights to Port Angeles from here?" I asked with urgency. She typed something into her computer. She shook her head no.

"I'm sorry, we have no flights there from this airport. You'd have to connect in Denver or Chicago."

"Could you possibly tell me what flight a girl named Isabella Swan is on?" I asked, trying to sound as alluring as possible. She blinked and seemed stunned, then chuckled.

"We're, um, really not supposed to do that…" _'Oh god, he's gorgeous! How am I supposed to say no to him? Just breathe.'_ she thought. I had this in the bag.

"Please?" I asked, gazing at her from under my lashes. She gulped, then glanced down at her computer quickly.

"Well, I guess just this once…" and she started typing. "There are a few Isabella Swans listed. Where do you think she's going?"

"Somewhere in Washington, perhaps the Port Angeles flight." I told her quickly. She typed in something else.

"Isabella Swan on a direct flight to Seattle, Washington. The plane departs in fifteen minutes."

"I'll take five tickets on that flight." I told her. She shook her head.

"I'm sorry, there's only two more seats left. The next flight to Seattle is in three hours. If you'd like five tickets for that flight, I can get them for you-"

"Give me the two empty seats on the sooner flight, and three for the next one." She stared at my quickly changing attitude.

"Please." I added, tapping my fingers on the table. She got the tickets with no more questions. When she handed me the tickets, she said,

"You only have ten more minutes before…" but by that time I had walked away and started talking to my family.

"I only have two tickets for this flight, the rest of you have to wait for three hours. Someone should call Jasper and let him know." Rosalie whipped out a cell phone and started talking. I continued, "We only have ten minutes to get through security and find the terminal. If we don't find Bella in the terminal, then we'll have to find her on the plane. Who's coming with me?"

"I will," Emmett said, with a glare from Rosalie, "If Brendon decides to fight back, I want a smack at him." I didn't even care that the only reason Emmett wanted to come was to fight. The problem now was security. Luckily, because it was so late, we simply got to walk through. Carlisle got wanded, but since he was waiting for the next flight, Emmett and I let him behind.

We began to run for terminal A3. At the terminal, people were beginning to board. I looked around, but didn't see Bella, or another vampire. The strange thing was, I couldn't smell Bella either. If she was here, I would have been able to catch her scent.

"I can't see her, she's probably on the plane already. We should board." Emmett said. I nodded and walked slowly to the counter. Emmett handed the lady our tickets, as I scanned the area for the sign of anything. It still bothered me that I couldn't smell her. I hoped Brendon wasn't affecting my mind somehow.

We got on the plane and found our seats. I looked every which way, scanned every mind on the plane, but still no sign of Bella.

Something was wrong. Bella was not on this plane.

I should have been able to smell her in such an enclosed space. Her scent would have suffocated me here. Her voice would have been like a chorus singing to me. She wasn't here.

After everyone sat down, we got up and walked to the attendant at the door.

"I'm afraid we need to get off the plane." I told her. But she shook her head.

"I'm sorry sir, but the door had been shut. Please return to your seats."

"You don't understand, we need to get off this flight, right now." I growled at her. She was terrified, but mumbled to us,

"I... I'm sorry…but once…once the door is shut…can't open it…" Emmett walked up and grabbed my arm.

"C'mon Edward, just sit down." He whispered to me as I felt the plane begin to move under my feet. I sat down stunned, and growled to myself. Emmett glared at me. After a minute he asked,

"What was that all about?"

"Bella's not on this flight." I answered him sternly as the plane took off.

* * *

This was a better cliffhanger than the last chapter! Bwhahaha! Please don't come after me with pitchforks... Please review, the next chapter is ready, but only if you want it!


	17. Trickery

Twilight and New Moon belong toStephenie Meyer.

I have been getting a lot of comments on how much people seem to like Brendon. I was actually never expecting this kind of response, I thought everyone would despise him. I had his future pretty much set until recently, when everyone seemed to start liking him. Now, I'm having second thoughts. There are still many who want to see him in peices, of course.

I've told a lot of people that Brendon hasn't been very honest with Bella lately. This chapter is going to explain some of that. Just read and see, and make sure to read the note at the bottom! As always, enjoy!

* * *

I sat in the plane watching as the night clouds rolled by. The lights of the cities below sped by, they were all that you could see in the dark. Slowly, the lights faded away as we began to fly over unpopulated area. With nothing to look at anymore, I turned to gaze at the girl next to me.

Bella was asleep, as she had been for most of the flight. She was dazed as I had bought the tickets, and pretty knocked out when we were sitting waiting for the flight. Luckily for me, she hadn't even bothered to look at the tickets, and was practically unconscious when the attendant had called to board. I don't know what I would have done otherwise.

I didn't like lying to her about this, but it had to be done. She needed to be away from Edward, no matter the cost. She would forgive me once I told her the truth, I was sure of it.

I lay back against the seat and closed my eyes. I remembered when she had gone into her homeroom, saying she had had an epiphany about love. There was only one person she could have spoken about.

I opened my eyes and looked at her again. He perfect face, slightly blushed, with her hair lying against her cheek. I reached over to place it behind her ear. She stirred.

"Edward…" she mumbled in her sleep, and turned over. My hand froze in place. No, it wasn't possible. Could she have meant that her epiphany was about _him_? That she still cared about that demon that had broken her heart?

No, he was worse than a monster, she could never love someone as repulsive as him. Her epiphany had to have been about me. She had to see I was perfect for her, that we were meant for each other. That I could heal her, that she was meant to be in my arms. We would be happy, away from the ones that had hurt her.

I stroked her hair, the placed my hand in my lap and turned to look out the window again. I had thought everything out. Derik and Emme would never remember me, and the Cullens would never be any wiser about my existence. That was a considerable loss, but worth it if it meant Bella would be happy. She had called after they went to pick up Edward and his family, so, since I was already packed, I waited for them to arrive.

I saw them, the ones that I despised but never met, and heard that the one, the girl Alice, saw the future. That could have been problematic, so I left quickly and picked up Bella. When she was safely away from her house, I made up an excuse to go back. The others had left already, I'm not sure why, and Alice was on the roof. Odd circumstances, but I still managed to convince Alice that she didn't need to worry about Bella anymore. There was no way they could find us where we were going now.

I had been a little paranoid when we got into the airport. In case they somehow did manage to follow us here, I bought an extra ticket. It was under Bella's name, and was a flight to Seattle. I had also figured that if she asked for the tickets, I could show her this one. Luckily, she hadn't asked. I pulled it out of my pocket and ripped it up. That ticket was useless now.

My only regret was that I didn't get to meet Edward face to face. I had been hoping to persuade him to leave Bella alone, that he didn't need to love her anymore. If he thought that she had moved on, then he wouldn't bother us. But unfortunately, he had left by the time I returned.

It might have actually been a good thing, I thought as my hands clenched into fists. I'm not sure if I would have been satisfied leaving him in one piece.

An hour or so later, we landed at our destination. I shook Bella, and she woke up, but still looked dazed.

"Hmmm, what? Are we there?" she asked, rubbing her eyes.

"Yeah we just landed. Are you okay?"

"Hmm? Oh, yeah, I'm fine," she yawned, "Just a little sleepy, still." I chuckled.

We got our carryon bags, which was all we had since we had both packed so quickly. I regretted this, but I could always just buy her more clothes later. As we walked off the plane, I supported Bella with my free arm. She still seemed really worn-out, but she was slowly coming awake. She glanced around as we walked through the airport to the rental car counter.

"Um, Brendon?" she said tentatively.

"Hmm?" I answered offhand as we walked.

"Maybe I'm just still tired, but this doesn't look like the Seattle airport." She said, fear creeping into her voice. I had been hoping to postpone this conversation, but now there was no point in beating around the bush. I took a deep breath and stood her up.

"That's because we're not in the Seattle airport, Bella." Her face was confused for a while, the she said hesitantly,

"What do you mean we're not in Seattle?" I looked at the floor, then back at her with an apologetic expression. Her appearance became very angry. "Brendon, tell me what's going on, right now." Her hands had clenched into fists, and her voice was beginning to rise in volume.

"I mean we're not in Seattle. We're in Edmonton, Alberta." Her eyes remained angry, but now mixed in was confusion and doubt.

"I've never heard of Edmonton, Alberta. Where is it?" she asked, her voice very quiet now, composed. But it was in a restrained way, like she was trying not to scream at me. I took another deep breath, and said,

"Bella, we're in Canada." Her face went from all those mixed emotion, strait to shock. But when she screamed at me next, all I could hear was rage.

"What the hell are we in CANADA for?!"

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Haha, Canada... Can you believe it? This chapter may have been a little confusing, so please ask questions if you don't understand something. More will be explained next chapter, so don't worry.

Just so everyone understands, Brendon had no idea that Edward reads minds. He left before he heard that part of the conversation, so he has no idea Edward is trying to find them. I'm not sure if I made that totally clear.

Another note while I'm monologing. If your going to favorite this story, or put it on your alerts, leave a review. I hate it when a random person just puts a story on alert and doesn't say why. I'm a nice person, I like making friends! It's called networking! I try to reply to most comments (unless they are little two worders or something) so say something! Please review!


	18. Questions and Answers

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

So based on my current trend, you can expect updates to come on weekends now. Sorry, but school takes up time, not to mention afterschool sports. If you want to complain, go ahead, but in my mind school comes first.

Anywho, here's chapter 18! Enjoy!

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"What the hell are we in CANADA for?" I screamed at him. My sleepiness was gone. Anger and confusion had taken its place. There was no sensible reason to be in Canada. Brendon sighed,

"Bella, this really isn't the place to talk about this." He told me, reaching for my hand. I tool a step back.

"That doesn't matter, you're going to tell me anyway!" I yelled at him. People began to look at us, giving quizzical looks at my angry stance and loud words. Brendon looked over and they turned and left. No one stared anymore, I suppose because he used his gift to make them stop. This just made me angrier.

"Bella, I'll tell you, but just not here." He said, he was going to continue, but I cut him off.

"You're right, this isn't the place. A plane would be a good place. Know why? Because we're supposed to be in Washington. Charlie is sick, if you've forgotten, and seeing him was the whole point of this trip. Unless he suddenly up and moved to Canada, I see no point in being here." I told him, my voice escalading as I got more and more pissed off. "We're leaving, right now!" And I turned and started walking off.

"Bella, calm down and listen to me!" Brendon ordered me, easily matching my pace. I didn't let up. "Bella, stop!" he demanded, and grabbed my arm forcing me to halt.

"Get off of me!" I yelled as I pulled against his grip, knowing it was useless against his strength. "We need to get to Charlie!"

"Charlie's just fine." He told me calmly, and I ceased struggling.

"What do you mean Charlie's just fine? He's sick and we need to-"

"No, Bella, Charlie is not sick. That's what I'm trying to tell you. Now would you please just calm down and come with me? I'll explain everything later, but just not here."

I starred at him dumbfounded. Charlie wasn't sick. I couldn't find any words for the moment. As hard as it was to believe, I was filled with happiness. Charlie was okay, and he wasn't going to die because I left him alone in Washington. Not that I had ever really believed this, but it was a nice thought.

I didn't even struggle as he pulled me to the rental car area, rented an overly expensive and overly fast car, and started walking out with me in tow. It was early morning, but raining, so the lights reflected off the shiny cars in the garage. As he was about to place me in the car, when I stared at him, a sudden question popping into my mind.

"Wait, how would you know Charlie isn't sick?" He smiled, and it annoyed me. I wasn't sure why.

"I told you, I'll explain later. Please just get in the car." And he opened the passenger door.

"No, you'll tell me now." I said as sternly as I could, crossing my arms across my chest. He sighed and rubbed his eyes. From behind his hand he spoke.

"Because Charlie was never sick. He's probably been cracking down on criminals and sitting in a recliner watching football for the past week, I don't know. But he certainly wasn't dying in some hospital." He told me, his tone sounding almost annoyed. He then looked up with irritation and waved a hand toward the car. "Now will you please get in?"

I looked at him with shock, and without my mind's consent, my body got into the car. But as soon as he shut the door behind me, I knew I had to go with him. I looked over as he got in and started the car.

I didn't know if he was lying or not, but something was missing, some crucial point I wasn't getting. It was one of those things that's so obvious that you smack yourself later for not being able to see it. There was something he wasn't telling me about his whole ordeal, and I needed to find out what.

We drove in silence to a hotel near a mall. We got out of the car and walked briskly up to the front desk.

"I have a reservation, under the name Smith." Brendon said to the receptionist. She typed something into the computer near her, then handed him a room key and told him the room number. We walked to the elevator and got in. We didn't look at each other as the doors closed. Then staring at the door, I asked,

"Why did you use that name Smith?" I tried to keep my voice calm and collected, but the stress managed to leak in. He didn't look over as he responded.

"Because I couldn't use the name Williams." The doors opened in front of us. We walked out but remained side by side, no eye contact.

"Why?" I questioned as we stopped at our room. He pulled out the key card and opened the door quickly. We walked in, and I wasn't surprised to see it was a suite. The living room area was quite nice, with a couch that had a nice pattern and a rather large TV. I threw my bag onto the bed in the adjacent room, then leaned on the door frame as I watched Brendon gazed out the window into the rain.

"Well?" I said, pulling him form his trance. He turned to look at me, but his look was questioning. "You still haven't answered my question. Why couldn't you use your own name?"

He went over and sat on the couch. I only turned my head to look at him. He took a deep breath and started, talking to the floor.

"Because, I can't use that name anymore. It's more than anything a precaution, but it would be stupid not to do it. Some one could find us."

"What, are you running form the law now?" I sarcastically questioned. He chuckled, or at least made a weak attempt to.

"No, but we are running from something else. A lot scarier than that." I frowned, and that idea that he was hiding something racking again at my mind.

"You keep using that plural. 'We' aren't doing anything. _You_ are keeping secrets about my father and dragging me to different countries for a reason I would like explained. Now, if you don't mind." He thought for a moment, making me want to slap him.

"I honestly don't now how to tell you all this." He said apologetically, turning toward me. His eyes were full of sorrow. I didn't feel any pity for him at the moment.

"You can start with why you lied to me about Charlie. How did you know he wasn't sick?"

"Because I was the one who made everyone think he was." He answered. I didn't understand his words.

"What do you mean?" I asked, and he looked out the window again. When he spoke, it was slow and calm.

"Your father was never actually sick. I convinced your mother to call him, and then when they spoke, he mentioned that he thought he was coming down with something. You had said something about your mother letting things get out of hand easily, so I changed her perspective so she thought that what your father had meant was that he was actually extremely sick. It worked, and she told you about it."

"You brainwashed my Mom?!" I screamed at him, and he cringed away. "Why the hell would you want to do something like that!?"

"Because I needed to get you out of Jacksonville." He said quietly, trying to keep me calm I suppose. It didn't work.

"So you tricked my mom, and me for that matter, so that you could fly me to Canada?!" I yelled, "Why would you want me to leave Jacksonville?!" I was pacing around the room now, and with my grace I was kicking things and bruising myself non-stop. I only hoped it made me look angrier.

"Because I didn't want you to get hurt again." He whispered, but loud enough for me to hear. I stopped pacing and looked at him, as the key word of that phrase sunk in. _Again_. He didn't want me to get hurt _again_. The fact that I hadn't understood suddenly weighed down on me, pushing me down to the floor. I sank onto my knees, and whispered one word.

"Edward…"

Brendon was suddenly next to me, his arm around my shoulders. I didn't even try to shake him off. My mind shut down, and I couldn't speak.

"I wasn't going to let him hurt you again. He came to find you, but I knew that he would only bring back those memories. I promised I wouldn't let you cry again, I promised…" But I pushed him away. He looked at me strangely, like there was suddenly a point that he didn't understand.

"Edward came to Jacksonville to see me…and you…you made me leave…" I mumbled to him. The only person I could ever love had come to Jacksonville to see me. I could have told him that I loved him. I could have seen him one more time. Brendon had made me leave. Slowly, I felt the anger rising again.

Brendon's face contorted into confusion. "Why did you make me leave?" I asked with more force.

"Because…your epiphany…you said it was about love…"

"Yes!" I screamed, pushing him away and standing up. "About Edward! I realized I still loved him! What did you think I had an epiphany about?!"

He looked away slowly, a disappointed and shameful emotion dawning on his face. He got up and walked into the other room. I followed him, and then stopped in the doorway as it hit me. I nearly fell over with laughter. He just glared at me.

"You thought…" I said as my speech was disrupted by fits of laughter. "You thought that I loved you!?" He turned his head away, and I knew I was right. It only made me laugh harder. Big mistake.

"SHUT UP!" He yelled, and my laughter was suddenly cut off. He stood in front of me, his shoulders heaving from anger. I shook my head.

"Brendon, I don't know what you possibly have to be mad about. I'm the one that was just kidnapped." I told him sternly. We glared at each other.

"I have every reason to be angry!" he yelled at me.

"What, that you were just humiliated? That's your own fault, Brendon. If you had taken a second to try and figure out the situation instead of jumping to conclusions, none of this would have happened!"

"None of this would have happened if you would just understand that Edward's not meant for you! He's a monster!" He yelled back at me.

"Don't talk about Edward that way! He never would have done something like this! If he's a monster, than I can't even imagine what kind of demon you are!" He rubbed his hand through his hair, and another fact made its way into my mind. Something I should have noticed about Brendon since I had met him.

"You don't like the fact that you can't persuade me, do you?" His eyes locked with mine. "You don't like not being in control of everything around you."

"What if I don't?" he yelled, surprising me, "What if it drives me crazy!?"

"You can't control everyone's lives, Brendon! Taking me here was a horrible thing to do, even if you did think it was right at the time. Which it wasn't!"

"Stop Bella!" he told me, his hand covering his eyes, and his other hand in a shaking fist.

"NO! I'm not going to stop! This is insane. You can't do this to people! It's wrong and immoral and -"

"STOP BELLA!" he yelled, and when his eyes locked onto mine, they were pitch black. His hands, both balled onto fists now, were shaking uncontrollably. His breathing had become quick and raspy.

"What are you going to do, kill me? Are you so bent on controlling some aspect of my life that you choose to kill me so you can accomplish your goal? You wouldn't do something like that Brendon. You can't -" I screamed at him at the top of my lungs, but I was cut off by a sudden pain in my neck. Before my mind had been able to notice, Brendon was next to me. He pulled his head back from my neck suddenly, a look of shock and horror on his face.

"Bella, I'm…" he whispered, his eyes wide. But he was too shocked to speak farther. He stumbled backwards, shaking his head. I didn't comprehend for a second, then something began to run down my neck, and it felt surprisingly warm.

I smelt the blood before anything else. The mix of salt and rust made me woozy. I summoned my courage and reached up to my neck. I felt the warmth of it as it ran onto my hand, and when I pulled my hand back in front of me, my blood blemished the sides of my fingers. The blood was running down to stain my shirt, and the smell was making me nauseous. I could feel the wound beginning to sting.

"You bit me…" I mumbled to him, still not fully able to comprehend the situation. My words barely even made sense to me.

"Bella, I didn't mean to. Bella please…" he tried to explain to me. I just shook my head and stared at the blood on my fingers. The reality of the situation sunk in as the wound started to burn.

"You son of a-"

But my profanity was cut off by my screams as the pain in my neck exploded.

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You must hate me so much right now! But I betcha you didn't see that coming! This is the chapter I want to see people's reactions to, especially about Brendon. His fate will be partially decided by my readers, I've decided, so tell me what you think about him. What is going to happen to him is still somewhat undecided, so depending on your reactions, he may veer onto a different path. Please review!

And thank you to those who reviewed on my last chapter, after my little rant. I just needed to get that out, so thanks for bearing with me! All of you who do review rock my world!


	19. Change

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

Okay, so tar and feather me then scold me for lying. I'm putting this up on a weekday when I just said they would be coming on weekends. I wrote this late last night and didn't have time to put it up. Sorry!

_**WARNING!**_

In advance I would like to put out a warning about this chapter. It is indeed the chapter descibing Bella's change. It is bound to be violent and depressing. My 'editor' (I make fun of her, but she does a good job) has told me that some parts of it were kind of gross, in a gory way. Not all of it, just some, and it's not anythign too horrible. If you don't think you can take it, don't read it. It's not overly descriptive, I just wanted to be accurate about an important part of the story. You have been warned!

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One the first day, I burned.

It felt like every inch of my body was on fire. My veins blazed like they were filled with magma, and my nerves scorched like they were being jabbed with a thousand pins every second. I screamed in the beginning, but after I lost my voice, I could no longer make noise, and I simply cried. Eventually my eyes dried up too, so all I could do was try to hold still.

Movements caused more pain, as I soon found out. I whipped and rolled around to remove the pressure on my body, and hopefully stopping the throbbing. But the movement only made the burning worse, so I tried my best to lie still, and not thrash from the pain.

My vision was filled with my memories. Images of my childhood flashed through my mind. Starting with being pulled out of Charlie's house as my mother left him. It continued, and scenes of me playing at a park with Renee, watching a movie in my living room in Phoenix, going to my first day of school ran through my head almost faster than I could comprehend them.

I watched as my life in Phoenix, the life as the clumsy, pale, friendless girl, was replayed in my mind. After that came the boring summers with Charlie, as I sat in the raining and dreary town of Forks, starring out the window.

On the second day, I was breaking.

While the burning continued, my bones felt like they were snapping into a million pieces. It started with my fingers and toes, and the pain was no worse than the previous day. I thought that I may be able to survive. But eventually it reached my arms and legs, and they began to splinter and crack, eventually breaking. I could actually feel as the cracks moved toward my torso.

At the same time, it felt as if my already broken bones were re-growing themselves. I had injured myself enough that I knew how a broken limb felt, and how it felt for it to heal. But this was a thousand times more painful. It was being done at an extremely fast pace, so the pain was intensified. At the same time, I was happy that it wasn't drawn out; I didn't know if I could take that much pain.

As my bones shattered, my muscles were being ripped apart. The tendons were torn, and the fibers split. This added to the burning, and the ache. Again, they began to grow anew, weaving back together at an immeasurable pace.

Irrevocably, the breaking reached my spine and ribs. This was the worst part, if I had thought the pain was bad before, I had been mistaken. My spine already burned from the fire, and now it was being torn apart. As my ribs broke, it felt like they pierced my heart. I thought someone was stabbing me with a burning dagger. I found out that I hadn't completely lost my voice, because I began to scream again.

The memories continued that day. This time they were of my life in Forks. I saw my first day at Forks High, meeting my friends, going shopping in Port Angeles, doing homework together, making phone calls. Then the time after Edward had left, when I did nothing but stare at the ceiling and cry. But it bothered me that I didn't see the one part of Forks that had made me the happiest. Any vision of Edward or his family was missing.

On the third day, I lost control of my senses.

My hearing went haywire. I spent what seemed like hours deaf to any sound, to suddenly be hit with a tuning orchestra of noises. I could hear the cars in the street, the tap of Brendon's feet as he paced about the room, the television in the room below us, the kitchen clamor of the café across the street, the gentle tap of water falling from a faucet across the hall, the voice of a man on the street as he whispered in the ear of his wife, nothing seemed to be any quieter than anything else. After some time, I went deaf again, and I almost went crazy from the sudden silence of my mind.

At the same time, my sense of smell also began to fluctuate wildly. I could smell the fresh flowers in the living room, the room service breakfast on the third floor, the cologne on a man in the lobby, the air that Brendon was breathing in and out, and the blood the faintly pulsed in my veins. Then, as my hearing had, it suddenly stopped, and I became almost unable to breathe.

The same happened for my touch, at one point I could feel the very fibers of the sheets I was lying on, and the molecules of oxygen in the air. Then I felt as if I was floating in a dark abyss, nothing but the dull ache of the pain to let me know I was still alive.

My sense of taste was not affected, I suppose because there was nothing for me to eat at the time. But strangely, it felt like my mouth was prickling, and sometimes I couldn't feel it. One moment it was swelling, another moment it was cold, and at points I couldn't feel my tongue.

The worst was my vision. It would black out at times, only to open again to find I was starring at something I had never seen before, so intricate it was almost impossible. Then my vision would return to normal, to find I had been staring at a crystal of ice distorted by the glass it was in. This happened many times, and I was surprised by the world of beauty I had been blind to for so long.

Sometimes these absences would happen at the same time as each other. I could hear, but not smell or feel, or see what was making the noise. Or I could see everything around me, but not be able to hear or smell, or feel its texture. Sometimes I could do nothing, all of my senses gone, and it was then that I had truly thought I was dead.

At the end of the third day, I died.

The pain all dulled. The burning stopped, my nerves calmed, the shattering of my bones ceased, and my muscles were not being torn. Soon, I didn't hurt anymore. But I was tired; the pain had taken my strength with it. I couldn't move.

My senses began to disappear. First, I lost my sense of smell. Then next, I could no longer hear, then no longer taste. After that was the sense of touch. Finally, my vision blurred, and then I was floating in complete darkness. My own personal oblivion.

I floated there for what seemed like a long time. Then, slowly, I heard a faint noise. It was soft, but constant. I realized it was my heart beating. It sounded so weak, like it was using the last of its strength to keep me alive.

I lie there in the darkness and listened to my heart, when suddenly, my memories started to come. They were the memories that had been absent from my previous recap of my life. They were the memories that I had once tried to hide from myself. They were the memories that I now held most dear to me. They were memories of Edward.

I relived the emotions of when I first saw him, sitting across the cafeteria. I remembered his actions that first day in class, when he first spoke to me, being saved by him during the car crash. I remembered when he saved me from the men in Port Angeles, and all the talk we had afterwards about what he truly was. I saw us in the meadow, talking about how he wanted to kill me, and how he loved me. I saw our first kiss, how he stayed in my room that night, meeting his family, running from James and Victoria, the last words he uttered to me before he left me alone, so much more alone than I had ever been.

Every memory that was behind both of us, in the past that could not be changed, every moment I had spent with him was rewound through my mind. I listened to my heart, knowing it was what he had heard everyday. I watched his face, so perfect, show the emotions that I missed so much. Finally, when it was all done, a final image of him was shown in my mind. It was the perfect image of him, perfect down to every little detail. I realized this was what my mind had preserved for me, so that during my last moments, I could remember him exactly like I wanted. The vampire I loved, and that had once loved me.

His face was confused, starring at me like I wasn't really there. Then his eyes grew wide and he whispered my name.

"Bella…"

I would have sighed if I could, his voice was beautiful even in my memory. I could hear my heart, so constant before, was beginning to slow and grow fainter. I really was dying, this was the end. Edward's face was contorted in pain as he heard my heart as well as I could, as he heard me die.

"Bella, no!" he cried suddenly, "I can't loose you!" His voice broke into sobs.

I wanted to tell him that he wasn't loosing me, we would be together eventually, someday. I would wait in heaven, just like I had promised in my letter, and everything would be okay. But my voice was weak, I couldn't say everything I wanted to. So with the last of my strength, I whispered across the darkness the phrase that held everything I ever could say,

"I love you Edward."

Then my vision blurred and turned to black, Edward's face the last thing I would ever see…

I got very cold…

My heart stopped beating…

And I was finally dead.

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The end! Hahaha! Just kidding of course! Before anyone asks, Bella's not actually dead. But some others may think she is... Please review, and if anyone thinks that this is not appropriate or too gory, please tell me, and I can make an effort to change it. Thanks!


	20. Lost

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

There seemed to be a lot of confusion in the last chapter about Edward's role. This chapter should clear some of that up. It's short, but important. Enjoy!

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The plane ride was pure torture. The idea of ripping the door open at fourteen thousand feet and jumping to the ground didn't seem like such a bad idea at times. 

All I could think of was Bella being taken to some unknown location by Brendon. His very name made me want to tear the closest object to shreds. The image of his face that I had seen in Derik's thoughts had haunted my thoughts since we had taken off.

I didn't know what he was going to do with Bella, or why he would want to kidnap her. I ran through all the possibilities, but none of them made any sense. The way he had done it had been nearly faultless. He wiped his parent's memories, convinced Alice that she didn't need to look for Bella, and managed to make sure Bella's parents thought that nothing was wrong. What he had done was not a spur of the moment decision, he had planned this nearly perfectly.

Nearly, but not quite. If it wasn't for the fact that I could read minds, everything would have remained as he planned. He had obviously not known about my ability. But none of this explained the reason that he had taken Bella in the first place.

The first most logical conclusion was that he had kidnapped her to kill her. But that was a conclusion I was unwilling to accept. The fact that he would go through so much trouble to kill one person didn't make sense. I also refused to accept that Bella could be dead.

Another option was that Bella had gone with him for a reason. Her parents had not been brainwashed by Brendon, so perhaps she had agreed to go with him. Her letter clearly explained that there was no romance between them. That meant that if she had agreed to go, it would have had to be for a pretty good reason. Brendon had known that I was coming to Jacksonville, Derik would have told him. So maybe it was something to do my sudden appearance on the scene. But Bella would never have agreed to leave with him if she had known that I was coming.

I couldn't come up with anything. Emmett just sat there the whole flight starring at me like I was insane. All his thoughts were occupied with ways he could somehow hurt Brendon. When we landed, I managed to compose myself enough that I didn't run off the plane before anyone had stood up.

Emmett and I walked out of the terminal into Seattle Airport's main area. Crowds of people swarmed by, and their thoughts flew threw my mind. I didn't pay attention to them as we walked toward our destination.

Suddenly, I felt like something was happening, something important. I stopped walking, and Emmett stopped a few paces ahead of me. He turned around to look at me.

"Edward, what's wrong?" he asked. I shook my head.

"I don't know. I think something's wrong…" I told him. I tried to begin walking again, but as soon as I moved, I fell to the floor screaming.

My heart hadn't beat in over a hundred years, but right now it felt like someone was ripping it out of my chest. Slowly the pain subsided, and I could hear a faint beating. It was so familiar to me, but I couldn't place the noise. Slowly, the cold floor beneath me faded away, and I stood up in complete darkness.

An object gradually came into focus in front of me. At first, I couldn't make it out, but then the horror dawned on me. She looked different in subtle ways, like someone had taken her most beautiful features and intensified them. Her eyes were closed, but they slowly opened to look at me. A faint smile flickered on her face. It was Bella, more beautiful than she had ever been.

"Bella…" I whispered to the darkness. She just looked at me, not moving. I realized that the faint beating I heard was her heart. It was slowing, and becoming fainter. I realized she was dying, and that she knew it as well as I did.

"Bella, no!" I cried to her, finding I could not move to her side, "I can't lose you!" I yelled frantically across the abyss, my voice beginning to crack. I felt the sobs coming.

Her eyes became sad, and then they filled with determination. She looked like she was trying extremely hard to summon the strength to do something, and I realized she was trying to speak. When she spoke her voice was soft and weak, but was still the most wonderful noise I would ever know.

"I love you Edward." She said, so quietly it was hard to hear. Then her eyes closed, and I could hear her heart stop, and the darkness faded away.

I opened my eyes to see I was still lying on the floor of the airport, my tearless sobs racking my body. A crowd of people had appeared around us. Emmett was kneeling by my side, asking me what was wrong.

"She's dead!" I cried, "Bella's dead!" and my sobs continued. Emmett's face sunk, his eyes growing wide. He hoisted me up, and leaning on him, we walked through the crowd. As we walked outside, it was raining. I thought this was the earth's way of saying that it shared in my grief, and cried the tears that I no longer could for me.

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So, to get things strait, Edward was not in Canada when Bella was being changed. If anyone has questions or concerns, plese feel free to ask! Please review!

In other news, I would like to ask a question of other writers. This is my first fanfic, so I am very pleased with it, of course. But, I would still like to know if it is doing as well as I think it is. After my 19th chapter, this story had a total of 235 reviews, is favorited by 52 people, and is on alert for 101 people. Is this considered good, or do I need to step it up a notch? I'm dying to know!


	21. New and Improved

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

Apparently, my last chapter didn't explain anything. Don't worry, though, the entire ordeal will be explained in later chapters. I also got many reviews stating that readers want more action.

Well here it is! An action packed chapter with bombs, explosions, a helicopter escape, vampires jumping through rings of fire over large vats of chemicals, and they only have 24 hours to find the missing scientists. Okay, not really, but that would be so awesome! Enjoy!

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My eyes slowly opened to the drab wallpaper of the hotel room. The drapes were all closed, so the only light came from the lamp next to the bed. I was surprised that even with the very little amount of light, I could see everything in the room with perfect clarity.

My body felt very hard and stiff. I lifted my hand very slowly and looked at it. I gasped with surprise. My skin was perfectly smooth. My fingers were long and slender. I had never described a hand as beautiful before, but that's all I could think of it as.

When I was done starring at my hand, I sat up and looked around the room. Everything was perfectly placed, except for the sheets on the bed, which I was lying on. I marveled at the clarity of my vision. It was like I had spent my whole life watching the world on a black and white television, and someone had just upgraded me to HD. My peripheral vision had increased so much that it felt like I could almost see behind me. The colors of objects were amazingly perceptible to me, even in the partial darkness.

I moved to get out of the bed, and my hand swept across my leg. I was surprised to find that I was very cold and very hard. I held up both my hands. Taking my right hand, I poked my left arm. As I expected it was cold, and it took a little more force to make it move. It felt like I was made of marble.

I stood up a walked to the bathroom. The carpet felt strange against my bare feet, like I could feel to very fibers it was woven out of. I ran my hand across the bedside table as I walked by, and found that my fingers could feel the miniscule imperfections, every bump or indent, every grain of wood.

I even amazed myself with what I could hear. The sound of my footsteps on the ground, and my hand as it swept the table wasn't loud, per say, but I could hear it as easily as if it was someone talking to me. It was as if all my senses had been enhanced a thousand times over so that nothing was hidden from me.

I stopped walking about halfway to the bathroom. My movements confused me. They were too fluid, too graceful. I had spent my entire life falling on my face because I had tripped over my own feet. This way of walking was foreign to me, like I had materialized into a model, and I constantly walked like I was on a runway. I turned around and strolled back across the room, feeling this new way of moving. Eventually, I skipped, loving the motions and the pleasure of being able to do so without falling.

I even giggled. When I did so, my voice surprised me. With my new sense of hearing, I was able to notice that it was different. It was like bells chiming, and it had a very clear ring. I began to wonder what other changes had occurred. I walked into the bathroom to look at myself in the mirror.

I gasped in surprise when I saw myself. I thought I was pale before, but now all color had been drained from my skin. Only my cheeks had a slight flush, probably because my blood was still in my system, though I didn't need it now. My hair had retained its deep brown color, but it shown with a new gloss, like its color had been intensified. My facial features had also been intensified in a good way. My lips had always been too full, but now they fit my face perfectly. My eyebrows had taken on a little more of an arch, and my skin was once again flawless. For the first time in my life, I felt beautiful.

But for some reason, I couldn't believe. I reached out my hand to touch the mirror, to make sure it was real. But my hand flew out faster then I thought possible. It shattered the mirror, and the pieces fell to the floor. My hand floated in midair. I hadn't felt a single thing, I wasn't bleeding, and there was no glass in my hand. Suddenly, Brendon ran into the room.

"Bella!" he yelled, and I looked over, my hand still in the air. He sighed and leaned against the doorframe, "I heard the crash and thought something had happened. It scared the daylights out of me." He looked back over with a sly grin on his face. "By the way, you look really beautiful. Truly, you do."

I dropped my hand to my side. I glanced down to look at the shattered glass at my feet. I caught sight of my eyes. They were no longer the chocolate brown I had known. They were black, with a tint of red around the edges from the blood that still lingered in me. I saw as they became filled with anger. I turned to Brendon.

"You bit me." I stated, once again shocked by the change in my voice. My words were more pronounced and articulate, but still flowed together in a striking way. Their ambiance, even in my anger, was like the peal of a bell.

Brendon turned away. "Yes, I bit you, and I'm sorry. I never meant for this to happen. Please, forgive me."

My mouth fell open in shock. "You turned me into a vampire, put me through three of the most painful days of my life, and all you can think to say is 'Sorry, my bad. Forgive me?' Something is seriously wrong with you!" I screamed at him. He looked back into my eyes.

"Well what do you want me to say? It's not like I ever wanted to do something like that!" He yelled back.

"Oh yes, that right. You thought we were going to be all lovey-dovey for eternity. Well sorry, but that fantasy of yours was delusional." I said sarcastically.

"Look Bella, what's done is done. I'm sorry that I lost control like that, but I can't change you back, nothing can."

I sighed, his words were true, and they cut deep. It was my fault partially, I shouldn't have yelled at him the way I did, edging him on. Now I was a vampire, and there was nothing I could do about it.

But wait, I was a vampire. I hadn't truly admitted this to myself yet, and it was only now that the truth sank in. I was an immortal vampire, a living example of a fairy tale, or perhaps a horror story. Wasn't this what I had always wanted? To be able to live an eternity with the one I loved? This thought brought back the current situation.

"Edward was in Jacksonville." I said to Brendon. He had moved to sit on the couch, and he just nodded, his head in his hands.

"Bella, I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to-"

"Stop apologizing. It's my entire fault. I should have never lead you on like that, it was wrong of me. I should have explained the situation to you, not just…look, I'm sorry. This," I said, waving a hand at myself, "This was my fault too. I shouldn't have made you mad. I was just feeling so betrayed and angry; I couldn't stop everything I wanted to say from spilling out." I felt like I was going to cry, but my eyes weren't watering. I realized I would never be able to cry again. This only wanted to make me cry more. "I'm sorry Brendon." I whispered, and the sobs started to break up my voice.

"Bella, no, none of this is your fault." He said, rushing over to me. He came extremely quickly, but I could now catch his every movement. Before, it would have seemed that he had disappeared from where he was to reappear at my side. But now that wasn't the case. It wasn't that he was slower; it was that my vision was faster, and my mind could comprehend what was happening.

"Bella, you can't blame yourself for this." He slowly wrapped his arms around me. But I pushed away, my sobs had stopped. "What's wrong?"

"Brendon, I need you to understand that nothing is happening between us. You can't keep acting this way, I don't love you. I know it sounds harsh, but you need to understand the truth." I told him, my voice as serious as I could make it. He hung his head and sighed.

"I know Bella. But maybe, someday, you could feel the same way. I'm not saying you have to now but…I'm willing to wait."

I just starred at him, my mouth slightly agape. "Are you even listening to me? You don't get it. I don't love you, and I won't ever love you. I'm sorry, but that's just the way things are."

"You can't possibly still love Edward, can you?" He asked, mystified, "He broke your heart, he's the worst kind of monster. How could you even care about him?"

"Edward may have done those things, but that doesn't mean that I don't still love him. Love means that you're willing to look past the flaws and see the good. And just because he doesn't love me, that doesn't mean I can't love him." Then a thought came to mind. "I have to find him."

"What?" Brendon exclaimed as I went to go change my clothes. I shut the door of the bedroom and yelled back to him through it.

"If Edward was looking for me, than he has something to say. I need to find him and find out what it is. Then when he sees that I've changed, maybe he'll be willing to take me back." As I slipped on a shirt, I realized two things. One was that my clothing didn't fit my new slim figure. I had gained curves in the right places, and my waist was slightly smaller. I would need to go shopping.

The second thing was that even if Edward didn't take me back, I would make him. I was now just as strong and fast as he was. If he ran, I would run after him. I wouldn't let him be distracted anymore.

I walked out of the bedroom and Brendon grabbed my wrist. "This is insane, you can't leave. You're a new vampire Bella. If you walk out into the middle of the lobby you're going to massacre everyone. Plus, it's the middle of the day. Don't you have any sense at all?"

"First off, it's drizzling outside. I can hear it as well as you now." His eyes grew hard. "Second, I'm going to have to leave the hotel at some point. I might as well do it now. Some of my own blood is left in my system, so I'm not thirsty. This is actually the best time to leave."

I meant to only shake off his grip. But as I flung my arm, he held on longer than I expected, and I didn't know my own strength. He ended up flying across the room and hitting wall. A large indent in the plaster was left. He stood up and yelled at me, "What did you do that for?!"

"I'm sorry…" I looked at my hand, "I didn't know I was that strong…I really didn't mean to…"

He sighed, "Bella, this is why you can't leave. Even if you're not thirsty, you could hurt someone without meaning too. We'll just stay a little longer. Besides, you don't know where Edward is. He could have left Jacksonville by now."

"I don't care. I'm leaving." I told him, heading for the door. He moved in front of me, blocking my path. "Get out of my way Brendon." I told him, and I was surprised that I actually began to growl. It came from deep in my chest, and resonated in my throat. I sounded like a giant cat.

"No, you're staying here. I'm not letting you go alone. You wouldn't survive a minute out there without me." Brendon told me sternly.

"You think I can't take care of myself? I'd probably be better off without you. Now move." And I pushed him out of the way. Once again I had underestimated my strength, and he flew across the room onto a coffee table, shattering it. I didn't care, I simply walked out of the room.

Walking towards the elevator, I watched as the doors opened and a middle aged man walked out, reading a newspaper. I could smell him from all the way down the hallway. I expected him to smell appealing to me, but instead, I was slightly repulsed. Still, I held my breath, hoping that my sense of smell would stop, so that I didn't actually kill this man. I found that as I walked down the hall, not breathing didn't begin to hurt, and my sense of smell did dull.

As we walked past each other, he didn't look up from his paper. I thought everything was going to be alright, until he suddenly took a wrong step and bumped into me. The breath I had been holding was let out, and I could smell again. The scent of the man's blood hit me full force, and I fell to the ground gasping.

"Oh my gosh, are you alright miss?" he asked. I sat there on my hands and knees, feeling ill. The man's blood smelt like a mixture of rust and salt. It made me want to be sick. "Do you need help?" the man asked again, his hand reaching to me. Brendon suddenly flew out of the room.

"Bella!" he screamed down the hallway. I brushed the man's hand away, as carefully as I could. It worked, and all he did was step back. I got up quickly and ran the elevator. I turned at the last minute to run down the stair well. Running downwards in the circular motion, I realized it was going to take forever to get to the bottom. Brendon was close behind me, and I wasn't going to let him lock me up in a hotel room. I needed to get to Edward. So I made a quick decision.

I grabbed the handrail, hoisted myself over the edge, and dropped down the center of the stair well.

They did it in movies, right? So I figured it would work. Wrong. The stairwell was extremely thin, so there was very little space for me to fall through. I stuck my arms as close to my sides as possible, and tried to remain very strait. When I did hit the bottom, I felt the floor crumple beneath me. A scream escaped my lips. But I stood up and felt my legs. They were unharmed, just like the rest of my body.

I looked up the stairwell to see Brendon's face from the top levels looking down at me. I was able to see his face perfectly, and it was a wonderful mix of shock and awe. I cracked a smile and ran out the emergency exit.

As I had predicted, it was rainy and overcast. I was a little disappointed, I had wanted to see my skin sparkle, but I knew it would have been a disaster if someone had seen me. I ran around to the hotel garage, amazed at my speed. It seemed like people didn't even see me, and I was able to dodge between them easily. I held my breath again, not wanting to get sick from the smell of all the people's blood that was around me.

When I found the rental car, I smacked my head with my hand. I had forgotten the keys. How stupid could I get? This was really bad…

"Looking for these?"

I spun around to see Brendon standing not ten feet away, the car keys dangling in his fingers. A smug grin was plastered on his face.

"Your little stunt on the stairs was interesting. I'll admit I was impressed, if not amazed that you actually pulled it off. But you really should have thought your whole plan through before running off."

I glared at him, the growl coming up from my chest again. "Give me the keys, right now."

"No, I'm not letting you leave like this. You can't just-"

But his words were cut off as I rammed his chest with my elbow. A sound escaped his lips that was somewhere between a gasp and an 'oomph'. But I quickly grabbed the keys from his hand as we were still falling in midair. He landed on his back, with me on top of him, and I quickly got up and ran over to the car, opening the locks.

I got in the drivers seat, and shoved the keys in the ignition. I grabbed onto the steering wheel a little too hard, crunching it in my fingers. I cursed quietly to myself as I backed up and pulled out. I was very careful to not punch down on the gas too hard, for fear that it too would break.

As I passed Brendon, he was still lying on the ground, starring at me. His eyes were wide with shock. As I sped by, I shouted to him,

"Sorry Brendon!"

I knew he could hear.

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Action packed, huh? I hope your all satisfied! Please review, and thank you for all the congrats about my story's apparent success! You guys all rock my world!


	22. Monster

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

Sorry, sorry, sorry! I know I haven't posted for nearly two weeks, and I am very very sorry. I haven't been able to find time to write during the week, and usually do so on the weekends. But last weekend I was away, so I didn't have time to write. I know that these are pretty lame excuses, but since tennis season is over I should be able to write more often. Please be understanding and stick with me! Here's the next chapter, so enjoy!

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Speeding down the highway, I realized why Edward had never been able to drive slowly. Driving through Canada, I had realized that I could see further down the road than normal. I could suddenly see 10 miles down the road, around curves and over hills. I didn't ask how at the time, but later learned that it was because of my advanced hearing and senses, my mind was able to fabricate a mental image of the environment that I couldn't see. I didn't need to worry about oncoming traffic or other cars because I could see them all coming.

I got out my map to check if I was going in the correct direction. I only knew that Tanya's family lived in Denali, but I wasn't really sure where that was. I took a wild guess when I saw that it was near the Denali National Park. Food source, of course…

I was getting hungry myself, and the thirst was getting unbearable. Every time I sped past a car, I could smell the blood of the passengers. Though for some reason, this blood was not appetizing for me. It smelled like the rust and salt of the man's blood in the hotel. Edward had always told me that the smell was different for each person, but I couldn't detect anything like that. Just a mix of smells that made me want to gag.

But despite my disgust, I still wanted the blood. Something in me was urging me to stop the car and kill the nearest person to me. Though the blood repulsed me, it attracted me at the same time. The confusion nearly made me run off the road a few times. I laughed quietly at myself, thinking how well Edward drove. Always down the center of the road, never faltering, always perfect.

He occupied the rest of my thoughts. When I wasn't resisting the urge to crash the car into some minivan, I though of what I was going to say to him when we finally met.

I had decided to go to Denali for a few different reasons. One was the idea that Brendon may have lied to me. What if Edward never really went to Jacksonville? What if he had just used that excuse for his own purposes? I had clearly seen that manipulating people was one of his fortes, so it would come at no surprise. Another reason was that once Edward had figured out that I wasn't in Jacksonville, he would have come back here. Unless of course he had extended his vacation…

I tried to think of what to say to him. I couldn't just burst into Tanya's home and exclaim 'Hey Edward! Look, I'm a vampire now, too! Do you want to go see a movie tonight? No? Okay, I'll just go find myself a rabbit to drink…'

I needed a way to say everything I felt. How scared I was of myself, scared I would hurt someone. How much I wanted to see him, that I still cared for him, how much I wanted to lie in his arms and cry. How much I wanted to cry again, to cry for him, myself, for the family l had lost, the family I may gain. I couldn't think of anything that would do all these feeling justice, except for one phrase. I love you, Edward.

But that was so cliché.

So I focused instead on driving in a strait line. Not that an accident would do much harm to me now, but I didn't want to cause a scene. I had only managed to crush the steering wheel one other time, and the three compressed areas didn't make it too hard to steer. With this in mind, I was trying to be extremely careful with the gas pedal.

The traffic thinned and grew as I switched between highways and shortcuts. The day became dark, turned to night, and then the sun rose again. Not all the way of course, just enough to give a slight light through the constant cloud cover. I never grew tired, never stopped driving. That is, until I ran out of gas.

Driving from Edmonton to Denali was a long distance, but a gas refill never crossed my mind. Even with my new body, my new senses, and my new way of viewing the world, I could still me as dim as a brick.

Looking at my map, I saw the nearest town was Whitehorse. Scratch that, Whitehorse was a city. And it was one city that I would not be visiting. The lust for blood was getting unbearable, and I couldn't risk going into a crowded area, especially a gas station. I looked at the dashboard, thinking that maybe I could make it a little farther before I had to stop. Unfortunately, I found that if I wanted to get anywhere in this car soon, a gas stop was necessary.

I quickly scanned the map again. There, less than 8 miles from Whitehorse was Fish Lake. Despite its uncreative name, it was a perfect area. There were hardly any towns on the perimeter, and water meant animals. I swerved off onto an exit and headed for the lake.

I stopped in an area close enough the Whitehorse that I could have enough gas to get there, and then parked the car. I stepped out and placed the keys in my pocket. Looking at the edge of the woods, I felt almost eager. This was a place where I was in my prime. I was the hunter, I dominated these woods. I didn't know what had come over me that I suddenly felt this way, but it was a feeling of confidence that I liked. I took a step forward, and then started to run.

It was a feeling better than the confidence that I felt as I ran. The trees sped by as I swerved and dodged around them. It was as easy as if had been walking down the streets of Port Angeles. My feet found good footing without me even thinking about it. They pushed off with force, using my new strength as the perfect advantage. I was propelled forward at an alarming rate, but it didn't matter to me. I enjoyed the momentum, the speed, the wind in my face. I smiled and laughed as I launched myself over a fallen log. My feet landed at the perfect angle, and I didn't loose any speed as I pushed off again.

Not only did I enjoy the speed, but I enjoyed my gracefulness as well. Even at the pace I was running at, I could feel that my body was moving in eloquent movements. I wasn't falling on my face, and I didn't look like a running orangutan. I reached the lake in too soon a time.

Looking at the surface of the water, I again marveled at my new vision. But I was cut off from my fascination by the scent of blood. I felt my body shudder in response to it, and I turned to face the direction it came from. My vision closed onto a deer about a hundred and twenty meters away.

I instinctively crouched down, and a low growl erupted from my chest. My mind ran through every possibility of an outcome in a second, and in that second the deer looked up into my eyes. I launched myself at it.

Before it had time to try to run, I was too close for it to get away. It never even had a chance. It stood in front of me frozen in fear. My predator side took advantage of this, and I was quick to break its neck. A gash in its neck began to bleed. It smelt the same as human blood, rusty and salty at the same time. But I didn't care. I felt my eyes grow wide for less than a moment, then my mouth was against its neck, and its warm blood was flowing down my throat.

When I brought my head up and wiped the blood from my lips, I looked down at the deer. Its eyes were glazed over and it was pale. I stood up and stepped back. Edward's words rang in my head. What he had always called himself, what I never believed, and what I now had become.

The worst kind of monster.

I killed to stay alive. I took the life of others to live. I was a monster. My immeasurable strength crumbled, and my legs gave out beneath me. I once again regretted that I was no longer able to cry, as dry heaving sobs still racked my body. I had been a predator, I had hunted in an animalistic way, and worse than that, I had partially enjoyed it. The blood gave me strength, and I could feel the thirst dying away. I was revived, but at what cost?

Is this what I had always wanted? To become this creature, this fiend of demise and sorrow? If I had known that it would be like this, would I still have wanted it?

The answer rang in my head. Yes, of course I would. Because despite the horror that appeared with my transformation also came the opposite side. This was the dark, and the light was Edward. The good part of this bargain with the devil was love.

I stood up and ran back to the car. I found my way easily, retracing steps and recognizing landmarks. My memory lead the way, my vision allowed me to see farther, pick out what direction to go. When I got in the car I peeled around and headed towards Whitehorse.

I needed to find Edward. Soon.

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Hooray for Google Maps! These towns and places are real, so if you live there, yay for you! Let me know, because that would be amazing! Please review, and again, sorry for the delay!


	23. Denali

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

Here's another chapter for your enjoyment. I hope this is enough to forgive me for not updating in so long. Again, thank you to Google Maps! Enjoy!

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I got gas in Whitehorse without a problem. I did it quickly in the beginning of the night. No one spoke to me, I don't think I could have handled the situation very well if they had. I was too disgusted with myself at the moment.

I pulled out of Whitehorse onto the Alaskan Highway. Driving too fast, I read the map again. I realized that I had no idea where Tanya's family lived. Way to go Bella. There were only a few towns near the Denali National Park, and one named Healy seemed to be the largest. I decided that was the best place to start. It wasn't like I was in any rush; I had eternity to search, right?

But at the same time, I knew that if I didn't find Edward soon, I was going to have a major breakdown. I needed answers, I needed comfort, and I needed someone to tell me everything was going to be okay. I wasn't sure if Edward would do all that. I wasn't even sure if he still cared about me. But I knew that he had come to Jacksonville to talk to me, so there had to be something he wanted to say. We could both say what was needed, explain our sides, then depending on the outcome I would either stay with Edward for eternity, or go have a mental breakdown in the middle of the woods with some squirrels. I was really hoping for the first outcome.

For now I kept my emotions in check. I tried to figure out how I was going to find Tanya's home. When I finally reached Healy, it was larger than I had thought. I drove around until I found a school. This seemed to be a good place to start. I parked the car in the lot and realized that it stood out like a sore thumb. Brendon had rented some sort of expensive sports car that only an avid Car and Driver reader would recognize. It was as ostentatious as Rosalie's convertible. I sighed and walked into the front office of the tiny school. The attendant sat at the front desk, chewing on gum and scribbling something on a notepad. I walked up and waited for her to notice me. She just continued to scribble. Finally I cleared my throat. The attendant jumped.

"Oh my gosh, you scared the daylights out of me!" she got out once her breathing returned to normal. I held my breath. Her heart had almost skipped a beat, and I heard as her heart rate increased dramatically. Though the smell still repulsed me, it was no less alluring.

"Are you here to pick up Lillian and Evander?" She asked. I gave her a puzzled look. Who were Lillian and Evander? Was I supposed to know someone? Had Alice seen me coming? I managed to speak without taking a breath.

"I'm not quite sure who they are." I told her and her face sank.

"Oh, I'm very sorry. You just look so much like them, I was sure you were related." She shook her head. People who look like me? I nearly smacked myself in the head because of my stupidity. I was gorgeous now, too. I would look like other vampires.

"Are they related to Tanya?" I asked nicely. I probably sounded like dolt. She seemed confused for a moment before asking,

"Yes, those two are Tanya's children. Do you know her?" I thought fast.

"Umm…yeah. Tanya's my…dad's cousin. I never really met her, but my dad got a job overseas and she's the only relative I could come stay with at the time." The lie slid out easily. I worked to make my voice sound convincing. "My dad was in a rush to leave, and he never gave me an address. Could you tell me where she lives?"

The lady smiled and answered, "Of course. Get on route 3 and then make a left turn onto Lester Road. The last driveway on the street is hers, right after the bed and breakfast. It's a long driveway, so you won't be able to see the house."

"Thanks." I said, turning to go out the door. She said something in a ways of goodbye, but I wasn't really listening. I had hit the bull's-eye; Tanya's family was in this town. I got back in the car and followed the directions.

The house was the last one on the street, and its driveway curved in a direction away from town. It was probably one of the most outlying houses in the community. Of course, the attendant had only been partially right. I could see the house from the road, even though the driveway was around 600 feet long. I pulled in and stared at the house.

Of course it was large. That had pretty much become expected by now. It was one of those homes that is meant to look like a log cabin, but much to eccentric and expertly designed to be one. A porch with a swing wrapped around the first floor, and made the entire home seem inviting and warm. I was pretty sure that they didn't get many visitors though.

I got out of the car slowly and walked up to the front door. Carefully, I raised my hand and knocked. I didn't want their first impression of me to be the clumsy vampire who breaks things.

Almost instantly the door was opened by a beautiful, tall, strawberry blonde wonder. She eyed me curiously, not saying a word. I stared at her with equal curiosity. This was the first time I had seen another vampire, besides Brendon. I had been so preoccupied with being angry at him at the time that I didn't notice any differences. But now, looking at this vampire, I started to see the variation. It wasn't that she was any less beautiful. In fact, I thought she was very pretty. But it didn't seem to matter.

I had always been so taken aback by the looks of the Cullens. They were all faultless, all picture perfect models. It was part of what they were, another useless gift that was used to attract prey. But now that I was another hunter, it didn't matter to me. I was no longer just another human, I was no longer prey. I was a perfect as they were, so seeing another perfect person didn't matter too much to me. I smiled at the thought.

"Can I help you?" She finally asked, breaking the silence.

"Um, yeah, I think so. Is this Tanya's residence?" I asked hesitantly. It hit me that I had just asked the stupidest question ever. Of course this was Tanya's place, how many vampire covens could live in one town? She answered nicely though.

"I sure hope this is my house, or else all those payments to the bank were for nothing." She smiled at me. "I'm Tanya."

I let out a breath that I didn't even know I was holding. "My name is…Sarah," I lied, "I'm a friend of the Cullens."

I don't now why I lied to her. I supposed it was for fear of rejection. What if Edward heard I was coming, and refused to see me? Would he turn me away because he didn't ever want to see me again? I needed to see him, I couldn't take the chance of him saying no.

Tanya's face fell slightly, "The Cullens? How do you know them?"

"I lived with them shortly about a year ago." I was getting good at this lying thing. "When I checked their home in Forks, they weren't there. I thought they maybe came here. Carlisle mentioned this place a lot, and I decided it was a good idea that it was time to visit and finally meet you."

"Odd, they never mentioned a Sarah…" she said puzzled, but then shrugged and her smile returned. "Well, a friend of Carlisle is a friend of ours. Please come in." And she turned and walked into the house. I stood in the doorway dumbfounded, then quickly walked into the house, shutting the door behind me.

The entrance was open and inviting, a large stairway winding to the second floor. I followed Tanya into a large den where a fire place was actively burning. She motioned to a couch, then sat down herself. I followed and took a seat. Looking around, I asked,

"Are the Cullens here?"

"No," she answered, "They left for Jacksonville a few days ago. Haven't heard from them yet."

I felt like my chest was being tightened. I had driven all the way to Alaska, and Edward wasn't here. I could have cried, but I didn't for two reasons. One was because I didn't want Tanya to see me that way, and the second was because I couldn't cry anymore. Instead, I composed myself and asked,

"Why did they go to Jacksonville? That sounds a little difficult." I had to make it seem like I didn't know everything that had happened, that I wasn't Bella Swan who had just been captured by another vampire and changed a few days ago. I was Sarah, whoever she may be, and that's what Tanya believed. If I was able to get some answers this way, then so be it.

"Well, it's a bit complicated. You said you lived with them a year ago?" I nodded, and she continued, "Than you must know Bella Swan. Edward is in love with her."

I nearly fell over at my name. I had never considered the fact that by lying about who I was, I would have to have met myself. That didn't even make any sense. But I just nodded, then shook my head.

"No…no, that's not right. You said Edward _is_ in love with her. Edward left her, he doesn't love her anymore." Tanya laughed a little.

"That's only partially right. Edward did leave her, but not because he doesn't love her. He wanted to protect her from himself. He had this ridiculous idea that he was constantly putting her in danger, so it was better for Bella to have a normal human life than a precarious one with a vampire. He's still very much in love with her though." Her face fell suddenly, and when she spoke, it was almost in a whisper.

"He's changed since he left her. He used to be so full of life…not literally of course, but in his way he was alive. But now, it's like…" she stared out the window, where it had begun to rain. I was frozen in shock. "It's hard to explain, unless you've ever been in love before. He was whole before, but now that she's gone, he's become only half of what he is. Not only that, but now that half of him is gone, he's found that he can't survive without being whole. You can see in his eyes that he's empty."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Edward still loved me? That wasn't possible, was it? I mean, he had told me that-

"But recently Alice got a vision." Tanya continued, oblivious to my internal battles, "She saw Bella in Jacksonville with another vampire. He had a panic attack and went down there to go get her. He said that he would beg for her to take her back if he had to. The whole family went with him. I hope that those two are back together. She doesn't know what she's missing if she says no to him." She added mysteriously, and I wondered if she was jealous. But that was a fleeting thought.

Edward loved me. He had gone to Jacksonville to ask for forgiveness. That didn't seem possible. He had told me that he didn't love me. But Tanya said he lied to protect me. That seemed exactly like him, sacrificing himself for others. I barely managed to get out,

"Do you know when he's coming back?"

"Like I said, I haven't heard from them so I don't know if-"

She was cut off as someone knocked on the door. We both looked toward the entrance. We had been so wrapped up in conversation that we hadn't heard anyone approach the house. She got up with an 'excuse me' and went to answer the door. I heard voices talking, but I didn't listen because I didn't want to be rude. I could have easily eavesdropped, with my hearing they could have been speaking right next to me, but it was impolite.

I lay down on the couch and closed my eyes. I tried to remember how to breathe correctly. This was getting to be too much.

"Sarah," I heard Tanya say, and I sat up and opened my eyes, "There's a man at the door named Brendon. He wants to talk to you. Do you know him?"

But Brendon didn't even wait for an answer. He just burst into the room and glared at me. My eyes grew wide, and with anger in his voice he spat out at me,

"Bella, we need to talk."

Boy, was that an understatement.

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You can actually find Tanya's house on Google Maps. On satellite mode, it's the one on the very end of Lester Road with the long driveway. If you live there, thanks for letting me use your house! And also, that is really creepy that you're reading this story! Please review, I didn't get many last chapter and I nearly cried! (Not really, but I might! Is that a risk you're willing to take?!)


	24. Power

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenire Meyer

My internet is being a bum, so I'm uploading this from my best bud/editor's laptop. It's good to have friends! Enjoy!

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"Um, hi Brendon…this is awkward now isn't it?" I said to him as he stared me down. I tried to smile, but his glare remained the same. Tanya looked rather confused and surprised, and her tense posture made it seem like she was ready to either bolt or stop us if a fight broke out. Brendon certainly seemed up for one. He broke the silence first.

"You elbowed me in the chest, and then almost ran me over with the rental Mercedes." His voice tried to not give any emotion away, and ended up sounding very strained. I glanced away and looked out the window.

"Yeah, about that…um, I'm sorry?" His glare intensified. "Well, what do you want me to say Brendon?!" I practically yelled at him. His answer was quick.

"Bella, I want you to give up this stupid notion of finding Edward and come-"

"It's not stupid! And I'm not going anywhere with you!"

"Oh, yes you are! I'm not going to put innocent people in danger because of your ego and overconfidence in your abilities!"

"I am not overconfident, and I do not have an ego! And for your information, Edward came to Jacksonville to find me and tell me he loves me! Tanya told me so!"

"And how can you be sure of that? You don't even know this woman!"

"I trust her more than you right now! The Cullens told me all about-"

"Wait a second." Tanya interrupted. By this point I was standing up chest to chest with Brendon, both or our hands balled into fists. We both looked over to Tanya at the same time. Realization had dawned on her face. "Are you Isabella Swan?" she asked. I sighed and nodded.

"Yeah, I'm Bella. Sorry about the whole Sarah thing. I just needed to make sure that Edward would see me. I didn't know that-"

"You can't be Bella." She simply stated. I gave her a quizzical look. "The Isabella Swan that Edward loves is human, not a vampire."

"That's _his_ fault." I said, throwing a glare at Brendon. He looked down, ashamed. "After he kidnapped me from Jacksonville, things got a little out of hand and he bit me. Edward doesn't know, so that's why-"

"So you and Edward didn't meet up in Jacksonville after all?" She was getting into a really annoying habit of interrupting my sentences. This time I nodded, so she wouldn't be able to cut me short.

"Well in that case-" But this time it was her sentence that was disrupted as the front door of the house burst open and a boy and girl walked in, arguing loudly.

"No, you can not keep a caribou as a pet! That's insane!" the girl yelled furiously throwing her backpack on the stairs. The boy did the same and yelled back at her.

"I could do it, unless you went and killed it!" She gaped at him and eventually yelled back,

"Are you accusing me of having less self control than you?! Do I have to remind you who is the older sibling is in this-" Tanya cleared her throat and the two looked over.

"We have guests." Tanya stated, "Please excuse my children's rude behavior. I'm sure they're most embarrassed." This was said with a stern look at the two children and they only responded with mischievous grins.

The girl was a short, slender, dirty blonde. Her hair was short, a little less than shoulder length, and was neatly pulled into two cute ponytails. Her appearance was one of a freshman in high school. She reminded me of Alice in a way. They boy seemed to be the opposite of her. He was tall, muscular, and had very short black hair. He looked slightly older than the girl, but I suspected she was older than the other sibling, based on the argument.

"You must be Lillian and Evander." I said. Everyone in the room stared at me like I had grown a second head. Then Brendon asked,

"Bella, can you read minds or something?"

"Yeah, like Edward!" Lillian asked expectantly.

"Not really," I said, as the internal battle raged inside me at Edward's name, "I didn't know where Tanya lived, so I went to the school to see if they had an address. The lady at the desk thought we were related."

Everyone's face fell, but only for a moment. Suddenly, Lillian perked up and ran over to me. She grabbed both my hands in hers, and bounced on her toes. I could hear her asking my name, but suddenly the room grew blurry.

I saw a young girl holding the hands of a man. They wore the clothes of a much older era, and I felt like I was watching a scene from _Gone with the Wind_. I realized with shock that the girl I was looking at was the human Lillian.

They sat in a garden on an old iron bench. The man was whispering something in her ear, and she was giggling. Then he placed a kiss on her cheek and pulled a small red box from his pocket and got down on one knee. Lillian's face was shocked as I heard the man ask her to marry him.

I felt horrible. My stomach had tightened, my throat blocked up. This was what I had wanted for Edward and I. I had wanted us to love each other forever, in the innocent way people had once. I didn't want to watch anymore, I shook my head and willed myself from this place. My vision went blurry again, and I was back in Tanya's living room. Everyone just stared at me waiting for my answer to Lillian's question that I hadn't heard.

"Um, could you repeat that?" I asked.

"I asked what your name was." Her smile was still plastered to her face.

"Oh, I'm Bella."

"As in Bella Swan? Edward's girlfriend?" Evander asked. I nodded, and Brendon growled. I shot him another look.

"This is great! We're going to be the best of friends! I was going to go to Anchorage to go shopping tomorrow, do you want to come? We can pick you out a whole new wardrobe. I don't know when Alice is getting back so-"

"Were you ever married, Lillian?" I asked.

"Please, just call me Lilly. Anyway, like I was saying, there's this really cute shop on-"

"Were you ever married?" I asked with more authority. She shook her head.

"Nope, none of the vampires around here are any good for me. I liked Edward, but you snatched him first. But this shop, it had this dress in this magazine-"

"What about when you were human?" I questioned, and her rant stopped. Her face turned to stone in an instant, and she stared at me tensely. The rest of the room was silent, and she spoke in a whisper.

"How would you know that?" she took a step back from me, dropping my hands.

"I saw it, this man was sitting with you and he proposed. Did that actually happen?" Her face grew very angry.

"Stay out of my head!" At that she ran upstairs. Evander and Tanya just stared at me in shock.

"What did I do?" I questioned, and they both shrugged.

"Lilly never spoke about her human life. We figured she just forgot. Apparently not…" Evander mumbled. Brendon came over and looked into my eyes.

"Bella, how did you know that?"

"When she took my hands, the room got all blurry and I just saw it. I didn't know what it was, but I didn't want to watch it anymore. So I pulled back, and then I kind of woke up here." I told him.

"Could this be…" Evander mumbled to himself, "Take my hand Bella." he said, reaching out to me. I took a step back, and he stopped. "Bella, this may be important. You need to see if this only happened to Lilly, or if it's something more. Please, take my hand." With a last hesitant glance, I reached out and grabbed Evander's hand gently.

The same thing happened. Everything blurred, and then I found myself in unknown surroundings. It was very dark, and very cold. I slowly realized I was standing in knee deep snow. It didn't seem to affect me though. I could make out the outline of trees blowing in the harsh wind, but I couldn't feel it. It was as if I was only a ghost, a visitor in this place. Here but not here.

I saw Evander running through the woods. He was a vampire, and it seemed he was hunting. I followed him involuntarily, my legs not moving, just floating through the snow. It was like a movie, I had no say in any actions, I was only a viewer.

Evander kept running for a long time, then stopped. He turned around and seemed to look right through me. At first I thought it _was_ me that he was looking at, because he then walked in my direction. But as he came closer, I found he was looking at something beyond me, made all the more apparent when he walked through my ghostly apparition. My inability to move was the only reason that I didn't flinch.

Again I began to float along with him. He began to slow when he found the body of a person lying in the snow. The boy was shivering, meaning that he was still alive. I then noticed that Evander's eyes were black. He had not found anything to hunt yet. Except for this boy.

Before I could fully comprehend the situation, Evander was at the boy's throat. I tried to scream for him to stop, but my voice was silent. I didn't want to watch anymore, I couldn't watch this boy die. I wanted to leave. As I thought this, the images faded, and I once again found myself looking into Evander's face, holding his hand in the living room.

I didn't know what to say. He waited, expectant, before asking,

"Are you back?" I nodded, "Your eyes turned black and glazed over. They just returned to normal a second ago." I stood there, dumbfounded. "What did you see?" he asked.

"I saw…you." I answered slowly, "You were hunting… in a snowstorm …you killed a young boy." His face fell into a deep frown, "Do you remember it?" I asked quietly.

He nodded, "That was the only human I ever killed. I never forgave myself for that…" He let my hand go and walked away, concentration written on his face. "You saw the one thing that I never put behind me, and an important part of Lilly's human life. Maybe you see a person's most powerful memory, the thing that they can't seem to forget."

"Their most powerful memory…" I repeated. Why was I given this power? Edward had said that a person brought their most powerful human trait with them when they became a vampire. But how did this have anything to do with my human life?

The answer was clear: Edward. He was the most powerful memory anyone could hold. All of the memories I had held onto so dearly were of him. I had become a master of using my memories to give myself hope. It only seemed right that in my next life, the memories of others would be insignificant compared to what I had withstood. I could see their memories because mine had been so much more powerful and important, and I had used them for hope. And now, perhaps, I could help them, and give them the hope I had held onto. At least, that's what I told myself.

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What do you think of Bella's power? Please review!


	25. Till Death

Twilight and New Moon belogn to Stephenie Meyer.

I'm glad that almost everyone seemed to like Bella's power. Thanks for all the reviews. Here's the next chapter, enjoy!

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I knocked softly on Lilly's door. She had locked herself inside her room and refused to see anyone. I knew it was my fault, and I didn't want her to suffer because of me. It seemed like I was doing that to a lot of people lately.

"Lilly?" I asked hesitantly. She suddenly threw the door open and yelled,

"GO AWAY!"

Then she slammed the door, leaving me with a shocked expression plastered on my face. My new ultrasensitive hearing caused my brain to want to explode. I regained my composure and once again knocked. When no answer came form the inside, I leaned against the door and slid down to sit on the floor. I heaved a sigh and thought of how to begin.

"Lilly, I know you're in there, and I know you can hear me. I just want you to listen. I'm not quite sure how I offended you, but I'm sorry. I didn't mean to invade your personal memories or anything. You were the first person that has ever happened to before. Please, don't be mad at me."

When she yanked open the door, I fell over onto my back. I lay on the floor staring up at her as she yelled down to me.

"That was highly personal! And then you had to go and announce it to everyone! I don't know what you saw, but you had no right to publicize it!"

I stood myself up as she slammed to door in my face. I had the urge to rip the darn thing off its hinges so she couldn't close it anymore. I restrained myself and tried to continue calmly.

"Lilly, I didn't do it on purpose. I didn't even know that I could do it! If you don't want me to, I'll never tell anyone what I saw. Please, just forgive me and come out." I pleaded with her. The door opened up a crack. Through the sliver I could see her eye examining me. Her voice spoke to me softly.

"Do you promise that you won't tell anyone, Bella?"

I nodded to her, "I promise."

Her hand shot out of the room suddenly and snatched my wrist. I was pulled into the room roughly and the door was shut behind me. Then suddenly, Lilly was hugging me. I was unsure of what to do, so I just patted her on the back. She pulled me in front of her.

"I've never had someone I could tell before…" She told me. "I never thought anyone would understand…"

"What is there to understand?' I asked her, and she gave me a quizzical look.

"What exactly did you see?" She asked, and I informed her about everything I saw in my vision. She nodded, "I get it now. You didn't see everything I thought you did."

"What did you think I saw?"

"Well, that man who proposed…I did marry him." She answered with a sly grin, and I couldn't help but smile back. But her face quickly fell. "I got very sick after our wedding, though. My husband, Hayden, owned a plantation in Mississippi. There was a sickness that ran through the plantations in the area, including ours. I caught it, and became very ill. Hayden stayed by my side the whole time."

She left me and went to look out the window. She stared outside for awhile, and I just waited for her to continue. I didn't want to disrupt her train of thought. She eventually resumed her story.

"There was a man, who happened to be very beautiful, who had recently moved into the community. My husband had hired him to help in the house. He helped me as a servant, but it turned out he had alternative motives. When everyone had cleared out of the house, and my husband was away to get me medicine, he stole me away and changed me."

"I'm sorry..." I whispered, not sure what to say. She laughed, but it was hard and short.

"What are you sorry for? It's not you fault." She sighed and continued. "After I was changed, I rebelled against what I was. I refused to believe that I had changed into a monster. I returned home and went to see Hayden. He was the first human I had encountered as a newborn vampire. I was…I could help it…."

She stopped speaking then, and fell onto the floor. She was sobbing hysterically. I walked over to her and put my arms around her. She tried to continue with her story between her sobs, but I was pretty sure I knew how this was going to end.

"I didn't want to…I didn't…" She cried, her tearless face contorted with pain. "I didn't mean to kill him…I loved him!"

I missed her words after that, as my vision blurred again at her touch and I began to see what she spoke of. I saw her eyes, a dark onyx black, as she walked to her husband. His confusion, her lust for his blood, the final moments of his life as she attacked. I didn't want to watch this anymore, so I pulled back to reality. Lilly was still sobbing in my arms, and I spoke softly to her.

"I can see it Lilly, don't worry. It's okay; you didn't mean to…you didn't mean to do it."

We sat there together for what seemed to be a long time. I realized that we weren't that different. Both of us had lost the love of our lives because of what we were. Me, because I was a normal human, and her, because she was a bloodthirsty vampire. Though we had been opposites, we lived out the same scenario.

After some time, Lilly stopped crying and we walked together downstairs and talked about our lives. We spoke about where she had gone from Mississippi, how I fell in love with Edward, how she met her new family in Denali, all the events that led up to now. We sat through the whole day and night. Some of the rest of the family walked through at times, but no one else sat down with us.

By the end, we had reached her promise. We were now the best of friends. Tanya walked in as we were discussing something about the weather in Jacksonville. She was holding a phone.

"Sorry to interrupt ladies, but I wanted to let you know Lilly, Laurent is coming home tonight. He's on the phone right now."

"Oh! Let me talk to him!" she said, jumping up and grabbing the phone. She rushed off into another room, not to be rude, I suppose. It didn't matter to me. My mind was suddenly preoccupied.

"Um, Tanya? Who's Laurent?" I asked, not sure what to expect. Could he be the same?

"Oh, Laurent is a friend of ours. He usually just comes and goes when he wants. He first came here about a year ago, but we haven't seen him in awhile. I think he once said he knew the Cullens. Did you know him as well?"

Oh yes, I knew him. He had to be the same Laurent, there was no question. He had been an enemy when we first met him, only leaving because he didn't want to face James. The question was, now that James was gone, how would Laurent react? I was a vampire now, and he harbored no hatred toward me. At least, that's what I told myself.

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Did any of you see _that_ coming? And I hope you learned a little about Lilly. She's...well...she's fluff. Sorry! The next chapter will get deeper into the plot, and the end will have a big surprise! Thanks for reading, please review!

And for all of you who care, I'm working on my own little Halloween special, it should be up soon!


	26. Existence

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

Many people have been asking about Edward lately. So I thought we needed to explain what he's been up to for the last few chapters. Here's chapter 26, Enjoy!

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I lay on the floor of my room, staring at the white ceiling. I hadn't moved for…I'm really not sure how long I had been lying there. The days, hours, minutes, they all passed by without any real meaning. Just like my existence. It no longer held any meaning.

Bella was dead…

Bella was gone…

Bella would never smile again…

Bella would never cry again…

Bella would never laugh again…

Bella was dead…

Bella was dead…

These thoughts continued to run through my mind endlessly. There was no more point in breathing, no point in speaking, or moving, or existing for that matter. The thoughts of my family filtered through my mind like a language I didn't know, words connected in sentences that made no sense. Sometimes they came into my room and tried to talk to me, but I never responded, never moved, never even heard what they said. It didn't matter anymore.

Because Bella was dead.

I've heard people say that when someone dies, they can't seem to comprehend the death. It takes them awhile to fully grasp the concept that that person will never speak to them again, or come to another day of work. But it wasn't like this for me. I knew she was gone, I believed she had left this world. Was it because I had always accepted the fact that she was human, and would die someday? Was it because I had watched as her heart slowed and stopped?

This fact still vexed me. Why had I been forced to watch as everything that held meaning in my world was ripped from me? While my heart, cold and frozen as it was, was shattered into a million pieces? How was I even able to see her, wherever she may have been.

Someone walked into my room as my thoughts perplexed me. The sat down next to me, then leaned back to lie on the floor, their head next to mine. I didn't acknowledge them, I just continued to stare at the ceiling. They were talking or saying something, but none of the words registered. Their noise ended suddenly as I was picked up and thrown against a wall.

"Listen to me dammit!" Alice yelled, and I heard her words for the first time. I didn't move from my crumpled position on the floor.

"Why?" I whispered to her. She walked over and picked me up by the collar and held me against the wall. I gazed at the floor, not wanting to look her in the eye.

"You can't go on like this Edward!" she yelled, "You're killing yourself!"

"Good, I want to die." I whispered.

"Not like that! You're…I can't explain it! You're dying inside!" She yelled, but I slowly slid back down to stand on the floor. Her hands remained at my collar, and she was shaking her head. "You lie up here in your room everyday! Jasper can't even be in the house, he's going crazy! Emmett has stopped laughing, Esme's locked herself in her room, Carlisle is trying to keep everyone from going insane, and I'm so miserable I can't see anything!" Her last part surprised me.

"You…can't see…"

"No! I can't see anyone's future! Do you know how hard that is?! To not know what's going to happen to us! Everyone's miserable, it's not just you! I've lost a sister, Esme's lost a daughter, we've all lost something!" She let me go and sank to the floor. I realized that Carlisle and Rosalie were standing in the doorway. Emmett was behind them.

"She's right, Edward." Carlisle said, "We all have lost her, we all have lost some one we thought was going to be part of the family, who already was part of the family. We need to get through this together."

Emmett walked over and helped Alice up. I just stood there as he walked her over to the couch. Rosalie went to go sit with them as Carlisle walked over to me.

"I don't know, Carlisle…I just don't know if anything is worth doing know…" I whispered, and he took me into an embrace.

"What would Bella have wanted you to do?" He asked simply.

I had never thought about that question before. What would Bella have wanted me to do if she knew this was going to happen? When I had told her that if she died, I was planning to end my existence, she was appalled. So now, I couldn't do that.

"Bella would have wanted me to…be happy." I choked out. And Carlisle nodded as he led me to the window. The rest of the family watched me intently, waiting for my next words. "Bella would have wanted me to keep living, and to…exist."

"She would have wanted us all to continue, to keep living." Esme said as she walked in the room. Carlisle left me to walk over and embrace her.

I didn't want to keep living. I didn't want to go through my life like I had before she had showed me everything that life could be. I wanted to wrap myself in a curtain of darkness, I wanted to stop feeling. I wanted to close my eyes and make the pain in the abyss where my heart had once been go away. But Bella wouldn't want that. She would want me to keep feeling, because that would mean I was alive.

"So what do we do now?" Emmett asked.

"I think we need to leave here. Forks isn't going to help any of us right now." Carlisle said calmly. Esme nodded in his arms.

So we packed the cars. I stood in my room one last time and gazed out the window. How was I supposed to be happy when all I ever wanted wasn't something I could never have again?

"Are you ready to go Edward?" I heard Carlisle ask from downstairs.

"Where are we going?" I asked quietly, knowing he could still hear.

"Alaska, then we'll think about our next step."

But I already new what my next step would be. Brendon had to die. I was going to find him, and I was going to make sure he never smiled again, he never cried again, he never laughed again. Everything he had taken from Bella, I would take from him.

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Go go Edward! Chapter's from his perspective always seem to be shorter than others. But he's Edward, so that's okay! Please review, cause everyone knows that I care what you think!

And for those who would like to know, my Halloween Special is up. I put it up on Halloween (gasp!), and it's just a little thank you for all my readers. You know, for being awesome! Take a look if you have a minute!

And a very happy birthday to one of my good friends spottedthief313! You rock!


	27. Returning Past

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer

So, as many of you good readers know, the last few chapters were kind of fluffy. But this is it. The lid is being blown off the hatch! (hehehe, I can't wait till Lost starts running again...) This story is (sadly) reaching a climax, and eventually an ending. But there is a _lot_ that has to happen before that! Enjoy chapter 27!

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"You know this Laurent?" Brendon asked.

I nodded. I thought that he had a right to know some of my past. Especially the part that was about to came back to haunt me.

"He was in this coven with two other vampires. One named James and his mate named Victoria."

"So what's the big deal? He's just another vampire, right?" Brendon asked.

"Well, I _think_ he's alright. It's just that…well…"I twiddled my thumbs, "He didn't do anything, but James and Victoria did kind of try to kill me…"

Brendon's eyes turned a deep black, "He did what?" His hands turned into fists, and I noticed.

"No! I said he didn't do anything! It was the other members of his coven!"

"Still, he had something to do with it." His muscles remained tight, and his balled fists clenched. He turned to look out the window, trying to hide the anger in his eyes.

"Your not going to do something stupid, are you?" I asked, and he turned back to me, confused. "I know you well enough by now to understand that this is going to lead to something bad. You kind of like to overreact."

He chuckled, "No, I'm fine. I won't do anything. I think I'm just going to go take a walk." And then he got up and left. I let out a huge breath of air and leaned back against the couch. Dealing with Brendon was like a rollercoaster. You never knew what was around the bend. Lilly walked into the room then.

"Guess who just got back?!" she squeaked in anticipation. I shrugged, but I knew all too well whose name she was about to say. "Laurent!"

And then a memory of my past stepped in. It seemed irrational that I should expect a change, but all the same, I thought he would look different. Exactly the same as when we last parted, he gazed at me with a bemused expression. His black hair and pale skin stood in amazing contrast to each other, and it was only now, when my vision had advanced and vampire's beauty no longer stunned me, that I realized that Laurent was actually rather odd looking. He was of course beautiful, that was a given at this point. The contrast of his hair and skin, the general way he stood, none of it seemed to fit together correctly. I was again amazed at the new power that I had. Something that had once seemed perfect, I could now see the flaw. There was something else that I was missing as well. I knew that I hadn't missed it, my eyesight wouldn't let me. But the fact just wasn't clicking in my mind.

I also noticed that he had a very lovely vampire draped on his arm. Her auburn hair cascaded down her back in large curls. She gazed at me with intense hatred, and I realized it was because Laurent was staring at me with such intense concentration.

"Bella Swan?" he asked, but instead of surprise, he sounded frightened. I had no idea why.

"Hi, Laurent. This is rather odd, isn't it? How have you been?" I asked politely. He never took his eyes off me. I glanced over at Lilly. She didn't seem happy, about him staring at me and about how the other girl kept her arm around Laurent's waist.

"Fine." He answered me simply. There was a large awkward silence in the room. I cleared my throat and got up to walk over. I held out my hand to the other vampire.

"My name is Bella. It's nice to meet you." She glared at my hand, obviously disgusted. I slowly lowered my hand and put it in my pocket. She didn't say anything, she just pulled Laurent upstairs. I looked at Lilly when they were gone and whispered low enough that it would be hard for anyone else to hear,

"What did I do?"

She shook her head, "That's just Irina. She can be a real-"

"I can hear you, you know!" someone shouted from upstairs. I realized it was Irina. I giggled as Lilly rolled her eyes.

"See what I mean? She and Laurent are together. But I know deep down, he and I are meant to be together!" and she twirled into the living room and fell upon the couch. I spent the rest of the day watching TV with Lilly. It eventually hit me that she had been skipping school, but it didn't really matter to me. What a few days of classes when you have an eternity of high school ahead of you?

Laurent eventually came downstairs, without Irina. Lilly ran over to him.

"Laurent! How have you been?! Irina stole you away so fast." She pouted, and it made me laugh.

"If you don't mind, Lilly, I'd like to talk to Bella alone for a second." Her pout deepened into a more pronounced frown. She just nodded and walked out of the room. With a last sad glance back at me, she dashed up the stairs.

"Hello Laurent." I said shyly. He just stood on the other side of the room and looked me up and down. Eventually he stopped at my eyes.

"I see a lot has happened since our last parting. You've certainly changed." I noticed the double meaning he implied with the word 'change'. I tried to stay casual.

"Yeah, this wasn't something exactly planned though. It's a long story." I shrugged. My attempts at calming the situation were shot down. For some reason, Laurent remained very tense. He couldn't honestly be afraid of me, could he? But there was fear in his eyes. "Is something wrong, Laurent?" I questioned, and his expression became shocked. "You seem like you're not very comfortable. I know last time we saw each other the situation was rather strained, but did I do something-"

"No, no. It's just…I never thought that you would be a vampire when we next met. This complicates thing considerably…"

"Why would it complicate things? I would think it makes everything so much simpler." I said, and he just shook his head.

"Forgive me, I'm just thinking out loud. It means nothing. May I ask where Edward is?" he asked, changing the subject.

"We haven't exactly met up yet. He left, a few months after the James incident. There was some miscommunication, and I accidentally got changed by a friend after I moved to Jacksonville. Well, no technically _in_ Jacksonville, it was in Canada. I was trying to…anyway, like I said, long story. I'm looking for Edward now."

"So Edward is not with you?" he asked. I gave him a quizzical look.

"That's what I just said."

"Just making sure."

"You're saying a lot of things that aren't making any sense. Care to clarify?" He took a deep breath and shook his head.

"It's a long story." He said simply, and then he walked out of the room. I jumped up and followed him.

"Wait, you can't just leave me at that and-" but it was too late that I realized I had grabbed his hand to try and stop him. My vision blurred and changed to a dark place. I looked around and saw an apparition of a person whom I had never thought I would see again.

Victoria. She stood not ten paces from me, talking to Laurent. My vision was suddenly cut off as my grip on Laurent's wrist abruptly ended. He had pulled away and walked out the door. I realized with dread the fact about him that I had missed earlier. Like the rest of him, his eyes had not changed since the last time I had seen him. They were still blood red.

"Bella, are you okay?" A voice asked from behind me, and I turned to see Brendon with a concerned look on his face. I shook my head.

"No, I'm terrified." His face deepened into dread as he came over and took my hand. He led me back into the living room and sat me on the couch.

"Is it Laurent? Lilly told me he had come back." I started to nod, but then shook my head again.

"I'm not afraid of Laurent. Well…I am afraid of him, but not as much afraid as I am of Victoria."

"She's here as well?" His voice remained monotone.

"I think so. I took Laurent's hand, and I saw a memory of him and Victoria. I don't know why that would be so powerful, unless she was actually here, and she was planning to finish what James started." I looked at my hand where the scar James left had once been. Of course it was gone now, my flawless skin taking its place, but the memory of it lingered.

"She would try to hurt you?" I nodded, distracted by thoughts of how this could have happened. Why now, when everything was finally starting to make sense?

"Go ask Lilly if she knows Victoria. Maybe this is just a misunderstanding." I looked at him and he smiled. "I'm sure everything will be okay."

"Promise?"

"I promise. Go talk to Lilly."

So I got up and walked toward the stairs. With my foot on the first step, I felt Brendon's hand slip into mine. I turned back to see his staring at me intently.

"I know you don't care about me the way I care about you, but please understand that I am never going to let anything bad ever happen to you." He told me, and I felt a lump form in my throat.

"I know Brendon. You're a good friend." I was a little taken aback, but I knew that his words were true. That included _all_ of his words. I turned and walked up into Lilly's room. She was listening to her iPod, so I ripped it out of her ears.

"Lilly, do you know who Victoria is?"

"Umm, no. And by the way, I was listening to that."

"Sorry, I just had to ask. It's important."

"Why, is she out to getcha?" she asked with a giggle.

"Well, that is a distinct possibility…"

"You serious?" I nodded.

"She's a friend of Laurent's, and she tried to kill me once. I think she may try to again."

"Oh…" She seemed stunned for a moment. "Did you tell Brendon?"

"He's downstairs. He told me to ask you if Victoria had been here."

"He's not downstairs." I was taken aback.

"What?"

"I can't hear anyone downstairs. He must have left."

If my heart was still pounding, it would have skipped a beat. I ran downstairs and looked around frantically. Lilly had been right, he wasn't here. I had been too preoccupied to hear him leave. Lilly followed me down the stairs slowly. I fell to my knees and put my head in my hands.

"Bella, what's wrong?"

"Brendon doesn't think about consequences when he does things. He acts without thinking…how could this have happened?" I looked to her for support, but she only seemed confused.

"Bella, I don't understand. Where's Brendon?"

"I think he went after Laurent."

"Which means?"

"That he is going to run into Victoria." I stood up and headed toward the door. Lilly grabbed my wrist.

"What are you doing?"

"What else? I'm going after him."

* * *

Dun dun DUN! Don't you just want to start the Mission Impossible theme music right now? I'd _love_ to know what you all think is going to happen! I'm surr you all have different opinions about what should happen to poor little Brendon! Please review!


	28. Brendon's Fate  Author's Note

**This author's note no longer applies. I am leaving it in so that people don't get confused with some things that I say in future chapters. Also, if I got rid of this and placed the new chapter in its place, people who reviewed on this chapter once will not be able to leave reviews a second time. So just skip this, and keep reading. Thanks!**

**THIS IS** (no longer)** _VERY_ IMPORTANT!**

Greeting readers!

Before you go to yell at me about how this is a stupid author's note which everyone hates with a passion, because you get all excited because the email says update, and then it's just the author rambling about their personal lives, hear me out.

I had the story planned, I really did. I talked it over with friends, decided what was going to happen, and then I sat down wrote the story. Turns out things aren't going as intended. And it's all Brendon's fault.

So I am using the power of the internet (Oh, how great it is!) to figure out this predicament! The recent addition of the polling feature has given me an idea. Go onto my profile and vote on the fate of Brendon. Shall he live, or shall he die? It's up to you people! I don't know how long I'm going to keep the poll up, but I want to put the next chapter up during Thanksgiving break. So hurry!

Thank you for your time! The actual poll is at the very top of my profile. Feel free to yell at me now. If you vote, then I can take it!


	29. Casualties

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

sniff I'm so happy! You all responded (well, not _all_, that would have given me a heart attack) and voted on Brendon's fate. Thank you so much! I'll tell you that it was very close! Enjoy!

* * *

I ran.

I followed his scent, mixed with that of Laurent's, in a strait path towards him. I propelled myself off the ground in the direction I knew he would be.

As I ran, I realized what I was doing was insane. I was going to try to save the life of the man that had taken my life away. Brendon had kidnapped me, taken me from my family and friends, and then made certain that I could never see them again. I should hate him, totally and completely.

So why did all of that seem insignificant as I thought about what Victoria was going to do to him?

Because he was a friend, because, even though changing me into a vampire was something that was irreversible and unforgivable, had allowed me to spend eternity with Edward. Anything that did that demanded a return favor.

I ran alone as Lilly informed the rest of her family of the situation. I didn't really know what I was going to do. I had no plan in my head, other than to find Brendon and drag him back to the house. If he had reached Laurent and Victoria by then…I would have to wing it at that point.

I reached a clearing and looked around. I knew Brendon had been here, I could still smell him, but his scent seemed to have stopped, it didn't lead anywhere. I twirled around in circles trying to decide where to go next. I couldn't see him, the foliage was too thick. I suddenly heard a crash, like a tree had fallen. I followed the sound, again running through the forest, never growing tired.

I emerged on a large cliff face, the edge dropping down an immeasurable difference. I saw the tree lying on the ground, but there was no one around. Out of no where, Brendon flew through the air and hit the collapsed tree. The tree made a huge cracking sound as it split in half.

"Brendon!" I screamed as I ran over to him. His eyes were filled with fear and shock as he saw me.

"Bella! What are you doing here!?" I stopped halfway to him.

"I'm here to stop you from getting yourself killed!"

"You're a little too late for that." Another voice said.

Laurent walked out of the woods that Brendon had just been thrown from. He had something in his hands, but I couldn't grasp what it was. It seemed too unreal to be true. It didn't sink in until he threw it at me and the object landed at my feet. It was an arm.

Brendon's arm.

I looked in shock over to Brendon as he stood up. Sure enough, the left side of his body was missing an important limb. I couldn't throw up, so I did the next best thing. I fell onto my knees and dry-heaved. When I looked up, the two vampires had again disappeared into the woods. Brendon's arm remained on the ground. I got up and slowly approached it. When I reached the severed limb, I screamed and fell back onto the rocks.

It _moved_.

The arm was now trying to crawl towards the woods. I sat in horror as the appendage tried in a desperate attempt to reach its host. The fingers were grabbing onto indents in the rock face and pulling it forward. I dry-heaved again.

Closing my eyes, I got up and turned away from the arm. I could still hear it as crawling, so I stumbled into the woods. I caught glimpses of Brendon and Laurent as they fought, moving between the openings between the trees.

It suddenly hit me that there was no noise. The entire wood was completely silent. All I could hear was the gentle sound of Brendon and Laurent's footsteps on the ground, and the crackle of the foliage that the brushed against. No birds were chirping; there were no animals in the surrounding area.

I had heard that when a natural disaster is about to occur, animals have an instinct in them that gives them a forewarning of the event. They somehow know to run before everyone else does. Somehow, the woods saw this coming, this disaster, this clash of the invincible. So now, we were all alone.

They moved with blinding speed, but I saw their attacks with perfect clarity. And it was becoming more and more apparent that Brendon was losing. With only one arm he was at an obvious disadvantage, and Laurent was taking benefit of the fact. He focused attacks on the left side of Brendon's body, so in order to defend, Brendon had to twist around to block with his right, leaving him in an awkward position, or move away from Laurent.

I then realized another sickening truth. Laurent wasn't trying to hurt Brendon. He was trying to move him in a certain direction. He attacked on the left side so that Brendon would move away toward wherever he wanted him to go. Wherever that was couldn't be good.

So instead of joining in the fight, I ran in the direction Laurent seemed to be pushing Brendon. I followed a strait line, not knowing where it led. The trees obscured my vision, and for all I knew I was heading strait into a trap.

When I reached the end of my invisible line, I ended up on another cliff edge much like the first. But two things were different, one good and one bad. One was that there was no arm lying on the ground crawling towards the woods. That was good. The other was that, instead of an arm, Victoria stood in its place, just as terrifying, just as frightening.

Very very bad.

She scared me just as much as she had when I was human. She hadn't noticed me hiding in the tree line yet, but her stance was tense. She stood with her hands at her sides, and they were clenched into fists. No part of her moved except her eyes, they darted around resting on no object for less then a second. She seemed ready to spring at the slightest chance of movement.

Her eyes transfixed me. They were so odd, moving so quickly, never seeming to rest. They were black, of course, but it only added to the mystery of them. Suddenly, they stopped moving. It shocked me, the lack of movement from something that seemed so wild. I didn't even take in what the eyes were looking at for a moment. But when it did, it hit me like a brick. She was staring at _me_.

There was nothing I could do. I stepped out of the wooded area into the daylight. My skin sparkled like diamonds as I walked towards the deadly vampire in front of me. For one of the first times in my life, I felt strong and beautiful. I felt like a commanding presence. For about a second and a half. Then I realized this was Victoria I was up against, and the happy feelings flew strait out the window.

Victoria only glared at me, her eyes focused on my face.

"Waiting for me?" I tried to ask casually, but my voice was a whisper and it cracked slightly at the end, making the commanding air I had wanted to put out vanished. I waited for her to respond.

"Why would I wait for you?" she asked, and I almost fell over. Her voice was not anything like what I had expected it to be. It was high and musical, almost like a young girl's would be. Her outward appearance was harsh, her hair wild around her, her clothes torn, frayed, and dirty. It was hard to imagine that such a melodious voice came from such a cruel person.

"You and Laurent are looking for me, aren't you?" I asked, confused.

"How do you know Laurent?" she asked, her eyes narrowing. Her voice once again wanted to make me run away. It was disturbing.

"He was in your coven. You know, with James." Something wasn't fitting together.

"So? What is your point?"

"You tried to kill me…and you're after me again…aren't you?" her eyes narrowed even further this time, then suddenly grew very wide. Her mouth opened slightly, and a few words managed to escape her lips. She sounded like some one had knocked all the air out of her.

"You're her…but…no…this wasn't supposed to happen…"

But whatever the point she was about to was interrupted by Brendon. He came flying out of the tree line, to land rolling across the rocky cliff. Laurent walked out onto the rocks and didn't acknowledge either Victoria or my presence. Brendon used his one arm to hoist himself back onto his feet. His clothing was torn, and a large gash ran down his face. It wasn't bleeding, and the skin seemed to be reattaching itself together. I was reminded of the arm, crawling towards the woods, trying to get to its host.

Laurent didn't seem to be quite as bad, but I noticed he favored his left leg as he walked. Neither of the vampires were breathing heavily, and both seemed very calm. Victoria's voice broke the sudden silence.

"What the hell do you think you are doing?"

Many things then seemed to happen at once. First, Laurent turned his head and looked over to Victoria as she spoke. Brendon, seeing Laurent's distraction, crouched down and launched himself forward. Victoria, seeing this all unfolding, also propelled herself forward at almost the exact same time. She roughly shoved Laurent to the ground and planted herself firmly in his place. Brendon's momentum would not let him stop, so he kept continued full tilt at Victoria.

When they collided, she grabbed his good arm, pulled him forward even harder, and tripped him. He lost balance, and Victoria took the opportunity to grab a fistful of his hair. The she pulled, hard.

I'm not sure exactly what happened next. I don't remember it very clearly. I think some one screamed, whether it was me or Brendon I'll never be sure. I know that after that scream, I fell onto my knees and dry-heaved. The scene kept running through my head, over and over again. In one quick movement, she had beheaded him. I'm pretty sure I dry-heaved again.

It was only when Victoria started walking toward the cliff edge that I looked up. Before I could move to stop her, she had launched his body and his severed head over the edge. I watched as his body fell. I couldn't look at his head.

I had stood there the whole time like a deer in the headlights. I just stared at the edge for what seemed like forever trying to comprehend what had just happened. In my peripheral vision I saw Laurent stand up. He and Victoria began whispering to each other, and then Laurent pointed to me. And all I could do was kneel there.

"You…you threw him off the cliff…you just threw him…"I mumbled to them. Then it hit me.

Brendon was dead. Brendon was not going to come back. Brendon was gone.

Forever.

* * *

Final Poll - total of 50 votes, live had 21, die had 29. It was oh so close. Live was actually ahead for a while, and I wrote out the chapter as such, but then it changed and I had to go back and rewrite it.

Speaking of numbers, if 50 of you voted, why don't I usually get 50 reviews? Hmmmm? Guilt trip! Seriously, please review!


	30. Ashes of the Past

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

So I had written the last chapter and left out a little tiny miniscule detail that **_everyone_** noticed. So here you go everyone, I told you I would fix it, and I did! And I think this is going to be some people's new favorite chapter! Enjoy!

* * *

I couldn't find the power within me to move. Brendon had kidnapped me, changed me, annoyed me to no end, and had almost ruined my life. But he had also given me my new life, a new chance to take back what I had lost. Brendon had killed me, but saved me at the same time.

These thoughts wound through my head as the reality of the situation slowly sank in. Brendon had just been ripped apart and thrown over a cliff. He was gone.

It was then something in me cracked. The things I had been holding back for a long time, the anger, the frustration, the hurt, all suddenly sprang forth from a well deep inside me. My anger flared, and a growl erupted from my chest. Not like the warning growl I had given to Brendon at one time. This was a war cry, a call to battle. I felt the monster inside of me stir, and I welcomed it, and let it control me.

I lunged at Victoria. She was not expecting this response, and I caught her off guard. I knocked her over with such force that the rock beneath her shattered. Laurent grabbed my arm and pulled me up. I grabbed onto his wrist and snapped it.

The rest of the battle is something of a blur. I was so given over to my instinct that my memories and human thoughts no longer were in control. Either that or the scene was so horrible that my mind blocked the memories from me. I do remember being hit by Laurent and flying near the cliff edge. I didn't go over, but it was close. I remember biting Laurent's neck, and pulling off someone's arm. I remember, after Laurent was dead, Victoria made a run for it. She eluded me for awhile, but I eventually found her. I remember that she said James' name, right before I ripped her to shreds.

Before I left the house, Lilly had told me that to actually kill Laurent and Victoria I would have to burn the bodies. She had given me a pack of matches, so I started on lighting a fire with the branches I had knocked off of trees during the fight. I threw their bodies in with out a second glance then walked away as the smoke started to fill the air.

It was now that I walked to the cliff edge and looked over. The drop was enormous; the shear height would have caused a normal person to become dizzy. But I was no longer normal. I began to scale the cliff, moving down slowly and carefully. I was no climber, but with my strength I was able to get a good grip on the rock wall. Even if one arm slipped, my strength allowed me to hold on. It wasn't easy, but it worked. The sun set, and I climbed in complete darkness for the night. When it rose again, I still hadn't reached the bottom, and I was getting impatient. So I let go.

Falling from a cliff edge was a lot different then falling down the center of a staircase in a hotel. To begin, a cliff is bigger than a stairwell, so there's a lot more room to fall. I had made it pretty far down the cliff side, but it was still quite a drop. I realized with dread that I was being an idiot, and I reached out grab onto the cliff again. Unfortunately, I had fallen away from the rock, and could no longer reach it. I braced myself for impact with the ground just before I landed. It didn't hurt me as much as it hurt the ground. The rock shattered beneath me, forming a small crater where I landed.

I stood up slowly and looked at my surroundings. A river was flowing not ten yards from me. It was there that I saw Brendon's body. It was lying half on the ground, his legs dangled in the river. I saw that the fingers on his remaining hand had twitched. I shuddered, but resisted the urge to run. I began to look for his head. The crazy idea had come to mind that I could put him back together, like the scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz.

But the problem was that I couldn't find the rest of him. I looked for quite some time, I even went a little downstream, but I couldn't find anything. I realized with horror that I had taken such a long time to get down the cliff, that Brendon's head had probably floated so far downriver by now that it would be impossible to find.

A finger twitched again, but otherwise Brendon's body was still. I reached down and picked up his hand. For a second, my vision went blurry, and I saw my face, still human, when I came to school the first day in Jacksonville. The vision of the past was fleeting, but strong.

It was at that moment that I returned to reality. Everything that had just happened, everything I had just done, it all settled on me in a single instant. It was like gravity had lessened on me, only to return in full force. I knew what I had to do. I took Brendon's body and, starting a new fire with the last of my matches, burned it. When all that was left of the fire was ashes, I gathered them up and walked to the river. I let the ashes flow through my fingers into the water. This was the only proper burial I could give him. Maybe it would mean something to him and his family.

I stood there for awhile, and watched the river flowing. Memories of Brendon flowed through my mind, and I thought about the last real words he said to me. He had promised that he would never let any harm come to me, and that he knew I would never love him the way he loved me. His words were true; I could never truly love him. But he had been what I needed most at the time, to the very end he had been a true friend. But eventually I became conscious of the fact that I had to climb the cliff to get back up to the top, and I started toward the rock wall.

The climb took a long time, perhaps a day, perhaps more. I focused on nothing but climbing. When I eventually did reach the top, I found the remains of Victoria and James' fire. I spat on it as I walked by. I retraced my steps to find myself on another cliff. Brendon's arm was still lying there, not moving at all. I reached down and picked it up. I had run out of matches, so I would have to burn it when I reached home. I stopped then and thought for a moment; where was my home now?

But I was too tired to think about that. So, I walked back to the house. I didn't feel like explaining this to anyone, so I took my time walking. The sun set and the birds slowly returned. Even in the dark, I found my way. The stars seemed to shine very brightly, but I hardly noticed them at all. I just stared at the ground and walked on. The lights of the house came into focus, and I walked up to the front door without seeming to tell my feet where to go. I heard voices inside, but they didn't matter to me. Everything was very bizarre and unreal, like the world was a horrible reality I had never truly experienced before.

I opened the door and stepped inside, turning around to shut the door behind me. As the lock clicked shut, I heard a voice behind me, a voice I never thought I would hear again.

"Bella?"

The voice was beautiful. It was soft and velvety, but out of breath, like someone had just taken all the air out of it. I was shocked, and I replayed its sound in the silence following it. It was the most wonderful sound in the world to me. I turned slowly, not even sure if the voice I heard was real.

But there they were, my family, the family I left behind, the Cullens, in all their perfection, sitting in front of me, mouths agape, eyes wide. And standing in front of all of them was my whole world, my reason for existing at this moment. Edward stood there, more perfect than any memory of him that I could conjure.

I looked at myself, thinking of what they must see. Here I was, a new vampire, clothes torn and dirty, smelling like smoke, carrying a severed arm. What must they think? Edward whispered my name again, but I barely heard it. It was too much. Seeing them was too much, seeing _him_ was too much, everything was too much to handle.

I collapsed on the ground, sobbing uncontrollably, my dry eyes not shedding a tear. I continued to sob, even when I felt cold arms wrap around me.

* * *

It took twenty nine chapters, but they have been reunited! Feel free to happy dance now. Go ahead, no one's watching... I know you all have opinions about everything that's happened, so please review! Feel free to ask questions as well! REVIEW!!!


	31. Illusion or Reality?

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

Now that many of you are very happy because of Edward's return, I'd like to share with you his point of view during these events. Sorry this came so late, but I've had hectic week. Enjoy!

* * *

Driving to Alaska was pure torture. Even driving at unreasonable speeds, getting from Washington to Alaska took time. I wasn't driving, so there was nothing to occupy my time. All I could do was stare out the window and think.

My main thoughts focused on how I was going to find Brendon. I had already concluded that I was going to kill him; there was no doubt in my mind about that. But the trouble now was finding him. After kidnapping a girl and killing her, he was probably going to try and lie low for awhile, so it could take some time to find him. I tried to find a starting point on where to begin looking.

But there was something else that kept nagging at the back of my mind. It was something I didn't _want_ to think about, and that I didn't _need_ to think about, but something I was extremely afraid of none the less. I was afraid of forgetting.

As a mythical creature, I had better than average memory. I could tell you the address of any of the numerous houses I had lived in over the past hundred years. I could recite each and every of the plays in the entire works of Shakespeare at a moments notice. I had only to play a composition on an instrument once to remember it for years to come.

So why was I afraid that I would forget Bella? Why was I so afraid that I would never be able to bring forth her face, her smile, her voice, from the depths of my memory? All my past experience and knowledge was telling me that I would not ever be able to forget Bella. So why was I afraid that she was going to leave me?

As if hearing my thoughts, Jasper turned to me from the front seat and filled me with a strange calmness. I knew I should not be calm, which brought more panic to me, at the same time he tried to calm me again. It was an odd mix of tranquility and fear.

"Stop it Jasper," I said when I couldn't take it any more, "You're not helping."

"Well you started it. Do you know how difficult it is to sit in this car with you? I want go and throw myself off a cliff right now. Your depression mixed with everyone else's is bombarding me at every second, and I'm helpless to do anything. I wish I could have taken my own car…"

I suddenly felt very guilty for what he had said. I was making everyone else miserable too. Not only that, but they were already miserable themselves. Alice had said it before, we had _all_ lost Bella, she was no longer a sister, and friend, a love, she was really gone. And all I was doing was rubbing it in.

"You know," Jasper said, "The guilt isn't any better than the depression. I still feel like I want to kill myself, but now I want to say sorry beforehand. Can't you think of something happy, like kittens or flowers or something?"

"No," was my simple answer.

Jasper grumbled something to himself and mumbled 'fine' before turning around. Alice, who was driving, had been silent for the whole ride. It took me this long to realize that her usually bubbly personality had been crushed. When she told me that she was no longer having visions, I was skeptical, but she had been telling the truth. Everything that she had once been was gone. Her face was like stone, it never changed to show emotion. This had hurt her almost as much as it had hurt me.

When we finally arrived in Denali, we were all officially about to go insane. Jasper's constant emotional battles, my depression at the thoughts of everyone around me, Alice's constant silence and occasional sob, we all wanted to run in the opposite direction of each other. Stepping out of the car on Lester Drive was as joyous an occasion as it could be. Much to our surprise, Lilly was standing on the front porch.

"Lilly, it's good to see you. Did you know we were coming?" Esme asked. But Lilly raised a finger to her lips, asking for our silence. We gave her quizzical looks, but didn't ask. Sometimes Lilly was like this, her mood swings were legend.

We all walked inside, leaving the luggage in the cars. Irina was pacing in the living room, and Tanya was trying to calm her down. Evander was just watching the entire ordeal with a bored look, but something like panic lied behind his eyes. When we walked in, Tanya stopped talking to Irina and came over to us.

"Oh thank God you're here. Please tell Irina to stop her worrying! She's driving us insane!" She pleaded with us. Irina quickly stepped in.

"I have a perfectly good reason for worrying! That hussy could be doing who knows what to my cupcake right now!" she whined. Lilly suddenly ran in.

"Don't you call her a hussy! She's one of my best friends! No offence Alice..." Alice just starred at the floor. Everyone's thoughts were too jumbled and confused to comprehend, so I just tuned it out. Lilly continued, "And cupcake? Could you not come up with a better name? I would have at least used sugar muffin or something!"

"Sugar muffin?! You are honestly the most childish person I have ever met! No wonder he chose me over you! If you ever-"

"Both of you stop it!" Tanya yelled at the two girls. And they both turned away from each other, and Lilly even crossed her arms. Evander took the moment of silence to cut in.

"Do you want to sit down?" he asked us, waving an arm toward the couches. We all moved quietly to the seats as Irina stormed upstairs. Once we were all sitting, Tanya asked quietly to Lilly,

"Is she back yet?" Lilly shook her head.

"No, I couldn't hear or see her. They must have gone out really far. I'm getting worried, they've been gone for almost three days…" Tanya just sighed and looked over to us.

"Sorry for the mood, we're kind of in the middle of a crisis." It seemed that she finally looked at us then. Her eyes went up and down each of our figures, resting on our faces for only a moment each.

"What happened? You look like hell. Somebody die?" And then Alice burst into tearless sobs. Jasper began to comfort her, Emmett looked like he was about to smack Tanya, Esme's head had fallen into her hands, and Carlisle was gently rubbing her back. Rose just stared at the floor. I quickly scanned her thoughts.

"_Maybe we should leave. Not because we don't love them, but because I don't think any of us can handle this much longer. If I left, Emmett would follow. Edward would hate me for eternity though…"_ and she glanced over at me. When she saw me looking, she quickly turned back to the floor. _"Sorry…" _she thought.

"There's nothing to be sorry about Rosalie." I said to her, getting out of my seat. The entire family looked to me then, and I started for the door. I stopped a few paces away from them. "You don't have to leave. I will. I'm just making everything worse for everyone."

"It's my fault all this happened anyway. If I had never left her in the first place, she would still be here. If I hadn't left, everything would be okay. If I hadn't left-"

"You can't blame yourself for this Edward." Alice said quietly, and I turned to her. Her face remained emotionless, but there was fire in her eyes. "You didn't kill Bella, Brendon did. So don't you dare tell yourself that her death is your fault."

"Wait a second, are you talking about Bella and Brendon?" Tanya asked. Everyone in the room, with the exception of Evander who was still starring out the window, suddenly was completely focused on her.

"How do you know Brendon?" Carlisle asked, but as Tanya was about to answer, Evander whispered,

"She's back."

Everyone looked to him, and then to the door as we heard the handle being turned. And then through the door appeared a hallucination of the greatest degree.

Bella, more beautiful than she had ever been, walked quietly thought the door, the moonlight framing her from the outside. Her eyes were to the floor, and her face was filled with sadness, but she had never been more stunning. I looked her up and down, and her appearance was striking. He clothes were torn and frayed, showing the skin on her arms and legs. Her hair glistened in the few moments that the moonlight hit it before she turned and closed the door. In her hand was an object, and at the same time I figured out what it was, so did Esme, and she let out a small gasp. But nothing could make this moment any more incredible. Seeing her standing before me, and I couldn't stop myself.

"Bella?" I whispered, afraid at her answer. Was she even real? Was this all a horrible and wonderful figment of my imagination? But no, Esme had seen her, the others did also. Bella's name was being repeated in all of their minds like a reel of film, it just kept running in an endless cycle.

Her body stiffened as she heard me. She seemed to deliberate for a moment before turning around to look at me. He eyes grew wide at the sight of all of us. She froze in place, and her gaze was suddenly on me. She looked me in the eyes, held onto them for what seemed to be an immeasurable amount of time, and I noticed with a start that they were pitch black.

Then suddenly she collapsed onto the floor in hysterics. The entire family was in shock, no one moved or said a word. I hadn't even realized that I was moving until I was standing beside her. I leaned down and wrapped my arms around her, and for the first time in a long time, I felt _whole_.

Sitting there on the floor, Bella sobbing uncontrollably with not a single tear rolling down her perfect face, holding her in my arms, I felt better than I had in months. I felt…happy. The feeling I had when I read her letter was nothing compared to this. For years I thought I had understood the emotion of love, I had seen it portrayed and acted out by numerous individuals. But now I knew the feeling, and it was a thousand times better than anything I had seen or heard. Every clichéd thought of romance flew through my mind, but none adequately described the emotion I felt at this very moment. It took me a few seconds to realize that she was saying something.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry…" she was muttering between sobs. I ran my hand up and down her back. She just shook her head and kept muttering apologies.

"Bella, there is nothing to be sorry about. Please stop crying Bella. I love you Bella, everything is going to be okay."

Her sobs continued, but slowed as she looked up at me. Her face, so perfect was filled with hope and confusion as she spoke to me.

"Say it again."

"What?"

But she didn't respond, for I knew the words she wanted to hear.

"I love you Bella."

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Awwww, don't you love happness? This is not the end, there are a few chapters to go in which I would like to wrap some thing s up. Again, sorry this came late, but a busy week mixed with writing up the start of my new story (which may be up soon) has kept me busy. Please REVIEW! That little purple button is calling to you, you know it is...


	32. Eternity

Twilight and New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer.

Now that Edward and Bella are back together, my story is pretty much over. I had intended it to be done two chapters ago, but I felt that some things still needed to be wrapped up. So, my point is, this is the final chapter. So for the last time...Enjoy!

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I couldn't believe what I was hearing. No matter how badly I wished that these words were true, I couldn't bring myself to truly trust them. But everything he said, everything Tanya had told me, it all added up. He truly did love me. So why could I not believe?

His face, inches from mine, was filled with a thousand emotions. His usual façade of calm and indifference was gone. His concern, worry, confusion, hope, all were written on his face with perfect clarity. But there was another emotion there I could not place. One that didn't seem to fit in with the others. I needed to know what it was.

I slowly reached up and placed my hand on his cheek. His concerned face grew blurry as I began to slip into his memories. But it wasn't the same as the other times I had seem some one's past. These memories flew by me in quick procession, a blur of thoughts. Each lasted only a few seconds, but I knew all of them, because I was present in each.

The first was when I had started my first day at Forks High, and all the memory was of was me walking into the lunchroom for the first time. It jumped to that first day in biology, then to when he came back and spoke to me for the first time. Every memory of me was rushing through his mind at the current time. There were simple times, when he had held my hand, gazed into my eyes long enough that I lost track of time, or merely held me in his arms. But slowly they became more complex, more connected together. Because, soon, every memory of him and I was a time when either of us murmured a single phrase. There was us in the meadow, in a car, in his home or mine. But in every memory, one of us told the other…

'I love you.'

I retreated to reality, and awoke to find Edward and the rest of the Cullens gathered around me in shock. Edward was shaking me and yelling my name. He stopped when he saw me look around and remove my hand from his face.

"Bella, what happened?! Your eyes went completely black, you stopped moving, I thought something horrible had happened. Please tell me what's going on!" I just listened to his voice, letting the clarity and richness of it seep into me. I took a great breath of air in, and then looked deeply into his eyes. Those emotions were still there, as well as the one I couldn't place. But I slowly began to see what it was. It was love.

I laughed, a true laugh, something I hadn't done in a long time, and I threw my arms around his neck and held him to me as tightly as I could. He stiffened for a second, and then relaxed as his embrace around me tightened as well.

"Are you real?" He questioned me.

"I think so," I murmured back to him, "Or else reality is playing one hell of a trick on us." He chuckled at this, one of my favorite noises in the world. But it was full of relief, almost as if the air was being knocked out of him.

"You're really here this time, right?" I asked, unsure

"What do you mean?" he asked, never letting go of me, simply whispering in my ear. This didn't bother me, I don't think I would have taken it very well if he had moved away from me right then.

"When I was changed, I saw you there, at the very end. I thought you were real, but…" I stopped. How was I supposed to explain having hallucinations?

"I was there." He said simply. I pulled back from him then and looked very deeply into his eyes. They were full of compassion, but the same confusion I now felt.

"He's telling the truth," Emmett said, but neither Edward nor I turned to look at him. Neither of us was ready to look away from each other yet. Nonetheless, Emmett continued, "We were in the airport, and Edward collapsed on the ground. He starts mumbling stuff about not losing you then snaps back to reality sobbing about you being dead. It was really odd."

"You were there…" I said to Edward, my confusion deepening, "But just in our minds…How is that possible? Are we both crazy?"

"Nope, you're just in love." Alice said in her singsong voice. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see a huge grin on her face. "You love each other so much that when Bella theoretically died, Edward could tell. The connection between you is so strong that you can't survive without each other. So when one is hurt the other knew. That's so romantic!"

"Alice, that is so cliché and romantically mushy that it's sick." Rose said, ruining the moment. But I was sure what Alice said was right. If something had ever happened to Edward, I knew that some way or another, I would have known about it the moment it happened. That, and the fact I could never survive without Edward. We had already tried that once and look what had happened. I was kidnapped, changed, presumed dead, killed two sadistic vampires, and watched a friend die.

That made me remember Brendon, and his various body parts that I was still carrying. This made me want to dry heave. I looked around and saw that I had dropped his arm on the floor when I collapsed. I turned to Evander.

"Ummm, Evander, I need matches." Edward's eyes grew wide as he looked over to the arm. I felt myself stiffen as he looked away, afraid for no good reason. He noticed and quickly turned back to me. Evander meanwhile had gone to the kitchen and grabbed a few matches in the time lapse of a second or two. He carried the arm outside, and gave me a sympathetic look.

"I didn't think that was what I thought it was…whose arm is that?" I could tell from the look on Edward's face that he thought it was a human. I realized with dread that I hadn't feed in a good amount of days. My eyes must be pitch black by now.

"I didn't kill a human, Edward, I swear I didn't!" I pleaded with him. I didn't want him to think I was a monster. It was the greatest flaw that he saw in himself, what if he saw it in me? Would he leave?

"Bella, its okay, calm down." He saw my quickly escalading panic, and once again pulled me into an embrace and began to stroke my hair. I calmed immediately. "I would still like to know who that belongs to though." He asked. I held onto him for another moment, then pulled back and held him at arms length. His face was open and serene, and I knew that whatever I told him, he would forgive me. I took a deep breath, and started.

"His name was Brendon, and he-" But when Edward began a deep menacing growl, I stopped. The rest of the family was shocked.

"That's Brendon's arm?" Jasper asked. I nodded, dumbfounded.

"How do you know Brendon?" I asked.

"We went to stay with his family in Jacksonville. He had influenced his parents into thinking he didn't exist, and then tricked Alice into thinking you were fine on your own, without us." Esme explained.

"He brainwashed you Alice?" She nodded, "And his parents?!" Everyone nodded. I sat there dumbfounded. He had erased his life completely to try and create a new one with me. Jasper could feel the guilt coming off of me apparently, and a wave of calm hit me suddenly. I turned and smiled to him, but the smile was weak.

"Why did you come with him to Alaska?" Alice asked, and I saw Edward cringe. I realized it was because Alice had just asked the question he was dreading. He must have thought that I went with Brendon voluntarily, not for the reasons I did, but because I cared about him.

"I didn't come with him to Alaska." I said, "I was tricked into going on a trip to Canada, when I actually thought we were going to Forks, but then I decided I needed to come here." Everyone stared at me like I had grown a second head. "That didn't make much sense, huh?"

Carlisle's small laugh escaped him. "Perhaps we should move to a more comfortable place, and you can tell us what you've been doing all this time." It was then that I realized I was still on the floor in Edward's arms. I didn't really mind, anywhere that Edward was holding me was comfortable in my mind. But Edward simply picked me up bridal style and carried me to the living room.

Sitting there, with my family, I told them everything that had happened to me. Leaving Forks, meeting Brendon in Jacksonville, heading to Forks to see Charlie, but ending up in Canada. I told them about how I was changed, and how I saw Edward at the end. I told them about Alaska, finding Tanya, and meeting up with Laurent. At the most recent part of the tale, my epic battle and cliff scaling, the room grew very quiet, and no one spoke or asked questions as they had been doing. When I was done, I realized my tale had taken quite awhile to be told, another day had passed.

Edward suddenly crushed me into his chest, holding me so tightly that as a human, I would have broken a few ribs. He just shook his head.

"Bella, I am so sorry. If I had never left, none of this would have happened. If I had never been such an idiot-"He apologized, but I cut him off.

"Edward, this wasn't your fault. None of us could have seen this happening. Well, except maybe Alice…" She grinned, and I laughed. "But don't blame yourself for this, Edward. Everything is going to be okay, it will all turn out all right."

He gazed at me, and I was quite happy to find that his eyes still dazzled me as they always had. We looked at each other long enough that Jasper cleared his throat to break us out of our trance. I realized I hadn't been breathing, but now I didn't have to worry about that.

"This will all turn out all right?" he questioned again, posing the question more to himself than to me, but I nodded anyway.

"Yes. Besides, we've got eternity to work everything out, don't we?" He smiled, and it stunned me, so dazzlingly optimistic and joyous.

"We do have eternity, don't we?" I smiled and nodded, because that all I had ever wanted, an eternity with the one person I would always love. The one whose memories could not be forgotten in my mind. I could think of a million other reasons, but any other thought I had was erased as Edward's cool lips met mine, and I knew that I would be happy now, no matter what obstacles we face. Eternity was starting to sound better and better.

_Fin

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I would like to thank everyone who reviewed for this story at one point or another, all your thoughts and concerns mean so much more to me than you could comprehend. This being my first fanfic, its been great to find out what being a writer is really like. I've met tons of awesome people, and I think my writing has really improved. To all of you who have helped me (you know who you are, there's too many to mention) thank you a thousand times over. 

Even though this is the last chapter, I would still really appriciate reviews. Finishing this story was really hard, it just didn't seem to want to stop writing itself, but I am rather happy with how it turned out. Tell me what you think, I want to know!

As for those of you who are sad that this story is done, I would like to point out that my new story, Cinderbella, is now up and running! I think its off to a good start, and I want to see some reactions! Please check it out, I would be forever greatful.

This has been an amazing experience for me, I hope it was for you as well! Again, thank you all so much!


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